Ifonlysheknew
Member
- Apr 24, 2018
- 31
I realise that my brain tends to constantly find something to harp on to. Be it good or bad.
On a good day, it'll probably be something along the lines of "I didn't do enough work", or "but will I regret this later"
Yeah, it's not the most pleasant, but bareable.
But when something goes wrong,
Oh god
It's horrendous. It's like I can no longer function. It's all I can think of. It's like, I'm already on the edge and this just sends me hurtling down. Even if, in restrospect, it's not that big of a deal.
Right now,
I just passed the money to my weed dealer who was suppose to be back in like 2 hrs to pass me the stuff.
That was yesterday.
Since then he hasn't replied or answered any calls. I saw him online on WhatsApp once or twice, but he didn't even read the messages.
And I am fucking losing my shit.
I don't know what's going on, whether I've been scammed (I've bought from him before with no issue).
I don't know what to do, in terms of calling again or just waiting a while.
-if anyone can advice me on what to do here that'd be great k thanks
But it's driving me crazy. It's not that I need the weed.
I just cannot take this not knowing. This lack of control.
The fact that I fucked up (again), and it's stopping me from being able to function and do other things. This is what worries me, that I can't functiik as a person when things like this happen. Now, I know it's life and all and stuff happen, can't control it,
But how do I just get on with it?
It feels like I'm mentally crippled (more than before).
How do I not feel like this?
On a good day, it'll probably be something along the lines of "I didn't do enough work", or "but will I regret this later"
Yeah, it's not the most pleasant, but bareable.
But when something goes wrong,
Oh god
It's horrendous. It's like I can no longer function. It's all I can think of. It's like, I'm already on the edge and this just sends me hurtling down. Even if, in restrospect, it's not that big of a deal.
Right now,
I just passed the money to my weed dealer who was suppose to be back in like 2 hrs to pass me the stuff.
That was yesterday.
Since then he hasn't replied or answered any calls. I saw him online on WhatsApp once or twice, but he didn't even read the messages.
And I am fucking losing my shit.
I don't know what's going on, whether I've been scammed (I've bought from him before with no issue).
I don't know what to do, in terms of calling again or just waiting a while.
-if anyone can advice me on what to do here that'd be great k thanks
But it's driving me crazy. It's not that I need the weed.
I just cannot take this not knowing. This lack of control.
The fact that I fucked up (again), and it's stopping me from being able to function and do other things. This is what worries me, that I can't functiik as a person when things like this happen. Now, I know it's life and all and stuff happen, can't control it,
But how do I just get on with it?
It feels like I'm mentally crippled (more than before).
How do I not feel like this?