Mini attempts??

[deepsweetdiver]

This is probably dumb but I find myself doing mini-attempts throughout my day. Like trying to hang myself with a blanket, and tying it to a door knob. Using my jacket on towel racks. (stupidly) Trying to tie myself to my bedroom fan.

I know I sound dumb. I just want to go, but I feel like an idiot because I can't get the courage to actually go through with it. Any hopes of mine don't mean anything. I don't mean anything. I might as well be dead, or even better just never existed at all.

 

[Subhumano]

Maybe the practice will help you when you finally do it

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I once had a mini attempt last year, at uni, where I impulsively tried to hang myself in the washroom. I knew it wouldn't work but at the time my suicidal urges had gotten so bad that I ended up giving in to them.

 

[deepsweetdiver]

Maybe the practice will help you when you finally do it

Lololol thats what I've been thinking! All of the mini attempts better be worth it

I once had a mini attempt last year, at uni, where I impulsively tried to hang myself in the washroom. I knew it wouldn't work but at the time my suicidal urges had gotten so bad that I ended up giving in to them.

That's how it feels for me, and thats the word I was looking for, all of the mini attempts are very impulsive for me. Who knows when I'll entirely give in.

 

[ma0]

You know what they say, practice makes perfect.

 

[Pale_Rider]

I know when I first started this journey I would do things to make myself feel like I was moving towards my objective. I was originally gonna throw myself in front of a train, so I spent a lot of time looking for a certain train type. I also started getting rid of things. Lightening my load I called it. usually I was really depressed, but when I did these things I would feel normal like all was right with the world.

 

[LittleNelson]

I often get the urge and do something stupid like swallow a half a bottle of aspirin or slit my wrists. I've actually done both of these things in the last month. I know this won't actually kill me but sometimes you just need to fell something. It's like I'm crying out to the Universe to help me.

 

[Thomas599]

Suicide should NOT be done out of desperation or an overly emotional cry for help. Do some research on this topic:

Rational Suicide:

It was believed for a long time that people brought to the attention of healthcare and/or legal authorities with suicidality were automatically deemed to lack medical decision-making capacity or competence. This is despite many of these patients possessing the "mental ability to make a rational decision, which includes the ability to perceive, to appreciate all relevant facts and to reach a rational judgment upon such facts". Several ethical and psychiatric specialists and defenders of patient rights have criticized this traditional paternalistic approach for failing to respect the right of a competent, rational person to self-determination and autonomy.

As society increasingly recognizes patients' rights to refuse treatment, their autonomy to make decisions and the right to self-determination, the bioethical, medical and legal community must strive to identify those individuals who are not just impulsively acting and/or under the influence of factors that may hinder their capacity. As moral people who respect competent individuals who make rational decisions, regardless of whether we agree with them or not, we have a duty to respect their right to self-determination and suicide.
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