quietwater
delusional poet
- May 2, 2023
- 88
I don't even know where to start and what to say in this thread, so it will probably be just a ramble about things and feelings, sorry if it doesn't make sense.
I just feel like a parasite.
Everything in my life is going badly because I exist. I don't even do anything at all, I exist — I wake up and do nothing all day, pay for my things, exist, stay quiet, and it's always, always, my fault anyways. No matter how much I try to make myself nonexistent, less and less like a human being and more like a presence, it will always be my fault. Because I exist. I exist and by existing I ruin everything, everytime, everywhere. I just want it to end. I want to die so badly. Everything is and always will be my fault, even if I don't do anything… it's a strange sensation.
I believe I've never felt this low before.
I just feel like a parasite.
Everything in my life is going badly because I exist. I don't even do anything at all, I exist — I wake up and do nothing all day, pay for my things, exist, stay quiet, and it's always, always, my fault anyways. No matter how much I try to make myself nonexistent, less and less like a human being and more like a presence, it will always be my fault. Because I exist. I exist and by existing I ruin everything, everytime, everywhere. I just want it to end. I want to die so badly. Everything is and always will be my fault, even if I don't do anything… it's a strange sensation.
I believe I've never felt this low before.
