Help SN blood photo request - no links to click - don’t have digital privacy

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Hi
I think I have to give in & test my SN tomorrow because I can't take the anxiety of it not being legit anymore & need to order a back up immediately. Time crunch.
I need help though…
I plan to do both blood test & aquarium test at same time. I couldn't get the Exit test & I panic bought a test strip kit & hid it & I'm not sure how to do but hopefully it's a good one & does what it's supposed to & I don't fuck it up. I'm not great at math & science & instruction manuals in general - my brain does not work that way.
I tried to cut myself today but couldn't do. I saw someone on here mentioning diabetic lancing so I went to the pharmacy but they had it behind the counter so I just panic bought that too - told them I was sent to get it.
My main problem though is the blood photos & my privacy issues - I'm on an iPhone only, my ex is still in my business, I don't have any other access to tech & he's just everywhere. I can see that there's pics in the Bible but you have to click spoilers. I saw other people post links to pics, which I don't want to click at all, just too scared. So I typed in the name of each of those pic sources & they don't come up in search. So it's click links or nothing as far as I can see. I read the descriptions about muddy brown but really need to see photos.
I can't click anything. Anything.
It's not safe for me.
If anyone can post pics on here or send to me privately, please do. They don't have to be your own, just the ones from the Bible & all the other blood clicking links - there seems like quite a few, but all involve clicking.
If I had access to any other tech, I'd do this myself. I'm not being lazy or stupid. Just trying to keep myself safe until I CTB.
If anyone can help, please do.
Please. I can't even describe the desperation.

 

[razahcareca27]

if you click on the spoiler button you won't be downloading anything, as far as the spoiler ain't a link and you click on it (two clicks). I remember some threads here that I didn't had to download anything, neither open any link. it was just in the thread. I think one of the correct searchs for it would be TEST + SN

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

Thanks. I can see there's a thread called
"How much blood is needed for SN test?" & someone posted a link called
"Blood test with sn pics inside"
Which sounds ideal. Like, exactly what I'm looking for…
But that thread doesn't come up in search bar & I am really operating out of fear here - every time i think I've got him out of my tech, he's still finding ways to get access - he's a tech genius, I know nothing, I don't live close to Apple geniuses. I've done what I can but he's being far too clever for me. It's just not safe for me to take risks. And I have no other resources. It's awful. But thank you.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/bloodtest-for-sn-results.149660/

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/blood-test.102777/


https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-blood-test-by-yours-truly-nsfw.101215/#post-1746902

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-megathread.1156/page-319#post-1737567

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/...my-sn-and-blood-tested-it.99649/#post-1726304


https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/my-sn-testing-w-pics.95355/#post-1671746

Enough?

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/bloodtest-for-sn-results.149660/

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/blood-test.102777/


https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-blood-test-by-yours-truly-nsfw.101215/#post-1746902

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-megathread.1156/page-319#post-1737567

https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/...my-sn-and-blood-tested-it.99649/#post-1726304


https://www.sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/my-sn-testing-w-pics.95355/#post-1671746

Enough?

Oh my golly!!! Thanks so much!!! I'm not overstating how shit I am at tech or how watched I am. I'll be brutally honest because if I can't here, then where??? I saw your post when I was in bed & first woke up & (I'm sorry), I thought you missed the point about me not wanting to hit purple links. And then I had a coffee… And reread it & realised what a fucking idiot I was. I'm sorry I am just that stupid at tech stuff. So I wrote down all the links & typed them manually into my phone & got most of the pics & enough info to go ahead. I had hoped enough time to do aquarium as well, but nearly got busted as it was. I cannot believe I used to be an adrenaline junkie. Now every time I nearly get caught I think my chest is gonna explode. And like, for the rest of the day…. More proof today that he's still in my tech somehow. I'm beginning to think maybe I don't have to worry about being caught, that he knows I'm here & is happy about it. That's grim as fuck. I dunno. But the point is, I managed to do 2 tests at the same time, 1 where I poured blood into SN & 1 where I poured SN into blood. I used the lancing device someone mentioned. Both turned Hersheys chocolate brown immediately. Looked like all the photos.
Thank you so so so much.
I can't tell if your parting shot about "enough?" was offering more help or sassing me, but I had such success & am so so grateful, you may sass me all you want!!

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Oh my golly!!! Thanks so much!!! I'm not overstating how shit I am at tech or how watched I am. I'll be brutally honest because if I can't here, then where??? I saw your post when I was in bed & first woke up & (I'm sorry), I thought you missed the point about me not wanting to hit purple links. And then I had a coffee… And reread it & realised what a fucking idiot I was. I'm sorry I am just that stupid at tech stuff. So I wrote down all the links & typed them manually into my phone & got most of the pics & enough info to go ahead. I had hoped enough time to do aquarium as well, but nearly got busted as it was. I cannot believe I used to be an adrenaline junkie. Now every time I nearly get caught I think my chest is gonna explode. And like, for the rest of the day…. More proof today that he's still in my tech somehow. I'm beginning to think maybe I don't have to worry about being caught, that he knows I'm here & is happy about it. That's grim as fuck. I dunno. But the point is, I managed to do 2 tests at the same time, 1 where I poured blood into SN & 1 where I poured SN into blood. I used the lancing device someone mentioned. Both turned Hersheys chocolate brown immediately. Looked like all the photos.
Thank you so so so much.
I can't tell if your parting shot about "enough?" was offering more help or sassing me, but I had such success & am so so grateful, you may sass me all you want!!

YW. Ha. I did miss your statement about not posting links, maybe didn't completely get it. If your husband, bf, whatever put something on your phone, I think it would be something to watch whatever you do, including anything you view, even pictures, anything you type (keystroke logger), whatever sites you visit. Typing in addresses wouldn't thwart that.

You could have responded back and asked me to just paste the pics in this thread and I would have. Personally, I don't think it would have done you much good if he is as clever as you say. Do you have any libraries you can visit and use their equipment?

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

YW. Ha. I did miss your statement about not posting links, maybe didn't completely get it. If your husband, bf, whatever put something on your phone, I think it would be something to watch whatever you do, including anything you view, even pictures, anything you type (keystroke logger), whatever sites you visit. Typing in addresses wouldn't thwart that.

You could have responded back and asked me to just paste the pics in this thread and I would have. Personally, I don't think it would have done you much good if he is as clever as you say. Do you have any libraries you can visit and use their equipment?

Small community where everyone knows everyone. My time is not my own. I'm going to have a look at some new coffee shops near my work, see if they have tables out the back facing forward. I'll need pen & paper because I can't save anything. I'll have to lie & say my shifts were extended & hope I don't get busted by someone saying they saw me. And say payroll error if he questions missing pay. He is exceptional at tech, no getting around it. I'm exceptionally poor at tech, no getting around it. I use proton vpn on the private pages on my iPhone & set up an email account that I think he doesn't know about - I've never told him about it & he uses vpn's but he's never mentioned proton. I don't know what I don't know though. I check the downloads on my phone & it "seems" like nothing is popping up, at all, & looks like not going to cloud as well as the Adobe app but if he knows my new password he could change those settings. I've tried to set up as much as possible with Face ID. I'm doing my best but I know I have a million blind spots. That's why I'm so terrified to clink any links - people say he "probably shouldn't" be able to see - I can assure you that that is not enough for me. There are consequences. My CTB date moved forward a few times & I've been really disheartened but testing the SN feels like it's propelling me forward again. I still want to do aquarium test & soon, but if I don't get a chance, I will definitely do it & redo the blood test before I try to catch the one bus I can't afford to miss.
Again, he is not the sole reason for anyone thinking I'm "just" trapped by his abuse. I don't know why I'm defending him though - as someone who has spent almost 50 years avoiding the "hate" word about people, tried so hard, even when deserved, but I think I do actually hate him for what he's done to me. The abuse is insidious, when it started I thought I was imagining it because he's known for being a nice guy, because he gaslit me into believing it was all in my head. There's nothing subtle or in my head now. It's most definitely undeniable & frequent & that sucks. But moving out is just such a time wasting & expensive exercise - pulling apart decades of life together, decades of belongings, all the cleaning!! I know I'm not changing my mind about CTB - even if I won a zillion dollars, there's too much else going on.
CTB FTW!!
Thanks for the accidental help - all help is help & I've never needed help like I do now.
And the constant begging is disgusting.
I'm genuinely sorry to any & all who are annoyed by my complete inability to do this by myself….

 

[DOHARDTHINGS24]

PS he went through my bathroom rubbish last night. Didn't try to hide it - did it in front of me. He didn't say why or what he was looking for. I hadn't seriously (on a conscious level) that he would do that but I must've had an inkling somewhere - I've been getting rid of stuff in unusual ways & trying to be clever & I'm just so glad I was - yesterday when I took the SN out to do the blood test, I destroyed all of the DMC packaging - L was so unbelievably kind to me, just no words - & I even though it'll be obvious that it was SN, I've destroyed every link to DMC & know that there's no link in my banking to him. I cut up all the Ukraine stuff in a way that could never be found in a place it can never be found to be disposed in a way that can never be found. I'm extremely proud of that decision & the timing of it. But who the fuck emptied out someone's rubbish in front of them & goes through it. I know it's minor compared to the rest of what he does but I just want to point out it's not paranoia if it's real - I can't remember the Nirvana song, but I think it's something like just because you're paranoid don't mean they're not after you…something like that anyway.
I hope he was pleased with his findings of used dental floss & band aids & toiletries packaging.