Method My method in process, kinda a vent

[sadbabyyata]

I want advice i tried to read many reddit forums and quora certain other websites and books but i want affirmation that my understanding is right maybe its a basic question but itd be horrible to fail an attempt from a simple misunderstanding ive become recently more open to new methods of suicide ive tried 5 times not all with diff combos of ills i keep failing it lead me to read other sections on lostallhope than just the mlds i couldnt even find acces to half the meds i tried with fent alone i thought maybe if i tried to do more id be more effective but i dont want to fail again i wanted to try mixing alcohol and benzos but i couldnt find a way to get benzos maybe with grapefruit juice fent and alcohol alone would it be enough but i want more surety i had prior attempt with grapefruit and oxy failed i started to look into other ways of taking meds like injecting i wanted to find a way to find some h but everyone who has anything similar told me no one does it anymore but idk how you could inject fent i dont know anything about injecting in general like esp tablets? I tried to research but i wasnt sure if itd work idk what else i could inject but smoking n injesting by mouth is working i started reading when i guess i glanced over it for years the maybe perfect method idk of i just didnt see it before or if it was a new addition to lostallhope but ills and a bag i dont know how id ever get my hands on barbituates idk if i have the patience idk where to find them ive tried so many times and ive waited of ten years to die im sure of my decision i just want to find a way to go in my bed the bag might be the missing factor i started thinking how can i get fent into the bag ill pass out if i smoke i wont be able to put on the bag in time so i was thinking how this could work i started thinking abt like a tube maybe if i burned them in a metal something idk what i want help brainstorming what that could be but a container would the smoke build up in there if i had a tube connecting to my bag ? N if i drank grapefruit the days proceeding fasting best i could a few days and drinking alcohol + the ills in the metal container with a tube the smoke coming in the bag hopefully knocking me out the bag doing the rest ? I want peoples thoughts of this would it work ? To use it almost like a gas its where my next rabbit hole comes in gas!? I never thought of it i heard abt carbon monoide in a car but i dont have access to a car i could do this with where else would i get this i just never reserched it or gases in general because apparently it doesnt have to be carbon monoxide it could be any gas i never read this section on lostallhope bc i thought abt the gas chambers in ww3 i thought i cant go like that.. but i was watching rottenmango podcasts a new video she talked abt chloroform but before i heard the man who did stuff in her vids background i thought he may of been an everyday citizen like me i was like i should look that up how do you get that? That could possibly be gasses into my bag it started my openess to this type of suicide apparently chloroform does not look or seam the best of ways to go it seams like alot of chemical burns and hurt and puking blood n in your urine its not completely off the table their were people in quorq explaining how to make it but i started researching gases im still not sure about all the gases the easiest to obtain i prefer a lesser painful one but i would consider one that induced some suffering i found out helium supposdely can kill its unbelievble i didnt know this my whole life i couldve been dead years ago without all this nonsense idk why i didnt know this its sounds amazing and lowkeh made me second guess fentbenzoalcohol combo this might be better but im scared to fail i was research tanks of helium but the party tanks ? Apparently are 20 percent oxygen but its what im not so sure about.. helium would knock me out despite the 20 percent oxygen im pretty sure. I saw a guy on ytb be knocked out by a few breaths full but maybe he was acting i wouldnt be conscious i was thinking about how oxygen would be in bag keeping me alive but it may sound silly this discovery but i dropped out in 6th grade so my understanding of chemistry and other stuff is incredibly low but i think your body changes oxygen to carbon dioxide? Or something but the oxygen would then be gone all that left on the bag would be helium and carbon dioxide than? So youd die but the point of helium would be to avoid that awful urge to breathe from the cd building in your blood? But im unconscious which the point of the bag id ro get yourself unconscious and die from that state instead of suffering awake but my question is if when you breathe air it turns to carbon dioxide but helium when you breath it does it change to another chemical or gas? Would i come out of my unconscious state and want to rip of the bag bc of the 20 percent carbon dioxide thatd be in the bag? Or would i be unconscious and not notice and just drift off to the afterlife ? What if i mixed it with fent and alchol and grapefruit? Plus helium? The bag? Advice on how not to fail is there errors in my thinking and processing about the helium? Do i understand this right ? Idk how i can get 100 perrcent helium is it possible to do this with a party tank? Like with 20 percent oxygen?