I see cues in everything. Especially sexual cues. If I'm having a conversation with someone and they say "you don't get it", it feels like they are talking about sex (as in I don't get sex). If someone moves their hand or fingers in a certain way it feels like they're doing it to allude to a sexual motion or act. I know these things are aren't real, but it makes it impossible to focus in conversations. I basically have to use my full concentration just to stay calm and look normal. Otherwise I get a strong urge to either tell the person to stop talking or I have to look away and grab my hair. It's fucking annoying. Like you would think it would stop because I know it's not real but no. Nature just won't stop fucking with you. This got especially worse when I started smoking weed, and I was an asshat for smoking it despite getting seriously bad side effects like this. Oh well, I was loney and deperate for attention and wanted to fit in back then, and wanted to be "cool". Also I think porn plays a big part, I'm currently trying to quit, its been a couple of days since I stopped. Hopefully I won't go back to it. It doesn't even feel good anymore. I don't even get horny properly, and I'm only 20 years old. It just became a habit, a habit that's been a daily part of half my life. I'm going to start going to the gym tomorrow probably, just like I used to 3 times previously. Let's see how that turns out. If anyone has an opinion or advice feel free to share.
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Try get sober (including weed) no matter how shitty it feels. What you call "sexual cues" is probably only half delusion
I mean you're 20yo... Seriously try get clean and sober before you end up like me :-) drugs worsen mental illness and I'm writing this as so. diagnosed with depression, bpd and once psychosis (2010)... Don't waste your youth
I mean you're 20yo... Seriously try get clean and sober before you end up like me :-) drugs worsen mental illness and I'm writing this as so. diagnosed with depression, bpd and once psychosis (2010)... Don't waste your youth
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What do you mean "only half delusion". Do you mean there might be truth behind them. I know for a fact there isn't.
Porn really sickens your mind, specially hardcore porn, try to stop watching, your mind really heals, or go lowering the "hardness" of the porn, for example watching gifs, images of girls or simple pov porn instead of gangbang or gloryhole porn, I have been 6 months into nofap a few years ago, and I was really different, i'd be with friends and they'd talk nasty about a girl, and normally i'd imagine easily, but during that period I was more apathetic to that, and the urge of stimulating myself just stopped appearing, not only that but those were my gym days and I was really productive.
Also weed really gets you immersed in things, those are the bad guys, I can't say much cause I do both with no regrets, but it's good to point out that they might slowly fuck you over time
Also weed really gets you immersed in things, those are the bad guys, I can't say much cause I do both with no regrets, but it's good to point out that they might slowly fuck you over time
Yes sorry that was weirdly put.. I shouldnt post when drunk. What you described does sound psychotic. Hope you get better by quitting weed and porn.
Yeah I've quit weed, its been over a year now, I'm quitting porn now, I'm not sure if I can still masterbate though or if that is bad too.
porn definitely messed you up. Quit porn or else you will lose your life. It took me 4 months of not watching porn and not fapping to heal. Weed will make you weak so i suggest to stop weed also.
GodKnows
What lies ahead
- Jun 28, 2018
- 119
I used to be a porn addict, like 10 years of regularly masturbating to porn. Then I made a decision to stop with porn and fap.
And then I became addicted to escorts.
And then I became addicted to escorts.
How is it now? Is that a problem for you? Would you say it was better back then or now?
I feel like things only fuck with you as much as you let them. The weed certainly won't help the issues in your case. I used to fret over porn use, but still view it (even really hardcore fetish shit) and don't let it bother me. It's all about controlling and understanding your own thoughts. Look into Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. It's not a miracle worker, but helps you understand your own thoughts a bit better.
Jacking off with your imagination is way healthier than using porn.
GodKnows
What lies ahead
- Jun 28, 2018
- 119
