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_battered_butterfly_

_battered_butterfly_

PaperDoll_EasilyTorn
Mar 5, 2021
45
Have Propranolol and SN in my possession... Wow... Feels so surreal.

Also got a bottle of Milk of Mag.

SN was easy to order from a major online store with 2 day shipping... that most in US should be familiar with...

I bought one brand, that's it was 99% pure, then decided to go with another brand. HM A.R.S.

By Tomorrow I shall have two different kinds in my possession. I have heard that the HM kind was mentioned on fix the 26 and said to be reliable. Will do blood test.

The other one I ordered today I haven't opened... Says 99 percent pure ... I see no clumps so an anticaking agent was probably added.

I felt rather nervous today about everything...

Was feeling really good all week until the reality set in, when the SN arrived in the mail. Like this could really be it.

I really hate myself and want to end it all. Family gatherings just make me more painfully aware of how of abnormal, dysfunctional, and terrible I am. Burden. Waste of space and oxygen... I wish I was "normal."
I forgot what being hopeful feels like... What is hope?

Tomorrow, I have an appointment with my doctor to talk about a prescription for METO. I'm explaining that I have severe symptoms of GERD and I haven't had any luck with Zofran.

Got the script for Propranolol due to my blood pressure being high, and struggling with migraines.

Doc wrote that without even seeing me... Just called and complained about my BP...

Just venting and thinking out loud... Not looking for anything with this post. Just spilling thoughts...

Will keep everyone updated.
Much love
 
Last edited:
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: LunarPyotr, LittleBabyNothing and UninformedLover
UninformedLover

UninformedLover

"We will fight this together...as a family."
Nov 12, 2019
304
Good Luck!! I hope all goes well with your doctor's appointment tomorrow. Are you nervous?
 
M

MAA Ke pass

Student
Jan 6, 2021
130
So when u are planning for ctb??
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,163
Wish you the best and remember there's no need to rush things; you already did the hardest part.

Take your time and try to enjoy your last days.

I'll be waiting for your updates.

Hugs!
 
mini_weeny

mini_weeny

Every cradle is a grave
Jan 5, 2021
340
Have Propranolol and SN in my possession... Wow... Feels so surreal.

Also got a bottle of Milk of Mag.

SN was easy to order from a major online store with 2 day shipping... that most in US should be familiar with...

I bought one brand, that's it was 99% pure, then decided to go with another brand. HM A.R.S.

By Tomorrow I shall have two different kinds in my possession. I have heard that the HM kind was mentioned on fix the 26 and said to be reliable. Will do blood test.

The other one I ordered today I haven't opened... Says 99 percent pure ... I see no clumps so an anticaking agent was probably added.

I felt rather nervous today about everything...

Was feeling really good all week until the reality set in, when the SN arrived in the mail. Like this could really be it.

I really hate myself and want to end it all. Family gatherings just make me more painfully aware of how of abnormal, dysfunctional, and terrible I am. Burden. Waste of space and oxygen... I wish I was "normal."
I forgot what being hopeful feels like... What is hope?

Tomorrow, I have an appointment with my doctor to talk about a prescription for METO. I'm explaining that I have severe symptoms of GERD and I haven't had any luck with Zofran.

Got the script for Propranolol due to my blood pressure being high, and struggling with migraines.

Doc wrote that without even seeing me... Just called and complained about my BP...

Just venting and thinking out loud... Not looking for anything with this post. Just spilling thoughts...

Will keep everyone updated.
Much love
You can find happiness without people, think it through if you are not sure about this. Remember death is final, no second chances. If you have a healthy able body there's hope things will get better, just think if what makes you so upset now will matter in 5 years.
 

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