Venting shytttttttt yap

[bnkshawty]

ive been oversexualized by others and myself since a very young age ive "Developed" hips and gained attraction from boys and grown ahh men this alone isnt what fuckedf me up sm in life it was also the religion and culture i came from that raised me to feel ashamed of myself when i want to enhance my attraction not cz its a sin but rather cz men cant be controlled. ive dealt with male harrassment sm my entire life especially in the country im in rn for "vacation" i went to a kids amusment park and a worker grabbed my tits while Fastening my seatbelt for me and the void in me dug so much deeper. ive gotten so fucked in my brain to the point now when i do my makeup and hair and try to get cute i feel like a fucking ugly ogre even when my surroundings call me attractive i feel disgusting i js want to cut myself and rot in my bed idk whats wrong w me that has led me to this point i have no identity im not real ts im js rambling thots rn i dont rlly have no one to talk 2 about these thots js deadass going crazy ts. i dont feel attractive i feel like a pig. i hate harassments from grown men and my family basically calling me a hoe i rmemeber one time i discussed tis topic w my dad and mom how in the place im at rn men bother me on the streets my dad had said "its like how flies are attracted to trash" which i couldnt even forget ever is that what i am fr js shit lamolmaolmaolmao i feel so overstimulated rn i think i hate being percieved i js want to be a angel far away from the earth and not be percieved js enjoying my own pure existence
oh and i got back w my ex lmao #thirdtimesacharm