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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
ive never know. i dont know what its like to feel ready. and yet here i am married at 21, thank you mental disorders.

is it even possible to recover from something like this?
 
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Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
ive never know. i dont know what its like to feel ready. and yet here i am married at 21, thank you mental disorders.

is it even possible to recover from something like this?
I wonder the same thing. Sometimes I feel I would genuinely die by suicide one day. Other days I am not sure. I don't think anyone is ever really ready for death. I think, no matter the circumstances, we have an innate desire to live
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
I wonder the same thing. Sometimes I feel I would genuinely die by suicide one day. Other days I am not sure. I don't think anyone is ever really ready for death. I think, no matter the circumstances, we have an innate desire to live
i wasnt talking about death. thats why its in the recovery section.
 
Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
its cool. im not really the best at going into details about things initially
I see. Thats ok. I am at fault too for not reading carefully and imposing my own bias about suicide.
Any-who, is this pertaining to not feeling ready for marriage?
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
and 'things' like that yeah
 
Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
and 'things' like that yeah
I know it's not the same, though in my case I am thinking about job hunting again before school starts. I feel so unsure and not ready. Like I know mistakes are inevitable but I always feel like I'll just give up because I will feel like an eternal failure.
 
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
I know it's not the same, though in my case I am thinking about job hunting again before school starts. I feel so unsure and not ready. Like I know mistakes are inevitable but I always feel like I'll just give up because I will feel like an eternal failure.
may i ask what kind of job you are looking for compared to the job you want?
 
Good4Nothing

Good4Nothing

Unlovable
May 8, 2020
1,864
Do you think you married too young and you regret it?
 
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Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
may i ask what kind of job you are looking for compared to the job you want?
Tbh I am not sure lol. Just recently I sent an application to volunteer at at a cate cafe I used to help out at before COVID. In terms of an actual job, I really don't know what I want. Besides a few volunteering stuff I've done over the years, I don't have much experience so I feel I wouldn't get anywhere
 
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
Do you think you married too young and you regret it?
basically. my first sexual experiences were for attention. i would cheat on all my bfs. then i got together with this guy and that pretty much only happened because i was ****** and then we got married because i kept going back and forth on it because of my disorders until i finally said fuck it :aw:
 
Last edited:
Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
Tbh I am not sure lol. Just recently I sent an application to volunteer at at a cate cafe I used to help out at before COVID. In terms of an actual job, I really don't know what I want. Besides a few volunteering stuff I've done over the years, I don't have much experience so I feel I wouldn't get anywhere
yeah experience is a problem. i find for most jobs you need X amount of experience and im looking at it going "how am i suppose to get the experience if i cant get the job?"

because I will feel like an eternal failure.
have you tried reminding yourself that its ok mistakes happen. it can take a bit before it sets in though
Do you love him?
im not sure. my emotions and my disorders are all fucked up
 
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Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,203
I can relate to the romance part too. When I find myself liking someone I am aware my BPD can cause my to think about the person in black and white and idolize them in a way that isn't taking into account reality. And then I think they wouldn't like me if they knew about my disorder

Yeah the job experience thing is a doozy. But the only people that can say no is the employer so I still have to try anyways.
 

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