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- Feb 12, 2023
- 99
i keep getting everything i want and more, but i still feel empty. i want more.
i get the attention that i crave, so much that it overwhelms me; but i want more. i get the grades i want, but i want them to be higher. i have people who care but i want them to somehow care more. i get the praises that i want, but i want more. i develop and adhere to a schedule that is optimal for improving productivity and my mental state, but it's never optimal enough. i lose a ridiculous amount of weight, but i need to lose more. i'm considered the best in a room, but i need to be even better. i complete every assignment and chore that needed to be completed, but i want to feel more productive. i'm considered someone's favorite person, but i need to mean even more to them.
i think i've always been this way.
nothing will ever be enough to make me happy or even content. it's so tiring, i want to get rid of this selfish, gluttonous mind. i can't live like this.
i am just doomed to be depressed. i've been getting nearly everything that i swore could make me happier, but it never feels like i'm getting enough of it.
i tried to think out all of my deepest issues and pinpoint the main factors for my misery, but it doesn't matter. even with nearly every single one of those factors gone/improved, i just feel so much worse.
i want to die. this life is too much. i've been experiencing so many physical symptoms from my horrible mental state. everything hurts, my whole body and mind are in so much pain. i feel so sick and dizzy all of the time. i just want it to be over.
i get the attention that i crave, so much that it overwhelms me; but i want more. i get the grades i want, but i want them to be higher. i have people who care but i want them to somehow care more. i get the praises that i want, but i want more. i develop and adhere to a schedule that is optimal for improving productivity and my mental state, but it's never optimal enough. i lose a ridiculous amount of weight, but i need to lose more. i'm considered the best in a room, but i need to be even better. i complete every assignment and chore that needed to be completed, but i want to feel more productive. i'm considered someone's favorite person, but i need to mean even more to them.
i think i've always been this way.
nothing will ever be enough to make me happy or even content. it's so tiring, i want to get rid of this selfish, gluttonous mind. i can't live like this.
i am just doomed to be depressed. i've been getting nearly everything that i swore could make me happier, but it never feels like i'm getting enough of it.
i tried to think out all of my deepest issues and pinpoint the main factors for my misery, but it doesn't matter. even with nearly every single one of those factors gone/improved, i just feel so much worse.
i want to die. this life is too much. i've been experiencing so many physical symptoms from my horrible mental state. everything hurts, my whole body and mind are in so much pain. i feel so sick and dizzy all of the time. i just want it to be over.
