ForgottenAgain
On the rollercoaster of sadness
- Oct 17, 2023
- 1,008
I spent weeks answering calls from Talking Therapies, answering the same questions over and over, to get to today and hear from my GP that they referred me to the crisis team when I told them, on all phone calls, that I never want to go to the crisis team again as I had a bad experience.
The crisis team is just 6 weeks and all about prescribing drugs which I told them I don't want anymore. I said so many times that I'm not in crisis, I have suicidal thoughts but this has been going on for more than a decade, it's not acute, it's part of my daily life. They didn't care...
I asked Talking Therapies on the phone to put me on their system but they said I don't fit the criteria and they couldn't tell me what other system is there, just sent me back to the GP to ask there.
I felt so hopeless...I ended the call as I was starting to cry when I said: "but I don't want drugs, I need help please."
I've been crying all day today. I had used my last strength to do this and now it all went down the drain for the nth time.
Last time this year I was incredibly depressed and started having psychotic symptoms. I'm terrified of it happening again. I can't go back to that place, I can't, I can't, I can't.
Song
The crisis team is just 6 weeks and all about prescribing drugs which I told them I don't want anymore. I said so many times that I'm not in crisis, I have suicidal thoughts but this has been going on for more than a decade, it's not acute, it's part of my daily life. They didn't care...
I asked Talking Therapies on the phone to put me on their system but they said I don't fit the criteria and they couldn't tell me what other system is there, just sent me back to the GP to ask there.
I felt so hopeless...I ended the call as I was starting to cry when I said: "but I don't want drugs, I need help please."
I've been crying all day today. I had used my last strength to do this and now it all went down the drain for the nth time.
Last time this year I was incredibly depressed and started having psychotic symptoms. I'm terrified of it happening again. I can't go back to that place, I can't, I can't, I can't.
Song