problems with obsession

[painfulwords]

I thought a lot about committing thousands of times because of my problem with obsession over people. Plus, I'm dealing with a lot of problems, feeling a sense of void and stressing SO MUCH, but my obsession is on top of everything. It ruins my day, my thoughts are only toward this. How do I deal with it?

 

[JustAnx]

Accept that things will happen and you can do nothing about it.
Try to focus only on things that you are SURE you can control.

I also deal with obsession and eventho im no where near of solving my issue i know that what i mentioned is the only way to work on it.

 

[Vivir_O_No]

I thought a lot about committing thousands of times because of my problem with obsession over people. Plus, I'm dealing with a lot of problems, feeling a sense of void and stressing SO MUCH, but my obsession is on top of everything. It ruins my day, my thoughts are only toward this. How do I deal with it?

Limerence? It always happens to me...

 

[Forever Sleep]

Is it Limerence- like @Vivir_O_No suggested? I'm pretty sure I suffer with that too. I'm very strict with myself now. I do my best to nip it in the bud. If/when I can feel myself starting to obsess over someone, I tell myself this is just something I do. It isn't real and it's likely to make me very unhappy in the long run. Plus, I try very hard not to fantasize about them romantically/sexually. It tends to be that that keeps it all very intense.

I've found becoming limerent over fictional characters/actors etc. isn't quite so bad. So, that's where I tend to dump these feelings now.

 

[Vivir_O_No]

Is it Limerence- like @Vivir_O_No suggested? I'm pretty sure I suffer with that too. I'm very strict with myself now. I do my best to nip it in the bud. If/when I can feel myself starting to obsess over someone, I tell myself this is just something I do. It isn't real and it's likely to make me very unhappy in the long run. Plus, I try very hard not to fantasize about them romantically/sexually. It tends to be that that keeps it all very intense.

I've found becoming limerent over fictional characters/actors etc. isn't quite so bad. So, that's where I tend to dump these feelings now.

How much does it last for you? In my case, it tends to go away after one or two years...

 

[Forever Sleep]

How much does it last for you? In my case, it tends to go away after one or two years...

I'd say maybe 3 years to feel nothing much towards them after forcing myself to stop liking them. My longest limerent crush was around 7 years though. What a complete waste of time and energy! I must have been caught up in various limerent crushes for maybe 15 years before I realised what was going on. Are you better with them now? I feel like, identifying them for what they were and being aware of the tendency in me helped calm things down.

 

[Innereye]

Limerence is a nightmare. Restoring accurate reality testing is imperative, Trace back the feelings you're projecting on their idea back to yourself.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I've never heard of limerence, but this describes me perfectly. I'm utterly obsessed with getting people's attention and holding it. I try to reign it in, and it helps when I have one or two people giving me emotional validity. But I'm just now realizing how unhealthy this might be. I would do most anything for someone who will just talk to be and make me feel wanted. I'm ashamed to disclose at what lengths I've gone, and it really doesn't matter who it is; I just always crave that emotional connection. It's like I need someone to breath with me because I struggle to do so on my own.

I really don't like feeling empty and lonely. I will do anything to hold someone's positive attention. But I can become emotionally unstable if I feel like I'm not getting the affirmation I want. It's scary how I don't have control over it. I thought it was just normal emotional up and downs, but if it's not, then idk what I'm going to do. I feel vulnerable a lot, want to love a lot, and just end up hurting and feeling hurt when it isn't enough. This sucks.

Tmi, but I blew a good friendship because I was so emotionally distraught. I need to rethink a lot of things. But in the meantime I still feel like my emotional needs are spilling out of me with no one good enough to fulfill them. I'll still try to do anything for anyone while hating myself for being so pathetic and used.