• Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

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J

j1nxxb0yjj4ke

Member
Jun 26, 2023
67
I wasn't so suicidal a month ago,
I don't know what happened but God, I just wanna and wanted to die.

I had dreams, plans. I wanted to start making my own music, krushclub, scenecore - shoegaze - emo rap/trap - metalcore, deathcore.
Mostly wanted to start w/ krushclub & scenecore,
even though I do NOT know how (have FL Studio Producer Edition, Nexus, Serum, Valhalla), and NO, the tutorials on YouTube are shit.
I also dreamed of and wanted to design my own clothes, have my own clothing brand.
Become successful, rich, famous, hot.
I was doing crypto, somewhat successfully.
I'm trans and I've been in therapy for like 5 years for this and finally the HRT should get going soon.
I got my own tattoo gun, I wanted to be fully tattooed.
I had work, I somewhat did not like it but it wasn't the worst, to be honest it was actually good. A social year, 743 bucks a month, for me (re-)doing my high school diploma.
I'm in a relationship, I love him even though he feels like a leech.
I know a girl and God, she's just heaven.
My dad doesn't beat me up anymore, trusts me with money, generally hast some trust in me again, we have a bond, a nice one. After years, decades.

I don't know why.
But I feel so free, and happy.
Knowing it's been shipped and arriving shortly.
I know I can just leave and I had in mind doing it maybe 1-2 weeks after it comes through.
Latest in late December, but I think I'll do it earlier.
And even if not (idk why even, but well, the human mind..), I STILL have it then and KNOW I can be gone forever.

I'll post updates, when it arrives, and when I'm taking it.

Take Care!
Much Love,
J
 
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vanillamilkshakes

vanillamilkshakes

Aspiring Corpse
Aug 26, 2024
435
Good-luck with your surgery, and your DMC parcel I hope it gets to you safe :)
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

death will be my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,333
I hope you find peace soon regardless of what you do in the future, best of luck
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,657
Good luck! I hope u find peace!
 
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