MeltingBrain
Mage
- May 29, 2023
- 586
Your loved ones could spend rest of their lives searching for you . You might want to rethink that
-
Hey Guest,
As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.
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ijustwishtodie
death will be my ultimate bliss
- Oct 29, 2023
- 5,321
If I ever attempt, I suppose I will although I honestly don't want to
Yume Nikki
Member
- Dec 8, 2024
- 81
I think so, I want to leave something for my family behind if I were to go through with it, so they'd know why I did it.
NotSalmon
Asocial Impulse Poster
- Dec 9, 2024
- 39
Maybe a poem, a drawing or something ominous. I am a difficult fucker.
Yes several notes for both family, friends and everyone affected. And probably will information to make everything easier but also being cogniscent of everyone affected that I care about.
Yes, I basically wrote it. Then my therapist said she can't see me anymore basically saying she can't help me. Yeah I knew that. That's why i don't like therapy.
-nobodyknows-
Mage
- Jun 16, 2024
- 503
No. I don't really know how to explain why; I just feel like it would just open the door to more questions.
ShatteredSerenity
I talk to God, but the sky is empty.
- Nov 24, 2024
- 169
I have a lot of stuff like accounts, vehicles, debts, and property in different locations, so I'm planning to leave a document describing everything for whoever has to deal with it. If I don't do that it would be a nightmare to unwind my estate.
I'm a lot less certain about writing anything more personal. I'm not sure I could do it, it's too heartbreaking. Perhaps I'll feel more inspired as the time approaches, but I haven't written anything yet and don't plan to. I think the reasons I did it will be pretty obvious to anyone who knew me.
I'm a lot less certain about writing anything more personal. I'm not sure I could do it, it's too heartbreaking. Perhaps I'll feel more inspired as the time approaches, but I haven't written anything yet and don't plan to. I think the reasons I did it will be pretty obvious to anyone who knew me.
whatcouldofbeen
Member
- Dec 17, 2024
- 17
yes,
but its so painful, the whole process i kept getting stuck in the rut of the note not having enough elements, of it never being enough, endless questions like should i record a sample of my voice? should i train a ai so they can still have conversations with me? would the positvies outweigh the negatives? would they even want to be reminded of it? if they do, is it because they feel like they should because thats what society instilled in them? would me providing more material put more fo apressure for them to read through all of it? retarded shit like that, i guess i accepted that because i wont be here to deal with the consequences i will settle for (in my mind) a near perfect and comprehensive note. to special parties telling them that i loved them and really trying tohammer in the fact that its not their fault and they couldnt have done anything better and that they were perfect and they gave me life meaning, a ride well ridden id say. i would pull out all stops to make sure that they dont beat themselves up with guilt over what they could of done. But i dont know, i dont that will happen its just some shit i heard jordan peterson say on youtube. but because im a dumb cis male i fallfor it.
id go over my favourite memories with each indiviual / group and what i wish i couldve done better and apolgize for anything i remeber doing that was kinda shitty and apologize for anything i dont remember. I guess i would try to clear up and doubts and insecurities they have towards me and themselves. i would tell my best friend to fufill his potential and that i would live through him and that jokingly i would haunt his ass if he doesnt, like a less cinematic of this scene from good will hunting (link below)
it would be nonserious and joking in manner, lighthearted, maybe too much to a point of contrivance. because thats how i always was and i dont want them to experience me like this, all serious and stuff. but i guess that was a character flaw that casued the event?
to be honest i will be writing letters for people that i blame irrationally or not. but i wouldnt say anything about it i will leave out the negative parts because that what i do. and maybe if i didnt i wouldnt find myself in this mess i dont know, every little thing and its accompanying butterfly effect. drives me nuts to think of the infiintie possibilities that all blindingly seem better.
As of now, it would be a google doc, with a general faq for everyone and indivivualised letters in each section. I guess i wouldnt mind the other recipients knowing about how i thought of everyone else. its entertaining to me and maybe it will be a start of a beautiful friendship. During my life, i took a weird satisfaction and happiness in trying to merge different friend groups together i thought it was heart-warming. so i guess it makes me happier.
i guess i wouldnt help myself in being negative when im writing the letters, i think i would be too weak a man to resist the unconcious slips. but obviously i would edit to make sure that any critcism is a shit sandwich, outshined by the mentioedn positive character qualities and above all constructive adn i would add a little note or remark about like at the time of writing these notes i had a couple of out-of-body expereinces from stress and sleep / undistinguished nightmares and dreams from reality and that you know im not thinking straight and i dont know you fully enough so take my word with a grain of salt espcially because i always put on the facade of steamrolling any deep emotional issues with a joking cheery disposition. so naturally that owuld prevent alot of deeptalks from ahppening save for a few close people.
i would include a folder with pictures and videos of my favourite memories and being the people pleasing pushover i am say that justbecause you didnt make as much appearances as the other people or no appearances at all its not because i dont value or remember you. "ah you know im not really mentally well enough or care enough to carefully compile shit, besides if your reading this im already dead cut me some slack lol!" something like that.
im too conflicted over how i should write the section to my parents, i cry like abitch too mcuh when i think about. i guess i would add a little secret easter egg about how i really feel and say some brutal truths. ill include the memo to my parents but im gonna lead the others on a easter egg hunt for it! like a really shitty version of cicada 3301!
i guess it would be "mortally" embarassing for me if they didnt even bother to try to crack the code of the secret note even if they know of its existence.
I guess i would include this account in the secret memo so they could see the ugly (?) process of it all
also i plan on livestreming or recording my death if you got any morbid requests send them in, auto-erotic asphyixation? trump costume? luigi mangione altar in the background? fake satanic risutalistic sacrfice? nothing is off limits! after all.... just nothing too expensive or hard to obtain i guess i got stuff to do lol. im gonna have to take alot of breaks when writing the section for my parents and family. Fuck i might have to translate it to mandarin too, fuck me.
i guess for the most part i wouldnt really edit the letters in the sense of not deleting any sentiments or ideas, only rewording and adding ideas. i think the spelling mistakes and weird flow represented how i jested in real life.
anyways tldr: im overthinking this and trying to reach perfection, in a fucing suicide letter. where was this attitude before the event happned lol? thats probably what my parents would say but i guess i jsut never showed people this side of me.
i hope you found this incoherent rambling entertaining at least. i hope it could give you ideas for your own note so you could be more content in your bus ride out this mortal realm. And i hope this ideas dont leave you down a obsessive path like me irght now.
but its so painful, the whole process i kept getting stuck in the rut of the note not having enough elements, of it never being enough, endless questions like should i record a sample of my voice? should i train a ai so they can still have conversations with me? would the positvies outweigh the negatives? would they even want to be reminded of it? if they do, is it because they feel like they should because thats what society instilled in them? would me providing more material put more fo apressure for them to read through all of it? retarded shit like that, i guess i accepted that because i wont be here to deal with the consequences i will settle for (in my mind) a near perfect and comprehensive note. to special parties telling them that i loved them and really trying tohammer in the fact that its not their fault and they couldnt have done anything better and that they were perfect and they gave me life meaning, a ride well ridden id say. i would pull out all stops to make sure that they dont beat themselves up with guilt over what they could of done. But i dont know, i dont that will happen its just some shit i heard jordan peterson say on youtube. but because im a dumb cis male i fallfor it.
id go over my favourite memories with each indiviual / group and what i wish i couldve done better and apolgize for anything i remeber doing that was kinda shitty and apologize for anything i dont remember. I guess i would try to clear up and doubts and insecurities they have towards me and themselves. i would tell my best friend to fufill his potential and that i would live through him and that jokingly i would haunt his ass if he doesnt, like a less cinematic of this scene from good will hunting (link below)
it would be nonserious and joking in manner, lighthearted, maybe too much to a point of contrivance. because thats how i always was and i dont want them to experience me like this, all serious and stuff. but i guess that was a character flaw that casued the event?
to be honest i will be writing letters for people that i blame irrationally or not. but i wouldnt say anything about it i will leave out the negative parts because that what i do. and maybe if i didnt i wouldnt find myself in this mess i dont know, every little thing and its accompanying butterfly effect. drives me nuts to think of the infiintie possibilities that all blindingly seem better.
As of now, it would be a google doc, with a general faq for everyone and indivivualised letters in each section. I guess i wouldnt mind the other recipients knowing about how i thought of everyone else. its entertaining to me and maybe it will be a start of a beautiful friendship. During my life, i took a weird satisfaction and happiness in trying to merge different friend groups together i thought it was heart-warming. so i guess it makes me happier.
i guess i wouldnt help myself in being negative when im writing the letters, i think i would be too weak a man to resist the unconcious slips. but obviously i would edit to make sure that any critcism is a shit sandwich, outshined by the mentioedn positive character qualities and above all constructive adn i would add a little note or remark about like at the time of writing these notes i had a couple of out-of-body expereinces from stress and sleep / undistinguished nightmares and dreams from reality and that you know im not thinking straight and i dont know you fully enough so take my word with a grain of salt espcially because i always put on the facade of steamrolling any deep emotional issues with a joking cheery disposition. so naturally that owuld prevent alot of deeptalks from ahppening save for a few close people.
i would include a folder with pictures and videos of my favourite memories and being the people pleasing pushover i am say that justbecause you didnt make as much appearances as the other people or no appearances at all its not because i dont value or remember you. "ah you know im not really mentally well enough or care enough to carefully compile shit, besides if your reading this im already dead cut me some slack lol!" something like that.
im too conflicted over how i should write the section to my parents, i cry like abitch too mcuh when i think about. i guess i would add a little secret easter egg about how i really feel and say some brutal truths. ill include the memo to my parents but im gonna lead the others on a easter egg hunt for it! like a really shitty version of cicada 3301!
i guess it would be "mortally" embarassing for me if they didnt even bother to try to crack the code of the secret note even if they know of its existence.
I guess i would include this account in the secret memo so they could see the ugly (?) process of it all
also i plan on livestreming or recording my death if you got any morbid requests send them in, auto-erotic asphyixation? trump costume? luigi mangione altar in the background? fake satanic risutalistic sacrfice? nothing is off limits! after all.... just nothing too expensive or hard to obtain i guess i got stuff to do lol. im gonna have to take alot of breaks when writing the section for my parents and family. Fuck i might have to translate it to mandarin too, fuck me.
i guess for the most part i wouldnt really edit the letters in the sense of not deleting any sentiments or ideas, only rewording and adding ideas. i think the spelling mistakes and weird flow represented how i jested in real life.
anyways tldr: im overthinking this and trying to reach perfection, in a fucing suicide letter. where was this attitude before the event happned lol? thats probably what my parents would say but i guess i jsut never showed people this side of me.
i hope you found this incoherent rambling entertaining at least. i hope it could give you ideas for your own note so you could be more content in your bus ride out this mortal realm. And i hope this ideas dont leave you down a obsessive path like me irght now.
lol so real, thats why i cant do the shrink thing. they probably wont understand their clients and in the event they do they cant express it because of "professionalism" atleast for me i need a real one to tell me whats up frankly and i hate the cliched sugar coating bullshit ideas present in therapy i guess (pickle rick sorta?)
iloveduster
Member
- Jan 21, 2024
- 68
I don't know honestly but mostly no because I don't really have anyone to leave it to except like people who sort of showed me that they care about me but I don't think I'm close enough to anybody for them to genuinely cry or grieve my death. I find it pretty awkward to write to people if for example I attempt suicide but it fails and then the police finds my suicide notes...
Tig
Student
- Oct 17, 2024
- 102
Nope
Suicide notes are for the selfish ones you leave behind, cowards and sissies.
Say what needs to be said, straight to someone's face or not at all.
They will respect your decision or they won't, notes have a way spinning a different tale.
Suicide notes are for the selfish ones you leave behind, cowards and sissies.
Say what needs to be said, straight to someone's face or not at all.
They will respect your decision or they won't, notes have a way spinning a different tale.
failureofahuman
Born failure, live failure, die failure
- Nov 1, 2024
- 51
No, first of all interestingly most people who die by suicide (3/4) do not leave a suicide note. Most suicide notes are mundane too, for example as mentioned above notes about calling the police so as to keep people from seeing the body, notes about finances. Most notes have short sentences (I read all of this in Thomas Joiner's Myths about Suicide). Me personally I feel like I can't say all of my thoughts or come up with anything impactful. It's too much for me
I'm not planning on killing myself anymore, but if I ever do, I will leave one to my loved ones.
daysnumbered
To be or not to be
- Aug 21, 2024
- 31
Yes, but I'm not entirely sure what I am going to write in it just yet. Hopefully I could give them some closure even though they won't understand why.
OptingOutSmiling
Student
- Nov 25, 2024
- 110
No, I think everything that should've been said will no longer matter and it may just cause unnecessary pain as people tend to read things in their own way and it's really not about them. Just a note as to my identity, and make sure my affairs are in order. There are very few "real" people in my life, and I trust the one or two who know me will understand. I'll say goodbye to you guys on here of course.
BlockHammer
Confused loser
- Oct 25, 2023
- 246
Well i don't know, im thinking about to make one to my parents because at least i can say goodbye(via note), maybe i also try to at least say "thank you" to my friend that has been nice to me, or maybe it's better to just leave them in silence. Both of this choices had an consequence that really severe so im still confuse up to this point
ImUsedToIt
New Member
- May 13, 2024
- 3
i don't really want to, but i feel like i should. maybe something short for the people in my life
I'm not sure. I've already said a lot in life. If anyone cared maybe things would be different. Silence and not leaving something factual behind sounds good
avoid_slow_death
Ready to embrace the peaceful bliss of the void.
- Feb 4, 2020
- 1,269
Been debating this heavily lately and have come to the decision that no, I likely won't. It wouldn't matter anyways because anyone who knew me likely won't be impacted other than a few tears. My passing will be like some distant bad news from another country. Sad, but it happens and doesn't effect them directly because it's so far removed from their everyday lives.
revontulet
Member
- Aug 4, 2024
- 37
