• If you haven't yet, we highly encourage you to check out our Recovery Resources thread!
  • Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

    Bitcoin Address (BTC): 39deg9i6Zp1GdrwyKkqZU6rAbsEspvLBJt

    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9

    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8

  • Security update: At around 2:28AM EST, the site was labeled as malicious by Google erroneously, causing users to get a "Dangerous site" warning in most browsers. It appears that this was done by mistake and has been reversed by Google. It may take a few hours for you to stop seeing those warnings.

    If you're still getting these warnings, please let a member of staff know.
megafire

megafire

burn it down
Oct 12, 2020
89
Some days I am in the deepest depression (like last week, for instance), wanting nothing but to escape the vicious cycle that is my life. I know how, where, and why, and a general timeframe. After a few days of that, one morning I wake up (and don't immediately regret doing so- which is different) and it's a beautiful sun-shiney day, and the only thing I can think about is how excited I am to drink some coffee. It's so sudden, literally night and day.
That's not to say that the suicidal thoughts are completely out of the picture- they just move from the front of my brain to the back. It's still stewing, but not bubbling over. What the hell?? it's so damn confusing.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Sensei
F

fox21132113

Student
Sep 8, 2020
119
I know exactly how you feel. When all is well, I wonder where did the depression go, this is odd, I know it's somewhere around here. Or bam!!! Out of no where, I just cry. No reason, just crying and the cycle goes on.
 
T

timf

Enlightened
Mar 26, 2020
1,250
You may want to keep a diary. A cyclical process may have environmental or even nutritional influences. If it is biological, you may wish to experiment with supplements or even medications.

The fact that you have good days is encouraging. The key is to discover how to sustain and expand them.
 
Sensei

Sensei

剣道家
Nov 4, 2019
6,336
I'm no psychologist or psychiatrist, but it sounds like cyclothymia.
 

Similar threads

Chuuya-Chan ⋆. 𐙚˚
Replies
0
Views
106
Recovery
Chuuya-Chan ⋆. 𐙚˚
Chuuya-Chan ⋆. 𐙚˚
FaultyCepheus
Replies
0
Views
86
Suicide Discussion
FaultyCepheus
FaultyCepheus
imsotired005
Replies
0
Views
103
Suicide Discussion
imsotired005
imsotired005
uselessflesh
Replies
1
Views
103
Suicide Discussion
yowai
yowai