SinisterKid
Visionary
- Jun 1, 2019
- 2,113
It could read, day, week, month, year or decade. Life is like that, you just never know how long it is going to last.
My approach to life was influenced very early by a simple saying. A old teacher of mine from infant school days once told us a story about Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby. Do as you would be done by that would read if written correctly. Its a simple story of treating others in ways you would wish to be treated yourself. That is something which has stayed with me as I have tried to live the right way. I am generally nice to people and expect the same in return. But treat me badly, you will also receive the same in return. Sometimes, I am the one who treats someone else badly first. I am human and I fuck up from time to time, but the general principle has always been there. Treat others well and be treated well in return. It works for the most part.
Sadly, in this life, we will always find those who do not live life by anything remotely close to such principles. The internet appears to be crawling with them right now. I have certainly come across a few in this very forum. No compassion, no empathy, no understanding of the issues of others or their opinions and reasons for having such issues. Its like there is only one opinion or reason that counts, their own and fuck everyone else. OK, I can live with that. It takes all sorts. But some people are so forceful in the way they challenge anyone who dares to question them. They tend to be the types of people I take issue with in the real world and online. On the whole, I dont like bullies, but I am prepared to be one when I see what I perceive to be others forcing their opinions onto people who might not wish to engage them through fear. I have lived with fear, I know it and how it can control your life. To force someone to respect your opinion when you have no respect for theirs is not on in my eyes. Its usually exploiting someones fear of fighting back, something I am not usually bothered about, especially when angry.
There are a great many well informed people in this world and this forum. I have learnt a great deal since my arrival here, about a great deal of subjects, not just suicide. I have read, replied, laughed, cried and felt just about every emotion its possible to feel since I joined the ranks of the depressed and suicidal. I self depreciate, often. I have a low opinion of myself that is not always apparent. Its ok to call myself a freak, a ijit, a prick, but it is not OK for others who know nothing about me to call me the same. Oh sticks and stones and all that. I can take name calling, but not from self righteous fools who have nothing of worth to add to the debate, any debate that is in existence. Then when they also try to insinuate they are my intellectual better, which they most likely are, that riles me beyond the point of no return. I will stand firm and fight. The beauty is, I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times its happened of late. But it should not be happening here of all places at all. Someone pointed out to me that one of my very early responses here was verging on the judgemental. Upon reflection, they were right and I did take notice because I do not want others to see me as judgemental. I am my own worst critic for the most part. I do take offence sometimes when there is no need. As mentioned, I fuck up. In my altered mental state, its no wonder. The only wonder is, it doesn't happen more frequently.
This thread is posted under Recovery. That is possibly the most ambiguous term I have yet to come across. I have yet to find a explanation that fits my own interpretation of the term. It is so subjective. I am always looking to find ways to get back to where I used to be, to return to WHO I used to be. I have tried many ways to improve matters in my own mind and my own life. I read in the hopes that something, somewhere will act as a trigger for change, for the better. I am still looking. My mind is a myriad of conflicting views on the issue of recovery and what it can mean to be recovered. I am slowly coming towards the inevitable conclusion that recovery is almost damned near impossible in this world in its current state. I could go into glorious, long winded diatribes about the why's and wherefores of that particular problem, but I dont have forever and neither do you.
Reading someone here write, that their only regret was that a faggoty member was not yet dead, that was the straw that broke the camels back. If I responded to that in a way I would find acceptable, I would be banned from this place instantly. We all bitch and moan about the things that affect us. But in a forum such as this, to say that about someone else who is their own private hell is just going too far. I might have thought it about a couple of people here, but I could never actually voice those thoughts, in words or writing. And so, its brings me back to Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby. If that is how you treat your fellow human beings, I am not sure there is a place for you here. Its one of the problems of the internet and of the world. Fight your corner by all means, stand your ground if you feel you must, but to wish someone dead, that is uncalled for, its inhuman and you are not the type of person I want to spend any time around. I am trying to restore some of my lost faith in the human race, but sadly, people like you make it almost impossible and yes, sometimes, that needs to be said. Hopefully it wont detract from my search for meaning in recovery, but it sure as hell doesn't help.
Toodle Pip
My approach to life was influenced very early by a simple saying. A old teacher of mine from infant school days once told us a story about Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby. Do as you would be done by that would read if written correctly. Its a simple story of treating others in ways you would wish to be treated yourself. That is something which has stayed with me as I have tried to live the right way. I am generally nice to people and expect the same in return. But treat me badly, you will also receive the same in return. Sometimes, I am the one who treats someone else badly first. I am human and I fuck up from time to time, but the general principle has always been there. Treat others well and be treated well in return. It works for the most part.
Sadly, in this life, we will always find those who do not live life by anything remotely close to such principles. The internet appears to be crawling with them right now. I have certainly come across a few in this very forum. No compassion, no empathy, no understanding of the issues of others or their opinions and reasons for having such issues. Its like there is only one opinion or reason that counts, their own and fuck everyone else. OK, I can live with that. It takes all sorts. But some people are so forceful in the way they challenge anyone who dares to question them. They tend to be the types of people I take issue with in the real world and online. On the whole, I dont like bullies, but I am prepared to be one when I see what I perceive to be others forcing their opinions onto people who might not wish to engage them through fear. I have lived with fear, I know it and how it can control your life. To force someone to respect your opinion when you have no respect for theirs is not on in my eyes. Its usually exploiting someones fear of fighting back, something I am not usually bothered about, especially when angry.
There are a great many well informed people in this world and this forum. I have learnt a great deal since my arrival here, about a great deal of subjects, not just suicide. I have read, replied, laughed, cried and felt just about every emotion its possible to feel since I joined the ranks of the depressed and suicidal. I self depreciate, often. I have a low opinion of myself that is not always apparent. Its ok to call myself a freak, a ijit, a prick, but it is not OK for others who know nothing about me to call me the same. Oh sticks and stones and all that. I can take name calling, but not from self righteous fools who have nothing of worth to add to the debate, any debate that is in existence. Then when they also try to insinuate they are my intellectual better, which they most likely are, that riles me beyond the point of no return. I will stand firm and fight. The beauty is, I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times its happened of late. But it should not be happening here of all places at all. Someone pointed out to me that one of my very early responses here was verging on the judgemental. Upon reflection, they were right and I did take notice because I do not want others to see me as judgemental. I am my own worst critic for the most part. I do take offence sometimes when there is no need. As mentioned, I fuck up. In my altered mental state, its no wonder. The only wonder is, it doesn't happen more frequently.
This thread is posted under Recovery. That is possibly the most ambiguous term I have yet to come across. I have yet to find a explanation that fits my own interpretation of the term. It is so subjective. I am always looking to find ways to get back to where I used to be, to return to WHO I used to be. I have tried many ways to improve matters in my own mind and my own life. I read in the hopes that something, somewhere will act as a trigger for change, for the better. I am still looking. My mind is a myriad of conflicting views on the issue of recovery and what it can mean to be recovered. I am slowly coming towards the inevitable conclusion that recovery is almost damned near impossible in this world in its current state. I could go into glorious, long winded diatribes about the why's and wherefores of that particular problem, but I dont have forever and neither do you.
Reading someone here write, that their only regret was that a faggoty member was not yet dead, that was the straw that broke the camels back. If I responded to that in a way I would find acceptable, I would be banned from this place instantly. We all bitch and moan about the things that affect us. But in a forum such as this, to say that about someone else who is their own private hell is just going too far. I might have thought it about a couple of people here, but I could never actually voice those thoughts, in words or writing. And so, its brings me back to Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby. If that is how you treat your fellow human beings, I am not sure there is a place for you here. Its one of the problems of the internet and of the world. Fight your corner by all means, stand your ground if you feel you must, but to wish someone dead, that is uncalled for, its inhuman and you are not the type of person I want to spend any time around. I am trying to restore some of my lost faith in the human race, but sadly, people like you make it almost impossible and yes, sometimes, that needs to be said. Hopefully it wont detract from my search for meaning in recovery, but it sure as hell doesn't help.
Toodle Pip
