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- Feb 12, 2023
- 99
there are many inevitabilities that i just don't want to deal with in the future: working some job that i hate just so i can make enough money to barely survive, never having enough time to actually enjoy life... just one thing after another. a majority of adults are depressed, right? i don't know if i can live with this depression.
whenever i rant about those sorts of things, i'm met with the same responses of people just telling me "that's life"/"that's part of being an adult". why should i have to live miserably? people acknowledge these inevitabilities that make life so much worse, but can't seem to fathom why someone would want to ctb.
what, i should prolong this life with guaranteed depression and stress, proceed to live out my painful, lonely elderly years, then die anyways... just because that's what life is?
i see many young-ish people who start their careers and then immediately talk about looking forward to retirement. how bleak is that? committing to something that'll likely last for the majority of your lifetime, and already anticipating the end of it.
i don't see many people who have retired, anyways. most elderly people i've met are still working and will likely do so until they die because the economy is just that fucked up. it's such a sad existence. even if you do manage to retire... so what? a lifetime of struggling just for a few years of freedom and a bit of money? you'll likely be dealing with a plethora of health issues from the stress you had to deal with during your working years + the issues that come with old age... then you die. that's what this all leads up to? why should i live that life? why is that the adult thing to do? that life is not worth living, in my opinion.
choosing a life of misery and pain just because "grr suicide is bad >:(" is honestly the dumbest thing i've ever heard. it doesn't make any sense.
i know i'm very young. i'm still attending university and i live at home, so i haven't had to directly deal with most of these realities yet. i've only gotten hints of what's to come with adulthood and i don't think i can handle it.
i do understand why people choose to live despite this bleak existence, but i don't think i'll ever have enough reasons to push me into living out such a life.
apologies for poor grammar, i don't feel like proofreading this.
whenever i rant about those sorts of things, i'm met with the same responses of people just telling me "that's life"/"that's part of being an adult". why should i have to live miserably? people acknowledge these inevitabilities that make life so much worse, but can't seem to fathom why someone would want to ctb.
what, i should prolong this life with guaranteed depression and stress, proceed to live out my painful, lonely elderly years, then die anyways... just because that's what life is?
i see many young-ish people who start their careers and then immediately talk about looking forward to retirement. how bleak is that? committing to something that'll likely last for the majority of your lifetime, and already anticipating the end of it.
i don't see many people who have retired, anyways. most elderly people i've met are still working and will likely do so until they die because the economy is just that fucked up. it's such a sad existence. even if you do manage to retire... so what? a lifetime of struggling just for a few years of freedom and a bit of money? you'll likely be dealing with a plethora of health issues from the stress you had to deal with during your working years + the issues that come with old age... then you die. that's what this all leads up to? why should i live that life? why is that the adult thing to do? that life is not worth living, in my opinion.
choosing a life of misery and pain just because "grr suicide is bad >:(" is honestly the dumbest thing i've ever heard. it doesn't make any sense.
i know i'm very young. i'm still attending university and i live at home, so i haven't had to directly deal with most of these realities yet. i've only gotten hints of what's to come with adulthood and i don't think i can handle it.
i do understand why people choose to live despite this bleak existence, but i don't think i'll ever have enough reasons to push me into living out such a life.
apologies for poor grammar, i don't feel like proofreading this.