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theconductor25

theconductor25

Member
Sep 7, 2024
27
Well, I literally just booked a hotel room for tomorrow. Currently in the process of packing and preparing all my ctb materials (SN method). Honestly, I thought I would be so anxious/nervous during this part of the process, but I kind of don't feel anything, pretty apathetic ngl (*nvm started feeling anxious as I typed this*). The only thing that's been running through my mind is the effect this is gonna have on my family. Thanksgiving is definitely gonna be ruined...I plan on leaving my ID and my mom's phone number on a table for the cops to call my mom once they find me. That phone call is really gonna suck for her and I feel so bad about that :/

This is my first real CTB attempt, so I'm not sure what to expect in terms of SI. I'm confident I'll be able to go through with it though, as long as everything goes to plan. Gonna make some lava cakes with ice cream for my last meal before I start fasting. Have till like 2 am before I have to fast since I plan on ctbing late Saturday night (technically Sunday morning).

There's not really a purpose to this post, just felt like typing out what I'm feeling...
 
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N

notahappygirl

Student
Jun 6, 2023
181
Wishing you the best and sending lots of love ❤️❤️
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
39,616
I wish you the best, I hope that you find peace.
 
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C

CatLvr

Paragon
Aug 1, 2024
918
Since this is your first time (there are so many of us with multiple attempts for one reason ir another) let me say there is no shame in changing your mind and waiting. However, I understand your pain and whatever your decision, ultimately, I support you. May you find the peace we all seek.
 
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Roadrunner

Roadrunner

Experienced
Mar 18, 2024
216
Wish you the best.
 
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TragedyBornCrimson

TragedyBornCrimson

I accept my eternal punishment
Oct 19, 2023
245
Good luck, don't fell bad if you choose to back out, you may find something to live for.
 
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