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But I'll be its meal. It won't go hungry forever. One big meal sustains them for quite a while.
It's not venomous no, but it'll basically constrict me/crush me and then swallow me. Then I get to rest in peace inside a python.
You haven't seen those pictures of pythons getting cut open with humans inside them? Entirely possible.
It will not swallow you. In theory you would need a 30 foot snake.
I would never starve an animal for eternity. Pythons can go weeks between feeding. I could be its meal. I'm basically the size of a gazelle. Will sustain the python for quite a while.
Yes. That's why I don't want people to take this post so seriously and come up with creative, far-fetched alternatives to ctb.
Yeah, but as others pointed out a python might also struggle with getting a whole human down. Whereas a venomous animals doesn't have to do all that much.
Do a Google image search and see what you find if you don't believe me,
Pythons don't struggle, I've seen them in action with surprisingly large animals. But yes, venomous snakes could do too.Yeah, but as others pointed out a python might also struggle with getting a whole human down. Whereas a venomous animals doesn't have to do all that much.
Sydney funnel-web spider - Wikipedia
en.m.wikipedia.org
Dunno whether you can have one of those as a pet.
Yes, this post was supposed to be fun. There's no way I'll get a python to sleep in my bed. I'm looking for other creative suggestions, they don't have to be serious.
Oh hell yeah, now you're talking. I'm wondering if someone can build one for me. Either that or I'll just go bungee jumping without the rope.
Yeah, I've wondered why more people don't ask about electricity as a method. All those 'danger of death' signs everywhere (round here at least).
Lol. How about I go cage diving with the sharks and escape from the cage? Or what about hiring a hot air balloon and jumping out of it?
"Crisp human."
Shark attacks are actually still a common reason for deaths around the globe. On top of that you can also make it look like an accident.
Hell yes!
No, I'll eat my way out of the python and call it self-defence.
Shark attacks are actually quite rare when considering how many people enter the ocean. Only 16 % of attacks are fatal. You are more likely to wake up in a hospital with missing limbs or chunks of flesh gone. A hippo would be much more likely to kill you.
Yeah, sure there not the most common way to die over all but since @Pookie already gave this example I just wanted to agree that it is still possible to die that way.
We're doing some creative thinking. And humour is part of the process.
I'm depressed as all hell and need some cheering up. Would like to see some creative thinking from others. Just because we're suicidal doesn't mean our brains are stunted. I've seen plenty of humorous comments on these threads, wet blanket.
Then put it on ignore and don't comment. Yawn.
