R
rozeske
Maybe I am the problem
- Dec 2, 2023
- 3,799
Today marks the one year adversary of the day I joined this site, the moment I decided to end it all. After the collapse of the last bit of hope I had to live a better life, I lost the very little fight I had in me to keep going. I was very determined to leave asap and had absolutely no will of going forward. After finding this site and lurking for a few weeks and failing my first, hopefully last, attempt, I joined for a reason of mostly to just say goodbye to this community on my way out. Little did I know I'd still be here one year later :)
Among several complications and obstacles that kept me here, finding this community I believe is the main reason I was able to stay this long. So much for the claim that this place is the reason for people's suicide. It was the very reason that kept me going even when i was looking to die. This place has given me so much more than anyone can comprehend to cope with my life in those months, and i wasn't even looking for it, i just wanted to die. Above all when i was on the verge to snap, it's been a place that helped me keep my sanity, which is the only good thing I've got going for me right now and the thing i need the most to plan my exit. Even though I still am actively suicidal looking forward to be gone soon, I'm glad I didn't commit with the mental state I was in. Even though I would have prefered to have been gone by now, I am so grateful to the time I was given by this community. I'm glad I found this place and I fucking love and appreciate you all!!
Among several complications and obstacles that kept me here, finding this community I believe is the main reason I was able to stay this long. So much for the claim that this place is the reason for people's suicide. It was the very reason that kept me going even when i was looking to die. This place has given me so much more than anyone can comprehend to cope with my life in those months, and i wasn't even looking for it, i just wanted to die. Above all when i was on the verge to snap, it's been a place that helped me keep my sanity, which is the only good thing I've got going for me right now and the thing i need the most to plan my exit. Even though I still am actively suicidal looking forward to be gone soon, I'm glad I didn't commit with the mental state I was in. Even though I would have prefered to have been gone by now, I am so grateful to the time I was given by this community. I'm glad I found this place and I fucking love and appreciate you all!!