• Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

G

golgappa

Member
Oct 7, 2024
68
My fear has come true.

My life is over.

I don't want to be alive, but I can't die. I am in pain. Sometimes it feels like I'm in hell, being tortured by God. We all are. I feel like I'm just a toy that God is laughing at. No matter how much I beg or try to fix my life, I find myself back here—shaking in fear.

The love my family and friends give me feels more like torture than something that should bring happiness. Every action I take feels like I'm on the verge of falling, with everyone laughing at me, scoffing, "Oh, she did it again." I'm tired. I want to be dead.

I pray every day to be shot or hit by a car or bus, but something always stops me from just standing in the middle of the road, waiting for it to happen. I don't know how to deal with these emotions..
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Praestat_Mori
P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,656
Somewhat relatable. It's so draining and painful to not want to be alive and not being able to die. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
39,130
I really understand feeling so tired of suffering in this existence, it's so cruel to me how existence causes all this pain. But anyway I wish you the best.
 

Similar threads

Renv1o_
Replies
2
Views
181
Suicide Discussion
Clam
Clam
annoyed
Replies
1
Views
88
Suicide Discussion
exiled
exiled
L
Replies
6
Views
201
Suicide Discussion
losttagain
L
K
Replies
5
Views
217
Suicide Discussion
foreverlanguish
foreverlanguish
aikou
Replies
1
Views
94
Recovery
Mirrory Me
Mirrory Me