
mini_weeny
Every cradle is a grave
- Jan 5, 2021
- 340
Hi guys just need to get this out of my chest. What happens when you are an orphan have no one but a narcissistic "best" friend? You end up here is what happens. In 2019 I got violently ill, this illness threw me in a downward spiral where all my mental health issues that had been in check for years came back with a vengeance, ocd, paranoia, eating disorder... I took so many bad decisions, amongst those was breaking up with this friend because I was tired of being used by her, the consequence of this decision was all of a sudden realizing I had absolutely no one and I had just came back from having surgery at the hospital so as you can imagine my mental issues just became an unmanageable monster plus now I was suicidal. After this breakup I told her to give me back my fathers gun and of course the psychopath gave it back loaded knowing I was depressed... and of course what she intended happened, I was handling the gun and it went off, it destroyed my ears, caused me the hell on earth condition called hyperacusis and now I'm permanently homebound because all normal sounds are pure torture. I'm beyond devastated my life is so over, can't even watch tv with sound, days last ages, (can someone get me outta here!!) I have nightmares with this woman almost every week, I'm pretty sure I have PTSD from the gun incident, oh lord how can life end up like this?? She's moved on and is happy with her new life, I was nothing to her, nothing. My life is nothing, I destroyed my life, my health and my happiness, how can I forgive myself? This is agony, the sound also hurt my cats ears, what can be worse than hurting the loves of your life?? Devastated Someone kill me now pleaseee.