Venting Todays might be the day

[Fire&Ash]

I've been planning to take SN for my method. I have SN, Xanax, meto, ibuprofen, and some soar throat spray. It's mow 9am and I'm drinking a cup of coffee. And I'll eat my last meal. At 9 or 10 pm and head to the local hotel. Or maybe if I'm feeling safe I'll do it at home. Idk. I might chicken out.
I haven't had a debit card or credit card since June. I closed everything because I was planning to use my firearm in my last attempt in June. But since then I just didn't choose a day. Now I am. My car insurance is on pause for just being parked and I don't have any other assets. You guys can look at my previous threads if you're interested. Today I might do it. My Christmas is Jan 7 since I'm orthodox and I just dread going. I don't want to see my relatives. My parents are gunna go crazy if I succeed. I'm just sick of it. I'll keep an update through out the day. Here is my timetable
I plan to take the SN at 10pm

 

[ma0]

I sincerely hope you can find the peace and happiness you're looking for, in whatever way that may be.

 

[Euthanza]

Safe travel bro. May peace be upon you.

Big hugs from another passer by

 

[SVEN]

Every good wish, whatever your decisions.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Safe travels and good luck! I hope you find peace!

 

[everyday struggle]

I hope your successful and find the peace you deserve!

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best in what you decide.

 

[squidsponge]

Will be joining you soon. May you find peace on this journey

 

[Fire&Ash]

It's 1:30pm just a couple more hours to go

 

[SA1994EC]

Whatever you choose to do, and whatever the outcome is, I hope your pain and agony will be depleted and your soul will be in a better place. Wish you luck.

 

[NoHalfMeasures]

Wish you the very best outcome.

 

[Fire&Ash]

Gosh it's hard it's only 3pm and I am sooo hungry ugh

 

[Fire&Ash]

It's 7pm now. I'm not too hungry. I'm still at home. I was almost thinking about doing it in the bathroom but my parents are home. I already made the excuse that I'm going to a bar but I'll be going to a hotel at 8pm. But I'm also still tempted to stay home lol. I checked a measuring cup to see how much 50ml is and it's like a 1/4 cup I think it's really nothing. Might up it a little more. Ugh.

 

[JustHere1]

Best of luck to you. If you feel like you should increase dose, go for it. Better safe than sorry, but be cautious about nausea.

 

[CatLvr]

I hope you find the peace you are seeking, no matter whether you go ahead with your plans or not. There is no shame in changing your mind and trying at a better time, if that is what you decide. Please know we are all thinking of you and only want the best for you -- regardless of how the rest of the evening goes.

 

[Fire&Ash]

I'm currently measuring the SN on my scale and idk if my scale of wonky but it's barely budging. Is 25 grams that much???
This is insane! 25 grams! It's a lot!!

 

[JustHere1]

I'm currently measuring the SN on my scale and idk if my scale of wonky but it's barely budging. Is 25 grams that much???
This is insane! 25 grams! It's a lot!!
View attachment 157194

Grams are the weighing measurement that confuse me the most, I recall once when I first tried shrooms being very surprised by how light they actually were, and I needed to take more than expected for the planned dose I wanted to try. Salt is heavier than dehydrated mushrooms so that does seem visually to be the right amount for the shown weight, but I cannot confirm.

 

[5karlet]

I'm currently measuring the SN on my scale and idk if my scale of wonky but it's barely budging. Is 25 grams that much???
This is insane! 25 grams! It's a lot!!
View attachment 157194

no wonder people always say there's a salty taste looking at that i bet it is

 

[Fire&Ash]

I only measured for one bottle. I put it in a plastic cup and covered it in Saran Wrap. Instead of a hotel, I'm gunna go to my dad's shop and do it in the bathroom. No one will hear me. I got lazy and nervous thinking about going to a hotel. I thought I would make too much noise. Idk. I then have another bottle of water that is like 100ml for drinking the meto and other stuff

 

[JustHere1]

I would stick with the hotel plan - do you know for certain that your dad's shop has no cameras? Will this affect him going forward since it is his shop? Is it possible he could stop by since it is owned by him? In my opinion, you've planned this and now is the time to act, stick with the hotel plan if you can for safety and surety.

Nobody is going to really question your reasoning for going to a hotel. Lots of weird shit goes on in rooms, but they are easy to lock and barricade if necessary.

Good luck!

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

All the best to you, peace and love

 

[Fire&Ash]

I would stick with the hotel plan - do you know for certain that your dad's shop has no cameras? Will this affect him going forward since it is his shop? Is it possible he could stop by since it is owned by him? In my opinion, you've planned this and now is the time to act, stick with the hotel plan if you can for safety and surety.

Nobody is going to really question your reasoning for going to a hotel. Lots of weird shit goes on in rooms, but they are easy to lock and barricade if necessary.

Good luck!

Ya it would affect him since it's his shop. I don't want to go to a hotel and then chicken out and then have to get my deposit back and all

 

[Fire&Ash]

Well my dad is in his office and he will see me going to the shop. If I go to the hotel now he will ask. I said earlier I was going to the bar but at this time 10:50 it will look weird and he will be suspicious. Idk what to do besides doing it in my bathroom upstairs or downstairs

 

[dontwakemeup]

It's so unfortunate that your life has come to this. Whatever you decide, I hope you find peace in your decision. I hope you get the desired outcome you are expecting.

 

[Fire&Ash]

Idk should I just do it in my home bathroom? Idk how loud I will complain or noise I will make ugh

 

[picklemick]

Idk should I just do it in my home bathroom? Idk how loud I will complain or noise I will make ugh

Whatever your going through socks but definitely wait until you're sure you have at least a couple hours of being alone with zero chance of interruption

 

[JustHere1]

Idk should I just do it in my home bathroom? Idk how loud I will complain or noise I will make ugh

Honestly I would wait if you're pressed and unsure. Maybe reschedule to tomorrow? It can't hurt and maybe you can pick more comfortably.

 

[Fire&Ash]

It's midnight. I still haven't drank water or eaten. I'm wondering if I should fast all the night and wait till tomorrow and leave. Idk. Maybe illl stay up a couple more hours and hope my dad goes to sleep so I can sneak off. If I get too tired, I'll see what happens tomorrow and rethink of where to gk

 

[Fire&Ash]

It's been officially 24 hours since I last ate or drank something. It's 10am my parents are awake idk what excuse I would use to go to town for so long to get a hotel. I'm still thinking about going to my dad's shop. Any idea of what I should do between my options? Also, I opened my SN, I measured it out last night, and then I put it in a glass jar. Idk if it will go bad now that it's open. Any help with that? Please

 

[JustHere1]

It's been officially 24 hours since I last ate or drank something. It's 10am my parents are awake idk what excuse I would use to go to town for so long to get a hotel. I'm still thinking about going to my dad's shop. Any idea of what I should do between my options? Also, I opened my SN, I measured it out last night, and then I put it in a glass jar. Idk if it will go bad now that it's open. Any help with that? Please

You should have enough time. I would just go to a hotel and lock up. Since it's the day going to your dad's shop would probably attract attention.

I've never attempted with this method but as for the glass jar and contamination it doesn't go bad that quickly as it takes time for oxygen to affect it, but I haven't done as much research as other methods so far.