Venting is it actually possibke that im subconsciously faking my issues for some reason?

[coolgal82]

Like either for attention or to like fit a mold nicely and have some nice answer as to whats wrong with me or like cus im looking out for stuff it happens more?

it could also judt be noticing it more now im aware of stuff. it feels like most of my issues just suddenly appeared but also like my memory fucking sucks so i have no idea. idfk. although the same happened with my gender dysphoria,there was genuinely nothing until like 15-16 when it suddenly hit and it started off with a minor thing that made me go "could i be trans" and the more i thought about it the more the dysphoria started to like idk take hold. i felt this way about that for a while but i've managed to kinda accept it now.

i just dont know what in my head is real and what isnt and how real it is and why and its all so fucking confusing

 

[Forever Sleep]

Maybe but then, I suppose the need for attention could point to an imbalance/ insecurity. Sorry- not meaning to introduce the idea of more issues.

I sort of feel like diagnoses can be helpful. I've self diagnosed things and been wary of how they affect me. Things like limerence, borderline eating disorders, social anxiety. I've also (maybe unfairly) diagnosed people and situations in my life that affected me profoundly such as what I believe was (fairly classic) narcissistic abuse. That validated my experience and made me feel less crazy.

Ultimately though- whatever we want to term them, whatever doctors term them. Whether either or us are right about the actual term- surely, it's simply a case that we've becone aware that certain things are deeply troubling us in life and impeeding our ability to live it to the full. So- that makes them valid- surely? Whatever they are called.

Of course, if telling yourself you might be making mountains out of molehills (as it were,) is helping you to snap out of that way of thinking then- maybe that's worth pursuing as a coping mechanism for whatever it is.

Ultimately- this is your reality at the end of the day though. Even if it's happening in your head, it's real to you. We all know nightmares aren't real but they can still frighten us and even upset us the next day. I think it's just more how we learn to manage our minds as to how well we can cope in life.

I guess, if you're that concerned though, you could consult professionals who have a better grasp of varying conditions and what symptoms accompany them. Do you think having a firm idea of what you do and don't have would help you in life? If so, I definitely think you should pursue that.

 

[derpyderpins]

Like either for attention or to like fit a mold nicely and have some nice answer as to whats wrong with me or like cus im looking out for stuff it happens more?

it could also judt be noticing it more now im aware of stuff. it feels like most of my issues just suddenly appeared but also like my memory fucking sucks so i have no idea. idfk. although the same happened with my gender dysphoria,there was genuinely nothing until like 15-16 when it suddenly hit and it started off with a minor thing that made me go "could i be trans" and the more i thought about it the more the dysphoria started to like idk take hold. i felt this way about that for a while but i've managed to kinda accept it now.

i just dont know what in my head is real and what isnt and how real it is and why and its all so fucking confusing

Well I've also been really struggling with wanting to understand exactly what it is that's messed up in my brain. Been interested in brain scans to analyze depression, but that's a different topic.

I'd say, though, if you are subconciously - or even willfully - faking your issues it is because you have issues. And I mean that in the most forgiving way possible. What I mean is, don't use this thought process to completely invalidate your own struggles. The brain is so damn complicated. If you know something isn't right, then something isn't right. Now it could be an underlying issue that causes an issue that causes you to fake an issue for complicated Freudian reasons, or a minor thyroid imbalance. The brain is weird, and I think wanting answers makes sense.