Quit my job and have been doing nothing for months, now suddenly I've enrolled myself in post secondary education. Never done this before. My earlier school record shows a direct correlation between attending a physical school and my marks suffering. It's only when I was doing distance learning that I was able to get good grades. Though if I want to get a diploma that matters I have to attend a physical school now. My social anxiety is at an all time high because of this. One of the classes I had to register in is literally just teaching us how to work in groups. Have to go down to the student service centre tomorrow morning to get a confirmation of enrollment so that I can get at my RESP money and be able to pay my tuition before the deadline. It's not even the financial stress or academic stress that I'm worried about, I'm really only worried about being around peers and staff so often. There are two clubs that are exclusively for people in my program to join, and then there's also a bunch of other clubs which relate to interests I have. It is unbelievably frustrating that I am this scared to join any clubs, eat lunch with anyone, or have anyone talk to me for quite literally any reason at all. Am I about to crash and burn? Isn't it obvious?
You are in a good position, despite all of your self doubts. Taking all of the steps to enroll in school and get your financial aid in preparation to earn your degree wasn't easy for you, I can assume, in light of knowing what social situations awaited you. But nevertheless you did it because you value your education and want it. I really respect that and think that you should move forward the best you can.
From my experience, people don't really tend to reach out in college classes; they pretty much keep to themselves. When I was attending I actually tried to seek out study partners/friends and found most students not emotionally available and/or not having the drive or desire to dive deeper into the subject matter being covered in the classes. I always wanted to find someone passionate and well-adjusted that should like to study, debate, and discuss with me, giving us both the opportunity to derive more pleasure and understanding from our studies. I never found such a person. The professors, at my school at least, were largely indifferent as well. If you were clearly suffering from some extenuating circumstance, unknown to them (which I personally was), they would not approach you about it. If you were struggling to attend and turn in work, they would just assume you were lazy and didn't care. They never reached out to see if you were okay.
In all the semesters I attended, amidst all the horrors I endured in college which negatively impacted my performance, I was only ever reached out to twice. The one professor was a very kind old man who was tenured and empathetic. He was old school and proved to be an exception amongst the staff there. The other who reached out to me was an inspiring, philosophically-minded adjunct prof who truly cared and desired to make an impact on his students. His message reaching out to me actually stunned me. We proceeded to become close friends after I completed his course. I loved him dearly. But anyways, I don't think people will bother you much, which can be a good thing. The flip side to that though is that if you start slipping and find going to physical classes a serious stress and struggle, there won't be anyone looking out for you... unless you happen upon a beautiful exception of an instructor or fellow classmate.
Seriously though, I wish you the very best of luck and encourage you to try to follow through. Keep in mind that you are likely not the only one dreading the group work class. Your first day you should try to gauge the other students in your class and look for introverted people who will share your anxieties/dread. If you are able to choose your groups, you can gravitate to those kind of people in the same emotional/mental boat. If your professor assigns the groups, then chances are you will at least have one introverted/reluctant person in your midst. Exchange numbers with them and you guys can help each other out, especially if the other people in your group kind of suck!
