Venting Still waiting…

[BlueButterfly111]

Omg, I can't believe it, but I'm still waiting for my Sn to arrive in the U.S. after almost a month and a half. I'm honestly starting to think it's not going to show up. I will try to reorder it again, if it doesn't show up this month, if not I will try to reorder it at the beginning of next month. I've been suffering so much.

It's just so unfair, I just want to die, I'm grieving so much over losing my dead boyfriend, why won't the universe just let me go be with him? I've seen so many posts of people only getting theirs after a few weeks? I feel like a fucking cursed human. Like PLEASE just let me fucking die! Can someone please help me cope with this? I'm tired of being alive, tired of suffering.

 

[deadbidaylight]

Is SN the only way you would consider CTB? There's lots of other methods out there that don't require waiting if you are in that much agony.

 

[depressedinsomniac]

source dmc? what does tracking say?

 

[BlueButterfly111]

Is SN the only way you would consider CTB? There's lots of other methods out there that don't require waiting if you are in that much agony.

No, it isn't my only way, but it was my first, and most painless method. I really still want to ctb with this method, so I will try again a couple of times, maybe if I have to, with different sources. But if I have to, by the end of this year, I would try a different method. The only other method that I was going to do was drowning. I could try a gun, but I don't have one, and I'm really scared to pull the trigger. I just want the Sn to arrive so I can be with my dead boyfriend again, I love and miss him so much. I'm so tired of being alive and suffering!

source dmc? what does tracking say?

Yes it's DMC. Many people said that it arrived in less than two weeks, but I've been waiting for a month and a half. The tracking always says, since February 14th, "Your package will arrive later than expected, but it is still on its way. It's is currently in transit to the next facility." I think that means that they don't know exactly where it is. Like I said, if it doesn't come this month, then I will try to reorder it at the beginning of next month.

 

[ventingfrustrations]

Omg, I can't believe it, but I'm still waiting for my Sn to arrive in the U.S. after almost a month and a half. I'm honestly starting to think it's not going to show up. I will try to reorder it again, if it doesn't show up this month, if not I will try to reorder it at the beginning of next month. I've been suffering so much.

It's just so unfair, I just want to die, I'm grieving so much over losing my dead boyfriend, why won't the universe just let me go be with him? I've seen so many posts of people only getting theirs after a few weeks? I feel like a fucking cursed human. Like PLEASE just let me fucking die! Can someone please help me cope with this? I'm tired of being alive, tired of suffering.

I'm sorry you are suffering and have seen your pain through your messages it is very clear you are in pain I hope you find peace

 

[BlueButterfly111]

I'm sorry you are suffering and have seen your pain through your messages it is very clear you are in pain I hope you find peace

Thank you so much for saying that

 

[ventingfrustrations]

Thank you so much for saying that

You're welcome I'm on here most times because I'm on the severe depression arc so I guess I pass the time of my existence trying to support and vent and cry and then just be and exist because I can only work DoorDash bike for so long as my legs are sore so I have to take a day off today and then tomorrow I have to get groceries

 

[Tombs_in_your_eyes]

Waiting so long must be extremely frustrating. There's peace of mind in having SN to hand - a feeling of control over when to end things - that you just don't have at all when it's stuck in transit. I can really feel the despair in your post. You must be feeling really powerless and trapped.

Sending you a gentle hug. I know too well the pain of living after your person has died.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

I'm so sorry. I hope it comes soon. <3

 

[BlueButterfly111]

I'm so sorry. I hope it comes soon. <3

Thank you me too.

 

[Odd socks]

Is SN the only way you would consider CTB? There's lots of other methods out there that don't require waiting if you are in that much agony.

What sort of viable reliable methods are there. I have tried to overdose twice taking huge amounts of a cock tail of drugs. Each time I was found. Put in a comma and survived. I worry if I survive I will end up worse off with say brain damage.

 

[Halfhourdays]

Is SN the only way you would consider CTB? There's lots of other methods out there that don't require waiting if you are in that much agony.

Are there any good options for poison/OD not found in the PPeH?

alt.suicide.holiday used to have so many more options and methods...

 

[deadbidaylight]

ODing is a tough one because most OTC meds are designed not to kill you. Opioids are really the only option that could have a higher guarantee of lethality.

 

[DarknessWave]

I am so sorry for all your suffering, I hope the SN arrives soon so you can be with him.

 

[BlueButterfly111]

I am so sorry for all your suffering, I hope the SN arrives soon so you can be with him.

Thank you so much I really appreciate that, me too!

 

[opheliaoveragain]

so sorry to hear it's caught up like that. don't give up hope. we're here for you

 

[restlesseyes]

Thank you so much I really appreciate that, me too!

did you try to message the guy from DMC about your situation from what i heard i don't think that he sends a new one for free but offers a cheaper price and a higher quantity then normal

 

[BlueButterfly111]

did you try to message the guy from DMC about your situation from what i heard i don't think that he sends a new one for free but offers a cheaper price and a higher quantity then normal

Yeah I did last night actually. He said that I will have to reorder, but he won't make me have to pay the full price again.