Hotwire
New Member
- May 17, 2023
- 2
Howdy. Here's a quick list of CHEAP and EASILY ACCESSIBLE things you can put into your sad, frowning mouth for a chance at recovering from catatonic sadness. I want you to disprove everybody who doubted you. I want you to live. I want you to affirm the eternal dignity of your spirit. I was a goner haha but these things helped me. These aren't psychedelics or other "serious" drugs, they're like fucking vitamins — but the difference they can make in this fight against self-murder is substantial. It's an advantage we should all take.
5-HTP aka 5-hydroxytryptophan \\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Putting this first because it rules.
You'll find oceans of other testimony about it online, so I'll spare you mine except to say it's stronger and more reliable than any rx I've tried and it's dirt cheap.
Some people experience this thing really differently, though, so pay close attention to your first reaction. Either way, it will surprise you.
SAM-e aka S-Adenosyl Methionine \\\\\\\\\\\\
Overlooked! How did I miss this one for so long?? Kicking myself.
Great across diagnoses, but a reliable win against THE DARKNESS WITHIN. Take it first thing in the marnin w your new 5-HTP and some coffee and you'll be kicking some ass.
Magnesium Citrate \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
A big jar of these gummies is like ten bucks and they're like candy. But when have twizzlers or haribo gummy bears made you feel more alive?
Not everybody's depression results from an intraneuronal magnesium deficit — maybe yours is? Even if not, it reliably alleviates anxiety in almost everybody.
Strangely good for vision disorders too, ie visual cortex interdependencies etc.
(Don't take this if you're HIV-positive, have COVID, or are otherwise immunocompromised.)
Phosphatidylserine aka PS \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
For sharper prefrontal cortex activity and giving your amygdala a six-pack. Only take it if you want to be even smarter than you already are.
Get a sunflower-derived variety if possible.
(Don't take this if you're on blood-thinners.)
Vitamin B! \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Especially B-9 (aka Folate) and B-12 (aka Folic Acid aka Cobalamin).
Tons of suicidally depressed people feel relieved when they supplement L-methylfolate aka LMF, which is the "activated" form of b9 that crosses the blood-brain barrier.
I wish every clinician understood that this should be their first move for patients who don't respond to SSRIs. Let alone tricyclics, antipsychotics etc. Fucking methylated B9.
Folate deficiency doesn't cause depression so much as it prevents recovery. You're here to recover, right? Me too. Take this.
Too many people also suffer from depression because of b-12 deficiency (esp vegans and vegetarians), but eating a delicious bcomplex gummy will clean their lenses.
Also, did you know that B-6 (aka Pyridoxine) will help you create more memorable dreams? (Sidetrack recipe for maximum dream vividness: sleep deprivation × b6 deprivation followed by a bunch of b6 before a full night's sleep = holy smokes!)
EPAs and other Omega-3s \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Most Omega-3 supplements feature way more DHA than EPA, but we're here to prevent suicide, so focus on getting close to 1,000mg of EPA daily.
(It used to be difficult to source vegan EPA since it was mostly derived from fish, but now it's just as commonly cultivated from plants. All of these recommendations are vegan!)
Vitamin D3 \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Will "modulate oxydative stress in the brain" ie it eases depression whether or not you have the kind of cholecalciferol deficiency which is the root of many people's major depression.
Just my opinion but most people should supplement D3 anyway, regardless of their relationship with the desire to self-murder.
Choline \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
A seven-year study on choline supplementation concluded that "dietary choline was significantly associated with a lower risk of depressive symptoms". Other clinical studies more typically associate choline with the treatment of anxiety than depression. Some individuals have found that taking extra choline makes things worse! I was willing to try everything and found this was a good fit for me. At worst, it'll cost you a few bucks and a day of feeling worse.
Simple Pain Relievers like Aspirin or Tylenol: \\\\\
Most depressed bodies crank up their cortisol production during anxious or sad intervals and this fucking sucks to experience. Cortisol concentrations in the blood and urine of suicidal patients are off the charts. If you're like physically hurting, take some goddamn tylenol or aspirin. It might seem kindof, idk, "extra" or something since you're not treating a headache or a sprained ankle, but look: it's harmless relief when your stuff hurts the worst. It's cheap, it's available. Don't suffer needlessly, ok?
FOR GENTS \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Sorry, ladies, I just don't know what it's like to be you. I don't know much period, but I do know that the ones listed above are great no matter who might be taking them.
Fenugreek - It's just an herb. Used to be associated with lactation haha but fenugreek has insane concentrations of 4-HI (aka 4-hydroxyisoleucine) which can fundamentally alter your regulation of seratonin. I wouldn't fuck with this if I were taking any rx meds though, since it has (rarely!) been a factor in instances of "seratonin syndrome". Just an herb, right? haha One of the best and most reliable ways of boosting free testosterone in your bloodstream, which just feels good. It's dirt cheap, too.
L-Carnitine - There are two varieties. The "Tartrate" variety enhances athletic performance and is associated with fitness and weight loss. The "Acetyl" variety helps against depression. They're both gonna help you.
Zinc - Gains strength at the root of your life force (causes you to feel more uhh frisky). Have you seen those videos of zinc sparks exploding around the zygote at the moment of conception? Zinc is the ignition catalyst of the human soul, it's not a joke. Maybe save this for when you're really ready to return because you wouldn't want to spark before you're ready to live again.
Branch Chain Amino Acids aka BCAAs but especially L-Leucine - and lift heavy stuff, anything, a bunch of times repeatedly, every day. Even if it doesn't eliminate your desire to die, you're gonna know yourself more fully, you'll (re)discover your ability to grow and improve, which is fundamental to recovering from suicidal depression; once you know you can get actually, tangibly, evidently better at something (even something as dumb as, say, lifting water bottles in a backpack), you'll have proof that the future you just might have a better shot at life than you had in the past (and you'll like the way your body starts to look). There are tons of research findings on how "resistance training" help with depression, but they all seem to leave out the essential, poetic, harmony between muscular hypertrophy and the psychic trauma of suicidal crises. Going through it, pushing on despite the pain and the tearing and the damage, really actually materially does create beautiful growth, new and better expressions of who we are.
////////////
Obviously the stuff making any of us feel like killing ourselves wasn't nutritional or "embodied", exactly — hopelessness and heartbreak aren't material that way, they're intangible. Vitamins won't give you a reason to live, etc. However you might (re)discover that, armed with these and other tools for rebuilding what you are, new possibilities emerge and the stuff you lost isn't as important as what's still really out there.
5-HTP aka 5-hydroxytryptophan \\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Putting this first because it rules.
You'll find oceans of other testimony about it online, so I'll spare you mine except to say it's stronger and more reliable than any rx I've tried and it's dirt cheap.
Some people experience this thing really differently, though, so pay close attention to your first reaction. Either way, it will surprise you.
SAM-e aka S-Adenosyl Methionine \\\\\\\\\\\\
Overlooked! How did I miss this one for so long?? Kicking myself.
Great across diagnoses, but a reliable win against THE DARKNESS WITHIN. Take it first thing in the marnin w your new 5-HTP and some coffee and you'll be kicking some ass.
Magnesium Citrate \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
A big jar of these gummies is like ten bucks and they're like candy. But when have twizzlers or haribo gummy bears made you feel more alive?
Not everybody's depression results from an intraneuronal magnesium deficit — maybe yours is? Even if not, it reliably alleviates anxiety in almost everybody.
Strangely good for vision disorders too, ie visual cortex interdependencies etc.
(Don't take this if you're HIV-positive, have COVID, or are otherwise immunocompromised.)
Phosphatidylserine aka PS \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
For sharper prefrontal cortex activity and giving your amygdala a six-pack. Only take it if you want to be even smarter than you already are.
Get a sunflower-derived variety if possible.
(Don't take this if you're on blood-thinners.)
Vitamin B! \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Especially B-9 (aka Folate) and B-12 (aka Folic Acid aka Cobalamin).
Tons of suicidally depressed people feel relieved when they supplement L-methylfolate aka LMF, which is the "activated" form of b9 that crosses the blood-brain barrier.
I wish every clinician understood that this should be their first move for patients who don't respond to SSRIs. Let alone tricyclics, antipsychotics etc. Fucking methylated B9.
Folate deficiency doesn't cause depression so much as it prevents recovery. You're here to recover, right? Me too. Take this.
Too many people also suffer from depression because of b-12 deficiency (esp vegans and vegetarians), but eating a delicious bcomplex gummy will clean their lenses.
Also, did you know that B-6 (aka Pyridoxine) will help you create more memorable dreams? (Sidetrack recipe for maximum dream vividness: sleep deprivation × b6 deprivation followed by a bunch of b6 before a full night's sleep = holy smokes!)
EPAs and other Omega-3s \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Most Omega-3 supplements feature way more DHA than EPA, but we're here to prevent suicide, so focus on getting close to 1,000mg of EPA daily.
(It used to be difficult to source vegan EPA since it was mostly derived from fish, but now it's just as commonly cultivated from plants. All of these recommendations are vegan!)
Vitamin D3 \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Will "modulate oxydative stress in the brain" ie it eases depression whether or not you have the kind of cholecalciferol deficiency which is the root of many people's major depression.
Just my opinion but most people should supplement D3 anyway, regardless of their relationship with the desire to self-murder.
Choline \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
A seven-year study on choline supplementation concluded that "dietary choline was significantly associated with a lower risk of depressive symptoms". Other clinical studies more typically associate choline with the treatment of anxiety than depression. Some individuals have found that taking extra choline makes things worse! I was willing to try everything and found this was a good fit for me. At worst, it'll cost you a few bucks and a day of feeling worse.
Simple Pain Relievers like Aspirin or Tylenol: \\\\\
Most depressed bodies crank up their cortisol production during anxious or sad intervals and this fucking sucks to experience. Cortisol concentrations in the blood and urine of suicidal patients are off the charts. If you're like physically hurting, take some goddamn tylenol or aspirin. It might seem kindof, idk, "extra" or something since you're not treating a headache or a sprained ankle, but look: it's harmless relief when your stuff hurts the worst. It's cheap, it's available. Don't suffer needlessly, ok?
FOR GENTS \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
Sorry, ladies, I just don't know what it's like to be you. I don't know much period, but I do know that the ones listed above are great no matter who might be taking them.
Fenugreek - It's just an herb. Used to be associated with lactation haha but fenugreek has insane concentrations of 4-HI (aka 4-hydroxyisoleucine) which can fundamentally alter your regulation of seratonin. I wouldn't fuck with this if I were taking any rx meds though, since it has (rarely!) been a factor in instances of "seratonin syndrome". Just an herb, right? haha One of the best and most reliable ways of boosting free testosterone in your bloodstream, which just feels good. It's dirt cheap, too.
L-Carnitine - There are two varieties. The "Tartrate" variety enhances athletic performance and is associated with fitness and weight loss. The "Acetyl" variety helps against depression. They're both gonna help you.
Zinc - Gains strength at the root of your life force (causes you to feel more uhh frisky). Have you seen those videos of zinc sparks exploding around the zygote at the moment of conception? Zinc is the ignition catalyst of the human soul, it's not a joke. Maybe save this for when you're really ready to return because you wouldn't want to spark before you're ready to live again.
Branch Chain Amino Acids aka BCAAs but especially L-Leucine - and lift heavy stuff, anything, a bunch of times repeatedly, every day. Even if it doesn't eliminate your desire to die, you're gonna know yourself more fully, you'll (re)discover your ability to grow and improve, which is fundamental to recovering from suicidal depression; once you know you can get actually, tangibly, evidently better at something (even something as dumb as, say, lifting water bottles in a backpack), you'll have proof that the future you just might have a better shot at life than you had in the past (and you'll like the way your body starts to look). There are tons of research findings on how "resistance training" help with depression, but they all seem to leave out the essential, poetic, harmony between muscular hypertrophy and the psychic trauma of suicidal crises. Going through it, pushing on despite the pain and the tearing and the damage, really actually materially does create beautiful growth, new and better expressions of who we are.
////////////
Obviously the stuff making any of us feel like killing ourselves wasn't nutritional or "embodied", exactly — hopelessness and heartbreak aren't material that way, they're intangible. Vitamins won't give you a reason to live, etc. However you might (re)discover that, armed with these and other tools for rebuilding what you are, new possibilities emerge and the stuff you lost isn't as important as what's still really out there.
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