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CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
Seven minutes before I begin the medication. One hour before SN ingestion. The only thing I'm afraid of is surviving this. Please if there is a god out there, don't let me survive this, I'm ready to go
 
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Fate

Fate

Nothingness is blissful
Aug 10, 2024
105
I hope you find the peace you're after. May the universe offer a smooth transition to what lays beyondđź•Š
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,801
I hope you find peace!

You just made an account a few days ago and I don't know you but I'm sorry you have to go through this and that there's no other solution for you.
 
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Peace2peace

Student
Dec 26, 2024
164
Am going soon to my pains will surely be over
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,610
I hope you find peace soon, best of luck!
 
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C

CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
Seven minutes before I begin the medication. One hour before SN ingestion. The only thing I'm afraid of is surviving this. Please if there is a god out there, don't let me survive this, I'm ready to go
I'll update as long as I can to ensure that my death or my lack there of is accounted for. I will be strictly following the sn bible but there is always the fear of survival. I've survived ODing twice and countless times of overindulging on pills and other drugs. If I survive I am sure I will be going away for a long time, I am scared for people to see the way I have permanently mutilated myself so death is necessary. I can't stand to face the repercussions of my actions leading up to tonight. I simply wish to be reunited with my babies in a place where I will no longer fight addiction, mental illness, delusions, and a terrible past that I cannot escape. I pray for a smooth passing. 12 minutes ago I took 600mg of ibuprofen. In 8 minutes I will take the antiemetics and mix together my sn
I'll update as long as I can to ensure that my death or my lack there of is accounted for. I will be strictly following the sn bible but there is always the fear of survival. I've survived ODing twice and countless times of overindulging on pills and other drugs. If I survive I am sure I will be going away for a long time, I am scared for people to see the way I have permanently mutilated myself so death is necessary. I can't stand to face the repercussions of my actions leading up to tonight. I simply wish to be reunited with my babies in a place where I will no longer fight addiction, mental illness, delusions, and a terrible past that I cannot escape. I pray for a smooth passing. 12 minutes ago I took 600mg of ibuprofen. In 8 minutes I will take the antiemetics and mix together my sn
The live action Scooby Doo 2 is my movie of choice for when I go. It's my comfort movie, it reminds me of being a kid sitting with my siblings on a rainy day. It's raining right now, I feel nostalgic for the past. Being a little girl again. I hope death will be like having someone carry you to bed after you fall asleep on the couch after begging your parents that you weren't tired. Time to take the antiemetics
 
Last edited:
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CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
I'll update as long as I can to ensure that my death or my lack there of is accounted for. I will be strictly following the sn bible but there is always the fear of survival. I've survived ODing twice and countless times of overindulging on pills and other drugs. If I survive I am sure I will be going away for a long time, I am scared for people to see the way I have permanently mutilated myself so death is necessary. I can't stand to face the repercussions of my actions leading up to tonight. I simply wish to be reunited with my babies in a place where I will no longer fight addiction, mental illness, delusions, and a terrible past that I cannot escape. I pray for a smooth passing. 12 minutes ago I took 600mg of ibuprofen. In 8 minutes I will take the antiemetics and mix together my sn

The live action Scooby Doo 2 is my movie of choice for when I go. It's my comfort movie, it reminds me of being a kid sitting with my siblings on a rainy day. It's raining right now, I feel nostalgic for the past. Being a little girl again. I hope death will be like having someone carry you to bed after you fall asleep on the couch after begging your parents that you weren't tired. Time to take the antiemetics
12 more minutes, please God grant me mercy, let me rest, I'm so tired, let me go
 
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fallintotheshadows

fallintotheshadows

Member
Oct 23, 2023
61
If I live long enough I am making it a goal to make assisted suicide legal for mental illness as well people having to resort to methods like this is unfortunate there should be a more surefire way that's painless
 
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CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
One more cigarette to calm my nerves, I wanna watch the rain fall
I'm so scared, this will be my last post unless I survive or I do not die fast enough. I'm sitting outside smoking my last cigarette listening to the rain. The love of my life was supposed to come see me in the morning, I don't want him to lose someone else but I can't go on. If I survive this I think I will crumble.

God let it be quick, let it be peaceful, please don't let me be alone, I'm praying in front of the sn ready to go. Mama forgive me, my sister, please be okay, forgive me and let me die peacefully. Don't let it be cold. I'm scared of the cold.

I drank it. Oh god I drank it. Deep breaths. Deep breaths. Deep breaths in and out. I'll drink the second glass to be safe. I haven't vomited. I'll wait the three minutes see if I feel anything.

It's 5:11 now and I don't feel anything, was it not pure enough??? Did I not drink enough??? Was i always doomed to fail??? Oh god what do I do?? I'm gunna drink the second glass

After I drink this I'm going to lay down and go to sleep. If I don't die then I'll commit myself when I wake. I should have known I would fail my own Ctb, I failed everything else in life.

It's 5:16, I drank some of the second cup and I'm beginning to feel a little dizzy. I need to finish it. I don't have the strength to keep typing I just need to finish and go to whatever waits for me, if it's hospitalization or death, though only one outcome sounds appealing
 
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CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over
I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over
That was my last act of self love. I give up, I will waste away in a facility, I'm done. I'm so so done. I will never be granted peace
 
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ItsyBitsyWeetard

ItsyBitsyWeetard

Member
Jun 1, 2024
98
I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over

That was my last act of self love. I give up, I will waste away in a facility, I'm done. I'm so so done. I will never be granted peace
im so sorry this seems horrible even if u vomited theres a good change ur body already absorbed enough drink as much as u can of the 2nd glass. doesnt need to be the full thing
 
T

tbh2023

Experienced
Nov 4, 2024
201
I'll update as long as I can to ensure that my death or my lack there of is accounted for. I will be strictly following the sn bible but there is always the fear of survival. I've survived ODing twice and countless times of overindulging on pills and other drugs. If I survive I am sure I will be going away for a long time, I am scared for people to see the way I have permanently mutilated myself so death is necessary. I can't stand to face the repercussions of my actions leading up to tonight. I simply wish to be reunited with my babies in a place where I will no longer fight addiction, mental illness, delusions, and a terrible past that I cannot escape. I pray for a smooth passing. 12 minutes ago I took 600mg of ibuprofen. In 8 minutes I will take the antiemetics and mix together my sn

The live action Scooby Doo 2 is my movie of choice for when I go. It's my comfort movie, it reminds me of being a kid sitting with my siblings on a rainy day. It's raining right now, I feel nostalgic for the past. Being a little girl again. I hope death will be like having someone carry you to bed after you fall asleep on the couch after begging your parents that you weren't tired. Time to take the antiemetics
It's my fav movie too! I hope you get what makes you happy
I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over

That was my last act of self love. I give up, I will waste away in a facility, I'm done. I'm so so done. I will never be granted peace
Is it too nasty?
 
Sbetto

Sbetto

chill guy
Dec 6, 2024
28
I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over

That was my last act of self love. I give up, I will waste away in a facility, I'm done. I'm so so done. I will never be granted peace
How are you feeling now?
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
39,660
I hope you find the peace you wish for, I wish you the best.
 
C

CherryGirl675

Today is the day
Jan 7, 2025
22
I woke up. I feel horribly sick but I'm awake. When I was sleeping I had a dream that something was telling me to choose. And when I opened my eyes I saw the angel of death that I had seen the two times I overdosed standing over me. Now I'm scared, I don't want her to take me. I'm going to the hospital
 
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CatLvr

Paragon
Aug 1, 2024
919
Bless you! I am SO sad and sorry you have had such an awful experience. I am hopeful that the hospital treated you well and the psych ward does also. May you find the peace we all seek.
 
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AUROR4

AUROR4

Member
Dec 20, 2024
35
The SN i bought is mixed in a curing salt so it's 6.25% SN and the rest table salt. I have enough that if I mixed and ingested the entire supply I would be ingesting 28 g of SN. Will this work? I'm scared it won't work because it's not just SN but it's mixed with table salt.
Sorry, but it was obvious that this wasn't going to work. the purity of the SN has to be greater than 95%. You have been warned about this.

I vomited. I couldn't keep it down, oh god is this it? I couldn't finish the second glass and I'm too weak to make a new one let alone stomach another. I will probably be committed in the morning, it's all over
I woke up. I feel horribly sick but I'm awake. When I was sleeping I had a dream that something was telling me to choose.

I wish you a speedy recovery and that you will soon be able to find the peace you are looking for.
 
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