Venting Diary of a Lonely Man

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

This is an old stream of consciousness thing I wrote many years ago. It was after I left the psych ward. I haven't read it in so long and I'm afraid it would trigger old wounds, but I'm letting it here for you to peruse. Enjoy:

https://commaful.com/play/mhfiver/diary-of-a-lonely-man---part-1/
WARNING: There's a lot of NSFW stuff in there. If you're not comfortable with that please do not read.

I'll be glad to hear out what you think about it, though.

 

[CatLvr]

I'm just tagging to come back later when I'm not actively trying to die, so I can read your posts. That, and Harvey the Tuxedo Cat is laying in the middle of me, wanting petting. And who am I to deny Harvey his wants and needs??

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I'm just tagging to come back later when I'm not actively trying to die, so I can read your posts. That, and Harvey the Tuxedo Cat is laying in the middle of me, wanting petting. And who am I to deny Harvey his wants and needs??

Hahah. thanks for your interest. I hope my thoughts don't traumatize you further.

 

[psp3000]

the animal part made me think of the time that I watched The Lobster

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

the animal part made me think of the time that I watched The Lobster

Ah yeah, probably a lot of "I wanna be an animal" stuff. Still kinda want to.

 

[AdultVirgin]

How long were you in the psych ward?

They had me in there for 6 months

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

How long were you in the psych ward?

They had me in there for 6 months

21 days, not much, but it absolutely wrecked my psyche.

 

[psp3000]

Ah yeah, probably a lot of "I wanna be an animal" stuff. Still kinda want to.

I don't blame you

bear life seems okay/good

Spoiler: tw: one bear in this On Sight edit gets tranquilized

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

I don't blame you

bear life seems okay/good

Spoiler: tw: one bear in this On Sight edit gets tranquilized

I've thought about becomig a bear, a fox, a wolf...probably because their lives aren't wrecked with mental pain like ours.

I would love to be a big fluffy tame bear and let people hug me for support.

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Oh god, I just started to read part of it and...I was so much worse back then. The cringe is palpable.

I just can't read it back without getting really sick at myself for some things.

For comparison, I've wrote that like 8 years ago. I was...god, I didn't think I would say that, but I'm much more mentally stable nowadays. I still have problems but it seems I'm better at handling them now.

I'm actually kind of ashamed of myself. Like...how did I even think some of those things. Maybe I'm still like that but I don't realize it. Bad memories best forgotten for me, I guess.

I need something to wash these thoughts away...