Venting so tired

[killmesoftly]

idk whats wrong with me I had such a good day yesterday and today I spent about 5-6 hours on this forum self sabotaging that good feeling. I just know it won't last and I'm tired of being disappointed when the sadness rolls back around so I'm planning on it happening, forcing it even by reading all this. I'm so tired, hungry and need to shower but I'm so morbidly obsessed with researching my preferred methods and deciding what to choose, it's become my new obsession (adhd and autistic so you know i'm knee deep in the obsession). thinking about SN or inert gas, i have so many thoughts on this and so much to say but it will be a novel if I write them all and I've already wrote so many ppl long responses today, I feel like I'm just flooding the site and annoying people but my brain moves so fast and the topic is consuming my brain, it's so annoying. I'm just going to try to log out and eat and sleep and shower for the night and stop thinking about CBT, please wish me luck.