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psp3000

Enlightened
May 20, 2023
1,355
I am not sure if its just me or if its due to my prior background in religion (I am not religious) and being sheltered but I find sex and sexual content being discussed in public places absolutely disgusting and physically nauseating

I know its normal for people to do that now but I just cannot get over it and it's so unavoidable and everything's so explicit now

I don't mind it and I interact with sexual content sometimes as an artist and because of my interest in comics and graphic novels but I guess since it's artistic it's different, but hearing and seeing stuff like that all the time outside of choosing to watch pornography makes me snap or break every once in a while I wish I could just get over it

its almost like I'm repulsed by it or something
I don't understand
and I can't stop viewing everyone else as a degenerate or absolutely perverse or disgusting I just can't deal with it I wish I could and I wish I was normal like everyone else and I do not consider myself to be a prude but I do not want to be seen as one and I am not an asexual

nothing bad happened to me growing up or anything to make me feel these feelings

I was having such a good day too but now I feel sick and have lost my appetite
according to the internet what I feel and what I am currently experiencing and my feelings about this would be categorized as mental illness or mental health disorder

I cannot wait to die I wouldn't have to deal with any of this anymore and I could finally feel normal in my own way but for now I need to try to get to the root of the problem and fix this but I doubt that I will and will just move on with whatever other problems I have that are much easier to deal with

I doubt that there will ever be anyone else who understands what this is like and you would think being an adult would automatically resolve or fix the problem or make it disappear because adults talk about sex like all the time or I assume they do I don't know I don't have any friends but if they did talk about that all the time I would not form a friendship with them out of fear and disgust or they would kick me out of their friend group

I feel so childish when will I grow up like everyone else I hate it here (here -> my mind)
 
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D

DynamicDepression

Deranged
Mar 28, 2022
352
Although not to the level of which you're describing, I can relate to your feelings of disgust at witnessing or hearing about sexual content outside of specifically sexual circumstances. I feel as if my mind never developed to the point of being able to discuss and view sexual content in a manner that is healthy for a sexual adult. Does that make any sense?
 
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figure8

figure8

The sun goes down
Jul 17, 2023
76
I doubt that there will ever be anyone else who understands what this is like
I'm impartial to sexual topics now, but I think I can understand you. I used to get physically nauseated merely because of someone mentioning things like these. The nausea was especially hard to manage when I was going through a certain time in my life. I still feel discomfort when thinking about my sexuality.
I feel so childish when will I grow up like everyone else I hate it here (here -> my mind)
We're all children in the core. Don't beat yourself over something you can't control.
 
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psp3000

Enlightened
May 20, 2023
1,355
Although not to the level of which you're describing, I can relate to your feelings of disgust at witnessing or hearing about sexual content outside of specifically sexual circumstances. I feel as if my mind never developed to the point of being able to discuss and view sexual content in a manner that is healthy for a sexual adult. Does that make any sense?
yes this makes sense I feel the same way although I am not a sexually active adult/sexual adult
 
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Per Ardua Ad Astra

Per Ardua Ad Astra

Malpractice: NeuroDystrophy-Paralysis-Meds-Injured
Sep 27, 2022
3,639
💛 SAME : but 57 yo + married 20 years

Imho it's a normal reaction

Imho the *internet's diagnosis = mental illness = nonsense

Imho the *internet = overwhelming + *uninvited saturation of *mature content - worse than being stalked by advertisers

~15 yrs ago was on Tumblr - but ditched when *explicit uninvited content* suddenly appeared in timeline
 
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psp3000

Enlightened
May 20, 2023
1,355
I'm impartial to sexual topics now, but I think I can understand you. I used to get physically nauseated merely because of someone mentioning things like these. The nausea was especially hard to manage when I was going through a certain time in my life. I still feel discomfort when thinking about my sexuality.

We're all children in the core. Don't beat yourself over something you can't control.
I feel discomfort when thinking about my sexuality too so I never think about it at all or at least try not to I don't feel like there's a need for me to anyway

the neasea and pit in stomach feeling is terrible

I think the only time I did okay was when I was in a non sexual environment i.e. not online at all or just avoiding everything when I was online enjoying my hobbies etc. and not having people to talk to that are "normal" so maybe I should observe people more I don't know I mean I already do but I still feel disgusted and the same and abnormal
💛 SAME : but 57 yo + married 20 years

Imho it's a normal reaction

Imho the *internet's diagnosis = mental illness = nonsense

Imho the *internet = overwhelming + *uninvited saturation of *mature content - worse than being stalked by advertisers

~15 yrs ago was on Tumblr - but ditched when *explicit uninvited content* suddenly appeared in timeline
yeah I ditched Tumblr for that reason too it was getting out of hand because I would go there for art, memes, and Etsy like stuff and even though I did the nsfw stuff was unavoidable because the algorithm recommends you stuff your peers or people you follow interact with and even the blocked tags doesnt work 100% of the time to avoid that stuff but at least Pinterest is a-okay haha
 
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Reactions: figure8 and Per Ardua Ad Astra

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