Story Surpassing your narcissistic parents...

[FailGirl]

I hate a lot of people, specifically a lot of people in my family, and my mother is one of them. I try not to think about her, but, as of late, everything is reminding me of her.
It's a lot, so I'll keep it short, but I describe my mother as a hypocritical, narcissistic sadist. She's been mentally, physically, sexually, spiritually and financially abusive. Ever since the end of last year, after I called the police on her, then reported her to CPS for beating up my younger sister, I've been avoiding her. However, we live in the same area, so it's hard. A month ago, she caught me walking by, stopped me, talked to me and...

She asked me why I don't call her. I said it's because my phone isn't working, which is true, but the real reason is because I hate her. Obviously. Regardless, she asked me if I was going to get a job and I was like 'I don't know...' (I'm not because I live off of C&P from the VA, so I don't have to.) But she asked because 'bills are high'--like I don't know... Anyway, I cut it short because I needed (and wanted) to go.
It was awkward, but I felt vindicated. I keep in-contact with my sister, so I knew my mom was struggling. Even so, to hear it come out of her mouth, then complain about us not being in-contact, was beautiful. I don't feel vindicated because I want contact with my mom. I feel vindicated because I know she's struggling without me. Before I ran away, I told her that she makes my life harder and, screaming, she asked 'HOW DO I MAKE YOUR LIFE HARDER?!'

Life is hard, but it can be made much harder when you're dealing with narcissistic parents. I am throughly pleased with my mother's suffering.

 

[CatLvr]

I know JUST how you feel. My finest moment was leaving an "intervention" my narcissistic mother and her enabling husband and siblings staged because I was "getting out of hand". I was a single mom with a houseful of kids, two jobs and no help from anyone. In fact, I was quite the opposite, for the first time in my life I was actually handling shit and not failing because I refused "help" from my family -- the things she did like always needing to "borrow" my car right after payday (she knew I filled my tank up when I got pai) and bring it back empty. You know the story.

Anyway, I have never felt more free when I got up, gathered up my kids, got in my car and left. I saw them one more time -- at my grandson's funeral. And they were the same old vindictive, spiteful people and tried to use my grief to pull me back in.

I saw one of my sons many years after I left and he told me it was amazing how I hadn't seen nor contacted these people in 10 years and every time they got together for anything -- holidays, birthdays, etc. -- all they did was complain about how I had ruined their lives. Some things never change, I guess.

 

[Jdieiejdjaow]

Toxic people who don't take accountability and don't want to seek help to change require strong boundaries. It's good that you cut it short.

What happened to your sister after you made the report to CPS?.I'm surprised she's still living with the perpetrator.

 

[FailGirl]

Toxic people who don't take accountability and don't want to seek help to change require strong boundaries. It's good that you cut it short.

What happened to your sister after you made the report to CPS?.I'm surprised she's still living with the perpetrator.

She says our mom doesn't give her a hard time anymore. I guess CPS gave her a warning, which spooked her into acting better. I don't know. Technically, I didn't make the report. My sister's school did. (I told my sister's school about the incident, so they reported it to CPS.)