Help need help, I think I am developing something for a girl

[dyingslowly]

I do not know her in rl
I have never met her in rl

She is an insta girl that has number of followers and isn't much popular, but she interacts with people who follow her and such and is very kind (on the outside), and I kind of followed her initially with no reason but overtime I am becoming more and more obsessed with her. I don't know what to do at this point, I want to ask how to get her out of my brain, this happened after I stopped medication for little time since with meds, I am safe guarded from this bullshit with meds. But have you found yourself in this situation before and if so, what have you done to shrug off the attraction developed.

 

[Mirrory Me]

Um, it's pretty likely that nothing too serious is gonna happen between you two. You should try to connect with someone one you can actually meet IRL.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

This is parasocial limerence at its finest. For your own sake it's better to let it go as soon as you can before it takes hold and reaches the point where you literally cannot accept a relationship with anybody else in the universe.

One thing that helps is to think about what would happen even in the crazy hypothetical 1-in-a-million scenario where you actually did end up with her. So then what? Are you going to beg her to shut down her Instagram account? That account was how you found her in the first place after all so even if you're with her, now you have to constantly be wary about other dudes who are trying to be just like you and they could have better looks, more money, a faster car, citizenship in Finland, etc. Even if you somehow became her boyfriend your life would be a constant neverending source of paranoia and insecurity. For all you know she could already have a partner but she keeps them hidden on purpose because obviously she's not going to receive as much engagement on her account if some random dude keeps making appearances. She's just farming for attention and validation that not even he can give her. Just don't bother.

 

[dyingslowly]

This is parasocial limerence at its finest. For your own sake it's better to let it go as soon as you can before it takes hold and reaches the point where you literally cannot accept a relationship with anybody else in the universe.

One thing that helps is to think about what would happen even in the crazy hypothetical 1-in-a-million scenario where you actually did end up with her. So then what? Are you going to beg her to shut down her Instagram account? That account was how you found her in the first place after all so even if you're with her, now you have to constantly be wary about other dudes who are trying to be just like you and they could have better looks, more money, a faster car, citizenship in Finland, etc. Even if you somehow became her boyfriend your life would be a constant neverending source of paranoia and insecurity. For all you know she could already have a partner but she keeps them hidden on purpose because obviously she's not going to receive as much engagement on her account if some random dude keeps making appearances. She's just farming for attention and validation that not even he can give her. Just don't bother.

Bro, I appreciate your words and wisdom, but I have barely survived my second heart break and became suicidal, I know for sure me and her is never going to happen, I have looked at my internet history I am constantly going to her profile and looking at her pictures I am unable to stop myself. There is a comforting feeling that comes after looking at her, I know it is nothing but false. I am unable to stop it, and she does clearly get her ego boost from all the compliments she is getting from guys. I don't know that she has a bf or not, but I will trust your word on it that they keep them hidden.

Um, it's pretty likely that nothing too serious is gonna happen between you two. You should try to connect with someone one you can actually meet IRL.

But fun thing is that I am so ugly that this is not even possible too lol, this shit is making me more suicidal. I am the perfect creep that girls talk about. (I need to be dead for the better of the world and for myself)

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Bro, I appreciate your words and wisdom, but I have barely survived my second heart break and became suicidal, I know for sure me and her is never going to happen, I have looked at my internet history I am constantly going to her profile and looking at her pictures I am unable to stop myself.

I know. It might already be too late then if you really can't stop. All you can really do is try your best to focus on the negative parts of what would happen even if you got your wish. I know that you know that it's false but it's up to you to also remind yourself of why it is false. I don't know if that'll actually make you feel better, but it can only prevent you from feeling much much worse.

But fun thing is that I am so ugly that this is not even possible too lol, this shit is making me more suicidal. I am the perfect creep that girls talk about. (I need to be dead for the better of the world and for myself)

Oof. I 100% relate to this. If I had any advice about this I'd give it but then if I had any at all I wouldn't even need to be here on this forum.

 

[dyingslowly]

I know. It might already be too late then if you really can't stop. All you can really do is try your best to focus on the negative parts of what would happen even if you got your wish. I know that you know that it's false but it's up to you to also remind yourself of why it is false. I don't know if that'll actually make you feel better, but it can only prevent you from feeling much much worse.


Oof. I 100% relate to this. If I had any advice about this I'd give it but then if I had any at all I wouldn't even need to be here on this forum.

Thank you so much :) bro

 

[DisillusionedDruid]

Bro, I appreciate your words and wisdom, but I have barely survived my second heart break and became suicidal, I know for sure me and her is never going to happen, I have looked at my internet history I am constantly going to her profile and looking at her pictures I am unable to stop myself. There is a comforting feeling that comes after looking at her, I know it is nothing but false. I am unable to stop it, and she does clearly get her ego boost from all the compliments she is getting from guys. I don't know that she has a bf or not, but I will trust your word on it that they keep them hidden.

But fun thing is that I am so ugly that this is not even possible too lol, this shit is making me more suicidal. I am the perfect creep that girls talk about. (I need to be dead for the better of the world and for myself)

This made my heart hurt for you. I can relate, except I'm deluded into believe I'm decent looking. Apparently I'm not though. All the same, I can relate to the same result you have and how much easier being dead would be. I never want anyone here to do it, but entirely appreciate if they want to or will. Thank you for sharing. You actually helped me a bit. I feel, strangely, less alone because of you and this post. Thank you man

 

[ghost-shock]

I understand, finding a relationship with someone in real life is practically impossible so its easier to find someone to like online. Ive never met someone in person where there was mutual attraction. The closest ive gotten to that is online.