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*Winter-Volume*

*Winter-Volume*

Why Me?
Oct 20, 2024
55
I've tried to be a functional member of society for 52 years. It hasn't worked. I'm good at lying to myself and others to protect myself. I've taken all the high roads. I've squandered my resources. Right now, a shotgun blast to the head is very appealing. I've had suicidal ideation all of my adult life. I don't want to try again at this. People don't want me around. They let me know over and over. I have no friends, and never will. People have a natural inclination to avoid my company. I'm a wet blanket I guess. Well I'm done. It'll be soon. I'm gonna buy a shotgun and buckshot. I know a place in the woods where I can set up a chair and prop the gun against something hard. Barrel goes in my mouth pointed slightly upwards towards the brain stem and goodbye cruel world. I don't know exactly when, but I'm getting close. I feel it. I'm sorry if anyone gets hurt. I just hate my life.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,721
I certainly understand that it's so dreadful suffering in this existence that is so cruel to me but anyway I wish you the best, I hope that you find what you are searching for.
 
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Shadows From Hell

Shadows From Hell

The one who has lost a lot, fears nothing.
Oct 21, 2024
423
Living life is more painful than losing the love of your life.

Here's to hoping you have a good weekend at least.
 
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*Winter-Volume*

*Winter-Volume*

Why Me?
Oct 20, 2024
55
I'm just feeling so done with all this. I have no privacy in life. I'm watched constantly by people who pretend to love others but don't. I'm a prisoner in Hell. I'm glad to be able to talk about it with people who understand.
 
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Reactions: MatrixPrisoner and Shadows From Hell
LostinTime24

LostinTime24

Discharged&Defeated
Mar 26, 2024
55
I've tried to be a functional member of society for 52 years. It hasn't worked. I'm good at lying to myself and others to protect myself. I've taken all the high roads. I've squandered my resources. Right now, a shotgun blast to the head is very appealing. I've had suicidal ideation all of my adult life. I don't want to try again at this. People don't want me around. They let me know over and over. I have no friends, and never will. People have a natural inclination to avoid my company. I'm a wet blanket I guess. Well I'm done. It'll be soon. I'm gonna buy a shotgun and buckshot. I know a place in the woods where I can set up a chair and prop the gun against something hard. Barrel goes in my mouth pointed slightly upwards towards the brain stem and goodbye cruel world. I don't know exactly when, but I'm getting close. I feel it. I'm sorry if anyone gets hurt. I just hate my life.
That's about where I'm at I'm only 25 but I can't imagine hanging in there as long as you have. I hope you find peace
 
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MatrixPrisoner

MatrixPrisoner

Enlightened
Jul 8, 2023
1,834
I'm 45 and have finally realized that if my adult life hasn't changed yet, then it probably never will. No way in hell I'm sticking around for another 20-30 years if this. And I'm no longer ashamed of it.

For most people, existence just doesn't make sense. I have a really strong distaste for useless people that keep on having useless kids.
 
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