LuzurPhagget
Experienced
- Sep 15, 2019
- 288
Anybody got back into the dating scene after entering "recovery?"
Ugh, I don't even know where to go from here. I don't even think I've actually BEEN on a date before in my life. Jebus Christ. How do I even mingle in with the normies? What do they even talk/bond about? Food/ tv shows/ gossip etc? I KNOW I'll never be normal. I know suicidal thoughts won't ever be too far away in my mind and ultimately, that's probably how my life will end. Whatever, I'll try to go as far as I can in life, but I don't think I should be fooling myself. Anyway, it'd be nice to get SOME enjoyment out of this life, but I'm not even entirely sure if dating is even the way to go about that lol. So many nasty, unkind people out there (men AND women). Maybe I'd be saving myself the heartache/headache by not even entering that world. Maybe I would actually feel better just avoiding the dating realm altogether. I dunno.
Honestly, it would be nice to date someone I could actually be frank with. Just be like, "yo, you're the first person I've ever played mini golf with!" etc (I wouldn't exactly open with that line, but you get the picture). Just somebody who wouldn't make THAT big of a deal if that truth were to present itself, because honestly, I don't think it's THAT big of fucking deal, contrary to dating coaches and Cosmo and GQ etc telling me otherwise. Society is so weird like that. Why should shit like that even matter?!? Such an unkind place. I've already accepted that idea, but it would just be so motherfucking frustrating trying to convince/find others with that same shared thought.
Anyway, I have a few dating apps (stupid Tinder, OkCupid) and I've actually gotten a couple likes, but I've been pretty selective in who I like back. If I don't even feel like I'm even going to talk to the person, I'm not even going to like back. Haven't had a single online conversation yet though lol. I dunno, am I doing this right?!? Am I overthinking the shit out of this and just need to plunge myself into the waters or am I simply sparing myself other people's bullshit / heart/headache etc? Honestly, at this point in my life, I actually kind of prefer my own company over just ANY company. Not to be too discriminatory/ mean, but I believe no company is better than bad company.
Any tips/advice?
Ugh, I don't even know where to go from here. I don't even think I've actually BEEN on a date before in my life. Jebus Christ. How do I even mingle in with the normies? What do they even talk/bond about? Food/ tv shows/ gossip etc? I KNOW I'll never be normal. I know suicidal thoughts won't ever be too far away in my mind and ultimately, that's probably how my life will end. Whatever, I'll try to go as far as I can in life, but I don't think I should be fooling myself. Anyway, it'd be nice to get SOME enjoyment out of this life, but I'm not even entirely sure if dating is even the way to go about that lol. So many nasty, unkind people out there (men AND women). Maybe I'd be saving myself the heartache/headache by not even entering that world. Maybe I would actually feel better just avoiding the dating realm altogether. I dunno.
Honestly, it would be nice to date someone I could actually be frank with. Just be like, "yo, you're the first person I've ever played mini golf with!" etc (I wouldn't exactly open with that line, but you get the picture). Just somebody who wouldn't make THAT big of a deal if that truth were to present itself, because honestly, I don't think it's THAT big of fucking deal, contrary to dating coaches and Cosmo and GQ etc telling me otherwise. Society is so weird like that. Why should shit like that even matter?!? Such an unkind place. I've already accepted that idea, but it would just be so motherfucking frustrating trying to convince/find others with that same shared thought.
Anyway, I have a few dating apps (stupid Tinder, OkCupid) and I've actually gotten a couple likes, but I've been pretty selective in who I like back. If I don't even feel like I'm even going to talk to the person, I'm not even going to like back. Haven't had a single online conversation yet though lol. I dunno, am I doing this right?!? Am I overthinking the shit out of this and just need to plunge myself into the waters or am I simply sparing myself other people's bullshit / heart/headache etc? Honestly, at this point in my life, I actually kind of prefer my own company over just ANY company. Not to be too discriminatory/ mean, but I believe no company is better than bad company.
Any tips/advice?