Venting General thread for my vents about wanting to die

[FuneralCry]

Never existing at all would have saved me from all the suffering.
It truly would have which is why I wish that more than anything I never suffered at all, I wish I was never forced into this cruel, torturous existence where there is all this suffering all for the sake of it. To me existence truly is an imposition, I find it so terrible how I was forced into existence even know it isn't like I could suffer from never existing at all and I saw existence as completely unnecessary anyway, it just creates so much pain there was never a need for, to be conscious is such a torturous futile burden to me that just causes so much suffering and under no circumstances would I wish to suffer, I'd never wish for existence as it's the source of all suffering, I'm always wishing to erase my existence so it's like I never suffered at all.

I want it to be like I never became aware of something as cruel and terrible as existence, to me existing truly is nothing but suffering, I never would have chose any of this and never would do under any circumstances but now I exist and suffer so much as a result all I can hope for is the relief of a painless death, I only hope to never suffer again, I'd personaly always prefer to prevent suffering than prolong it but of course I wish I never suffered at all. To suffer in this existence will always be deeply undesirable to me no matter what, only not existing is desirable to me and it brings me so much pain how I cannot just have the option to die painlessly to prevent suffering in this existence that just leads to decay and death anyway and there is no limit as to how much one can suffer in this existence, death truly would be the only relief for me but of course I wish I never suffered at all, I never should have existed, to me existence just feels like a mistake.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing is just waiting to die.
No matter what I'll always see existing as just waiting to die, I'm so tired of suffering in this cruel, futile existence I always saw as a mistake, I wish I could just fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and never suffer ever again, to me existing truly is so pointless and unnecessary, it just causes and brings suffering all for the sake of it until death takes away all anyway. I'd always prefer to not exist than prolong all the suffering in an existence where I'm just waiting to die anyway, I'd always prefer to cease existing than suffer all for the sake of it just to end up way more tortured in an existence where there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel.

I just want death to take away all the suffering for me, it feels so cruel to me how even know existing is just waiting to die anyway I cannot just have the option to painlessly die in peace to escape from unnecessary suffering, I just want all the suffering to be gone for me, I never would have wished for existence but rather I'd prefer to avoid it no matter what. I'd prefer to cease existing sooner as after all if I'm dead I cannot suffer and the burden of existence is no longer my problem but of course more than anything I wish I never suffered at all, as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for death, in an existence where I suffer for the sake of it where I'm just waiting to die anyway non-existence truly would be the only peace and relief for me, I just wish to never exist again and it terrifies me how this existence can continue for so long, peace for me could only ever lie in being permanently free from the cruelty and futility of existence, as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for some peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

Never was meant for the pain of existing.
I truly was never meant for the pain of existing and I never should have existed at all, I'd never wish for existence under any circumstances rather I see existing as so undesirable, it's just a burden that causes harm and suffering tormenting existing beings and I really was never meant for any of this but rather I'm just meant for nothingness. I'm only meant for peace from all the suffering and for me peace could only ever lie in non-existence, as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for permanent relief and freedom from this existence, if I don't exist I cannot suffer which is why non-existence is all I hope for.

I really was never meant for any of this which is why it feels so cruel to me how I cannot just have the option to die painlessly, being able to cease existing in peace truly would solve everything for me, it'll always feel so painful how the suffering just continues instead, I wish I could just fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and never suffer ever again, existence will always be something so terrible to me no matter what, it's something so cruel, so painful, so torturous. I just wish I could erase my existence so it's like I never suffered, I truly was never meant for the terrible mistake that is existence and I never should have existed at all, I wish I never became conscious, to be conscious in this existence is such a torturous, pointless burden to me, it's something I'd never wish for and as long as I exist I'll only hope and wish to never suffer again, I'm always so tired of it all, I've suffered so much for so long in this existence I really was never meant for.

 

[FuneralCry]

Always wishing to just cease existing in peace.
All I personally hope and wish for is to cease existing in peace and never suffer ever again, it'll always feel so cruel to me how I cannot just have the option to simply die in a painless way despite how existence is just unnecessary suffering with no limit as to how much agony one can feel. I find it deeply undesirable to have to suffer in this existence and I never wished to exist in the first place, I never would have chosen to exist, in an existence so torturous and futile that just causes suffering all for the sake of it death truly is the only relief for me and it's all I'll wish for as long as I suffer in this existence.

I just hope and wish for nothingness which is why there's so much pain in how I cannot just peacefully cease existing to escape from and prevent all future suffering in an existence I just saw as a mistake in the first place, there's just so much suffering in this existence, it's all just so terrible to me. All I personally hope for is peace from the cruel and pointless burden of existing as a human, I'm always wishing I could just fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and forget about it all but of course the suffering just continues instead with me just hoping and wishing to be gone, I'll always be so tired of being trapped in this existence and it feels so horrible how I cannot just painlessly free myself from it in peace, I'd always prefer to not exist than to prolong the suffering just to be tortured by old age, I wish for death as only then will I be safe from suffering and to never suffer again is all I hope for.

 

[FuneralCry]

Still just hoping for eternal sleep.
Eternal sleep will be all I hope for no matter what, as long as I suffer in this existence I'll only hope for the peace of never suffering again, to me existing means to suffer and to permanently cease existing means to never suffer again, I'm always so tired of suffering in this cruel torturous existence where there is all this endless pain and the pain of existence just continues. I wish I could just die in peace and forget about it all, existence just feels like a mistake to me and always will do no matter what, more than anything I wish I never suffered but now I suffer so much and have done for so long all I can wish for is dreamless, eternal sleep.

I wish for an eternal sleep free from all pain and suffering where I cannot be harmed in any way and all is finally forgotten about for me, I'd never wish for any of the suffering this existence causes, it's all so terrible and unnecessary to me, eternal sleep is all that can bring me peace and for me peace could only ever exist in death, I could never see any peace in this existence that just causes so much harm and I find it painful to simply be conscious. Existence itself will always be the true problem to me which is why I only hope and wish for eternal sleep, I wish for no more pain, no more suffering, I wish for all to be finally gone for me, I'd prefer to forget about this existence no matter what, eternal sleep truly is all that can solve everything for me and is all I'll hope for, I just wish for some peace, I wish for permanent relief and freedom from this existence that just brought so much suffering all for the sake of it.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only wishing to be gone
No matter what as long as I exist I'll only wish to never exist again, ceasing to exist truly is all I've ever personally hoped for, I'd always prefer to not exist than suffer in this meaningless, cruel and torturous existence, for me existence itself is the problem, it's something that just causes suffering that I'd prefer to avoid. I'd never wish for existence and see existence as a terrible, tragic mistake and I'll suffer as long as I exist, I only wish to be gone as after all only in death will I be unable to suffer, only death can take all the suffering away, I certainly was never meant to suffer in this existence I never would have chosen under any circumstances.

For me death truly is peace, I've only ever wished for an eternal, dreamless sleep free from all pain and suffering where all is finally gone for me, I've suffered for so long but more than anything I never should have suffered in the first place, something as harmful as existence is something I'd prefer to stay permanently unaware of no matter what. I only wish for death as only then am I safe from all suffering with all finally gone for me, non-existence truly is all I see as desirable. Non-existence truly would solve everything for me, as long as I exist I'll only ever hope to be gone, I'll only ever hope for peace from all the suffering, I'd always prefer to not exist than to be burdened with this existence where there's no limit as to how much agony one can feel destined for nothing but to decay and be tortured by old age. I just have no interest in suffering in this existence, to me existence is something deeply undesirable that just causes suffering and harm which is why I only wish to be gone and as long as I exist I'll only hope to never suffer again.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

It's relieving for me to see somebody else on this site being anti suffering. It feels like a lot of people are pro suffering and I'm going insane because of this. Thank you for your posts FC and for reminding me that other sane people in this world exist

 

[FuneralCry]

I'll always see existence as the problem.
For me no matter what the problem will always lie in existence itself with ceasing to exist being the solution for me, ceasing to exist will always be the solution for me as after all if I don't exist then I cannot suffer in any way, all suffering is ultimately as a result of existence itself after all which is why I see existence as the problem. Personally I find it such a cruel, futile burden to exist at all, I have no interest in suffering in this existence and see existence as deeply undesirable.

To me existence will always feel like a mistake and I find it terrifying how one can exist for so long with no limit as to how much one can suffer, for me death is always preferable to suffering in this torturous, meaningless existence, I don't see value to suffering in this existence rather I'd prefer to avoid existence no matter what, I've never wished for existence and never would do rather I'd prefer to simply cease existing and never suffer ever again but of course I wish I never suffered in the first place.
I see existence as a problem that was completely unnecessary that there was never a need for that just created so much suffering all for the sake of it, I find it so terrible how I had to exist at all even know it isn't like I could suffer from never being forced into existence, never existing in the first place would have saved me from all this suffering which is why it's all I wish for but now that I exist all I can wish for is the freedom and relief of ceasing to exist, I'll always see existence itself as the problem, I find it so burdensome to exist and I'll suffer as long as I exist.

 

[FuneralCry]

Death would be the only relief for me personally.
It truly would be and as long as I exist I really will only ever hope and wish for death, I see death as a relief as after all only in death will this existence be no longer my problem and I'll finally be unable to suffer, I only wish to never suffer ever again. To me existence really is something so terrible and torturous that just creates suffering all for the sake of it, I'd never wish for existence but rather I just wish for the absence of it, I wish for an eternal, dreamless sleep free from all cruelty and suffering, only in death will I be finally safe from suffering which is why it's all I hope for.

I'd always prefer to painlessly not exist than prolong the suffering just to end up way more tortured and tormented just to die in agony from old age, in non-existence there is no suffering yet there is no limit as to how unbearable this existence can get and that is why ceasing to exist is the only relief for me as all suffering is ultimately as a result of existence, to me existence just feels like a mistake. I'd always prefer nothingness over all this unnecessary suffering in this existence I always saw as a burden anyway, I see it as a burden to be conscious and have to experience anything at all, personally I just wish to be unaware, I just wish for the peace of non-existence to take away all the suffering and there's so much suffering in this cruel, torturous existence, I just wish to die in peace and forget about it all which is why it feels so horrible to me how I cannot just die painlessly, I only wish for death to bring me relief from all the suffering this existence brings.

 

[FuneralCry]

Just wishing to disappear from this existence.
I personally only hope to cease existing but really I wish I could disappear from this existence, I wish I could erase my existence so it's like I never suffered at all. Being able to disappear from this existence would solve everything for me, as after all if there is no existence there is no suffering, I'd always prefer to be permanently unconscious of this cruel, meaningless existence, for me existence itself will always be the true problem, I see human existence as such a terrible mistake that I was never meant for. I just want to erase it all for me, I want all to be forgotten about for me, I'd always prefer to painlessly cease existing than to prolong all this suffering that was completely unnecessary, existence just creates pain there was never a need for, it's all just so terrible to me and I see it as all so futile anyway.

I wish to disappear as I see existence as something so undesirable, it's something that just harms existing beings with no limit as to how much agony one can feel, I just personally want some peace, I wish to never suffer ever again, I'll always find it a burden to be conscious and aware suffering all for the sake of it, and I've suffered for so long for so much already. I truly was never meant for something as pointless and torturous as existence but rather I'm just meant for nothingness, to me existing truly does just mean suffering and I'd never wish to suffer, I see no value to suffering in this existence, I wish to cease existing in peace and forget about it all but really I wish I could just erase my existence, I'm always wishing for all to be gone for me, I'm always so tired of it all, in fact I've always felt tired.

 

[FuneralCry]

Always so tired of being burdened with this existence.
No matter what I'll always be so tired of it all, I'm so tired of being burdened with this existence. And I'll always find it a burden to exist, it's a burden to have to wake again and suffer so much as a result, to me existing truly does feel like nothing but suffering and what is so terrible is how there is no limit as to how unbearable it can get. I personally only wish and hope for nothingness, I don't wish to experience anything at all, ceasing to exist truly would solve everything for me as after all there is no suffering in non-existence and this burden is no longer my problem, personally I just want to sleep, I want all to be gone for me, I wish for no more pain, no more suffering.

I'll always find it so dreadful and undesirable to have to exist, I find it painful and tiring to simply be conscious. To me existence will always feel like a mistake, it just creates problems, pain and suffering there was never an need for at all and if if I don't exist then I cannot be harmed in any way and nothing can matter to me, I see existence as the most pointless, unnecessary burden that serves no purpose but to create suffering all for the sake of it, tormenting existing beings until they die anyway. I see existing as just waiting to die anyway and no matter what I'd always prefer to be permanently free from the burden of existence, I only hope for non-existence, for me peace truly could only lie in never suffering again and to never suffer again is all I wish for, I have no interest in the meaningless struggle of existence rather I just want peace instead, only death can solve what the ultimate problem is for me which is existence itself.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence is just so cruel.
It truly is so cruel and there's just so much cruelty in this futile, torturous existence, it's why I only just wish for death, I wish for an eternal, dreamless sleep where all is forgotten about for me. Existence always did feel like a mistake to me, it's one so terrible and I wish I never suffered at all more than anything, I really was never meant for the cruelty of existence, and what is so cruel is how there is no limit as to how unbearable it can get, to me existing truly is just suffering all for no reason and no purpose, I see existence as the most horrific tragedy that was completely unnecessary that there was never a need for.

I wish to just die in peace and forget about it all, I wish to be permanently unaware, to be conscious capable of suffering to unlimited extents is something so terrible and dreadful to me, there's so much cruelty in this existence and what terrifies me is how this existence can continue for so much longer. I just want to die in peace and forget about it all, I'd always prefer the permanency and peace of non-existence over the cruelty and futility of suffering in this meaningless existence that just leads to decay and death anyway. The thought of suffering until old age is horrifying to me, it'll always feel so cruel how I cannot just have the option to painlessly die in peace to escape from the torment and suffering of existence, I'd never wish to exist, I never would have chosen to exist, I wish to just die in peace and never suffer ever again, something as cruel as existence will always feel so deeply undesirable to me, the true problem for me will always lie in existence itself no matter what.

 

[FuneralCry]

Wishing for painless way.
I'm always wishing and hoping for a painless way to never suffer ever again, it always feels so cruel and horrible to me how I cannot just have the option to peacefully die to escape from all unnecessary suffering in this existence I never would have wished for. I only personally hope for peace from all the suffering this existence causes but of course I never should have suffered at all, I wish I was never forced into this exisrence more than anything but now that I suffer and have done for so long all I can hope for is the peace of never suffering ever again.

I'll always see so much cruelty in how I cannot just die painlessly as existence truly is so undesirable for me, only death can bring me peace from this cruel, futile existence and to have the option to peacefully die would be suffering prevention, it'd prevent so much unnecessary suffering. All I wish and hope for is to never suffer ever again, to me existence will always feel like a mistake, a mistake so terrible and torturous that just causes endless amounts of suffering, I wish I could just fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and forget about it all and I have no interest in suffering in this existence anyway, rather I just wish for nothingness. I'd always prefer to not exist than to be tormented suffering in this existence that just leads to decay and death anyway, it terrifies me how a human can exist for so long just to be tormented by old age, I'd never wish for any of this but rather I just hope for some peace instead, as long as I exist I'll only wish for a painless way to finally be free from all suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only in death will I be at peace.
No matter what death truly is the only peace for me, only in death will I be at peace with all the suffering gone and forgotten about, there's so much cruelty in this terrible, torturous existence, I wish I could just die in peace, never suffer again and forget about it all. In an existence so cruel and pointless non-existence truly would be the only relief for me, I only hope for nothingness, I only hope to be permanently unaware, I'd never wish for existence and I'd always prefer to die, for me personally ceasing to exist is always preferable to prolonging the suffering just to end up way more tormented.

Peace for me could never exist in the terrible, tragic mistake that is existence but rather the only peace for me lies in never suffering again, it'll always feel so horrible how I simply cannot just free myself from this existence in peace to prevent and escape from suffering. All I wish for is peace from this existence I never would have wished for, I just wish for the permanent absence of all pain and suffering and the way I see it existence truly does just bring suffering, to be conscious in this existence will always be a burden to me. I see human existence as a mistake, it's something I'd never wish for but rather something I'd only ever wish for peace from, the peace I wish for is such that only non-existence can bring me, I'd never wish to experience anything at all, something as dreadful and harmful as existence that just causes all this endless suffering and cruelty is something I'd prefer to stay permanently unaware of no matter what.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'll always find it deeply undesirable to exist.
I truly will always find it so undesirable to exist no matter what, I wish to just never exist again and forget about it all but of course the suffering just continues instead with me hoping and wishing to be gone. I'd always prefer to die, for me death is the only peace and relief, I'll only ever be hoping for freedom from this cruel, torturous existence, to me existing means suffering and I'll suffer as long as I exist yet to die means to never suffer again, all I hope for is to be permanently unconscious of this existence that just caused harm.

I'll always find it a burden to exist and it's a burden so futile that just causes endless amounts of suffering, to exist will always be so undesirable to me and as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for non-existence, only ceasing to exist can solve what I ultimately have a problem with which is existence itself as after all if I don't exist then I cannot suffer. All suffering is ultimately as a result of existence itself and I'd never wish for any of the suffering this existence causes but rather I just wish for nothingness, I wish for no more pain, no more suffering, existing under all circumstances will always be something so undesirable to me and I truly was never meant for any of this. I wish to just erase my existence so it's like I never suffered at all, human existence will always feel like the most cruel, painful mistake to me, it's something I wish I was never forced into more than anything as I just find existing so deeply undesirable and it terrifies me how a human can exist for so long. I personally just wish for nothingness which is why I suffer so much from how I cannot just have the option to free myself from this undesirable existence in peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existing is suffering to me.
No matter what I'll always see existing as just being suffering, it's suffering so pointless and unnecessary that serves no function but to torment existing beings all for the sake of it and what is so cruel and terrible is how there is no limit as to how unbearable the suffering can get and I'll suffer as long as I exist. Simply just existing causes me to suffer and as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for peace from all the suffering, I wish to permanently cease existing where all is gone and forgotten about for me where I finally cannot experience anything at all.

All I wish for is to be permanently unaware of this torturous, meaningless existence that just brings suffering, there's just so much cruelty in existing, I'd always prefer to die no matter what in fact ceasing to exist is all I've ever wished for as after all if I'm dead then I cannot suffer in any way and all is finally gone, having to wake again will always be such a torturous, futile burden to me. I wish I never existed more than anything, never existing truly would have saved me from all this suffering, I really was never meant for any of this and what terrifies me is how this existence can continue for so much longer, personally I just want nothingness, I'd never wish for any of this suffering, I just want to finally die in peace instead and never suffer ever again, existing will always be just suffering to me and I've suffered so much for far too long. It'll always feel so dreadful to exist, all I hope is for death to take away all the suffering and finally bring me peace, for me peace truly could only ever exist in non-existence, in an existence so torturous and futile ceasing to exist really would be the only relief for me, it's all I hope for.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only seeing non-existence as desirable.
No matter what I truly could only ever see non-existence as desirable for me as after all if I don't exist then I cannot suffer in any way and to be permanently unable to suffer is all I'll ever hope for, I just want death to bring me peace from all the suffering and cruelty in this meaningless, torturous existence. I was never meant to exist and never should have existed at all, to be conscious in this existence capable of suffering to unlimited amounts is such a cruel, painful burden to me, I'll always find it so burdensome having to wake again and experience anything at all, personally all I wish for is nothingness.

I just wish for some peace and for me peace could only ever exist in never suffering again, I'd never wish for the cruelty and futility of existing as a human where there's all this pain all for the sake of it rather all I wish for is to simply die and forget about it all, I just want all to b gone and forgotten about for me. I've personally never wished for exisrence and saw no value and no point to it rather I just saw existence as something that just caused suffering all for the sake of it tormenting existing beings, the way I see it existence truly does just cause harm which is why I only see non-existence as desirable as after all only in death am I safe from all suffering and there is no limit as to how much one can suffer. I just see existence as the most horrific, terrible tragedy, it's something I'd never see as desirable but rather something I just want peace from, I just wish for death to take away all my suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

No limit as to how much one can suffer in this existence.
And that is why existence is something so horrific to me, there's literally no limit as to how unbearable it can get, there's no limit as to how much one can be tortured in this existence I always saw as so futile anyway, I'd always prefer to not exist as only then am I safe from all harm and suffering, only non-existence could ever be desirable to me as after all only once I no longer exist am I unable to suffer. The way I see it to exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing way worse torture at any moment, I'd never wish for the painful, torturous burden of existing as a conscious being capable of suffering to unlimited extents in this existence I always saw as a terrible, tragic mistake in the first place.

It terrifies me how there's no limit as to how much agony one can feel with an existing being capable of feeling such immense unbearable pain and it can always get way more unbearable, it's horrifying to think of the amount of suffering that exists in this reality it truly is beyond comprehension, only non-existence can bring me safety from suffering, harm and torture which is why it always feels so horrible to me how I cannot just have the option to painlessly cease existing in peace. I'd personally prefer to avoid existence no matter what, I could personally never see value to suffering in this existence that was unnecessary just waiting to die anyway, to me existence itself will always be the true problem and I'll only be at peace once I no longer exist, for me non-existence truly is peace, for me never existing again truly would be the only relief, I'll always see it as deeply undesirable to exist at all, I'd never wish for something as cruel and harmful as existence that just causes endless amounts of suffering all for the sake of it rather I just wish to die in peace and finally forget about it all.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only non-existence can solve everything for me.
It truly is all that can solve everything for me as after all if I'm dead then I cannot experience anything at all and this existence is no longer my problem, the absence of existence is all I personally see as desirable, I'd always prefer to not exist as after all there is no suffering in non-existence yet no limit as to how unbearable this existence can get that I saw as so meaningless and futile just leading to decay and death anyway. In non-existence nothing can matter to me, there is no need for anything and all is finally gone, non-existence solves everything as after all it removes what is the ultimate cause of all problems which is existence itself, in fact to me existence itself will always be the ultimate problem, all I personally wish for is to never exist again.

I see the absence of suffering as something positive for me, I just wish to be permanently unconscious, I just wish to simply cease existing and never exist again, to me existing truly is just suffering all for the sake of it and I'd always prefer to be unaware of it no matter what, non-existence is all I'll ever hope and wish for, ceasing to exist would be the solution for me personally. I just don't see value and benefit to being burdened with this existence rather I see it as the opposite, I see existence itself as just an unnecessary harm that causes endless amounts of suffering all for the sake of it, if I die I'm unable to suffer in any way which is why all I hope for is to cease existing, I just don't have any interest in suffering in general and would prefer to not suffer at all, human existence just feels like a mistake to me.

 

[FuneralCry]

Always preferring nothingness.
Personally I'd always prefer eternal nothingness over suffering in this cruel, torturous existence, to me human existence just feels like a terrible mistake, I just wish I could erase my existence so it's like I never suffered at all and the fact that I cannot just painlessly cease existing so I can finally be at peace will always feel so horrible to me. There's so much cruelty in how painless death is denied even know existence is just meaningless, unnecessary suffering with no limit as to how much agony one can feel and it's all for the sake of it anyway, nothingness truly is always preferable to me than being burdened with this futile, dreadful existence that just causes suffering and so much pain.

To me non-existence is peace, it's the only relief for me, it's all I see as ideal, under no circumstances would I wish to suffer in this existence rather I'd prefer to avoid existence no matter what, I see nothing desirable about suffering in this existence and never would do rather I see existence as something so terrible, existence truly does just cause harm tormenting existing beings until they die. In an existence so harmful with so much cruelty death really would be the only relief for me and I just prefer nothingness in general, I'd prefer the peace of never suffering again, never experiencing anything again, never spending another second burdened with consciousness than prolonging all this pointless suffering just to die in agony from old age. What is so horrific is how there is no limit as to how unbearable the torture of existing can get, I only wish and hope for peace from all the suffering, death truly us all that's positive for me, there's just so much cruelty in this terrible, torturous existence, I just want to die in peace and forget about it all.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'd rather prevent and avoid suffering.
Personally I'd rather prevent and avoid suffering than prolong it just to end up way more tormented, I just don't see any value and benefit to suffering in this cruel, meaningless existence but rather existence is something I'd prefer to avoid no matter what, I'd never wish for the cruelty and futility of existing as a human rather I see human existence as such a terrible mistake that just causes endless amounts of suffering and harm.

I wish to die as only then will I be unable to suffer, I'd rather not suffer at all than be conscious and aware wishing and waiting to die anyway, only non-existence could ever be desirable to me, I just wish for peace from the torturous, pointless burden of human existence and for me peace truly could only ever exist in never suffering again. I've suffered too much for too long in this existence I never would have wished for and never would have chosen, to me existence really is the problem as after all it's the source of all suffering and without existence one cannot suffer in any way.
I'd never wish to suffer in this existence rather I'd prefer to avoid suffering by ceasing to exist, I wish for non-existence as only when I no longer exist will there be no suffering, only when I cease existing will the suffering go away for me, I suffer simply from being awake and what terrifies me is how there is no limit as to how unbearable the suffering can get. I'd rather prevent suffering than prolong it just to end up tortured by old age, personally I find it horrific how a human can suffer for so long, I wish I could just choose to cease existing in peace and never suffer ever again, it'll always feel so cruel to me how I cannot just painlessly free myself from this existence to prevent all unnecessary suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

Cruelty of how painless death made inaccessible.
There's so much cruelty in how painless death is made inaccessible to escape from and prevent unnecessary, pointless suffering in an existence that just leads to decay and death anyway. It'll always feel so horrible to me how I cannot just have the option to painlessly die in peace even know I see existence itself as the true problem, I see it as deeply undesirable to exist at all and I see human existence as the most cruel, torturous burden that just causes suffering all for the sake of it with no limit as to how much agony one can feel. But I personally see so much cruelty in how there's so much suffering to even try and cease existing in the first place, I find it so horrific how trying to die can go wrong and lead to way worse torture as a result, I see so much cruelty in how there's no acceptance towards preferring non-existence over all this suffering all for the sake of in an existence I just saw as a terrible, tragic mistake.

I wish I could just simply choose to not exist and never suffer ever again but of course I'm trapped in this reality where there's all this endless suffering just hoping and wishing to be gone, I just have no interest in suffering in this existence and see existence as something that just causes harm that I'd prefer to avoid no matter what, there's just so much cruelty in existing it's all just so terrible. I wish to just die in peace and forget about it all and as long as I exist I'll only ever wish to cease existing, I only hope for non-existence, only non-existence can solve what I ultimately see as the true problem which is existence itself and there's so much cruelty in how I cannot just painlessly choose to never suffer ever again.

 

[OldManOfTheLake]

It's relieving for me to see somebody else on this site being anti suffering. It feels like a lot of people are pro suffering and I'm going insane because of this. Thank you for your posts FC and for reminding me that other sane people in this world exist

My dad would torture animals for fun and is in prison. He will be over 100 years old before he is eligible for parole.

I just want you to know that despite people like him, there are some good people in the world. I have met plenty of them.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only hoping for dreamless, eternal sleep.
The peace of an eternal, dreamless sleep truly has been all I've ever personally wished for, I just have no interest in suffering in this cruel, torturous existence and I'm just not meant for it either, for me non-existence really is always preferable to suffering for the sake of it in this existence I just saw as a mistake in the first place. I'd always prefer to die but really I wish I never suffered at all, I never should have been forced into this existence but now I suffer and have suffered for so long I only hope for dreamless, eternal sleep.

I only hope for a permanent sleep free from all pain and suffering where all is finally gone and forgotten about for me, I only hope to never suffer ever again, there's no suffering in being permanently unconscious for all eternity yet no limit as to how unbearable the pain of existing can get which is why I only hope for dreamless, eternal sleep, I wish for non-existence to take away all the suffering and finally bring me peace, for me peace truly could only ever exist in never suffering again. I see no peace in the pointless struggle and suffering of human existence where there is all this terrible cruelty all for the sake of it, eternal sleep truly would solve everything for me as after all if I no longer exist then I cannot suffer in any way and this existence would be no longer my concern, as long as I exist I'll only ever hope for eternal sleep. I just wish for nothingness, I wish for peace from all the suffering, no matter what I'll always find it so dreadful to exist, I'd always prefer to not exist than prolong all this suffering just to be tortured by old age and finally die anyway.

 

[FuneralCry]

Only hoping to never suffer ever again.
I truly only ever hope to never suffer ever again, I've suffered so much for so long in this existence but of course I never should have suffered, existence just feels like a mistake to me, it's something deeply undesirable that I was never meant for that just brought me pain, all I wish and hope for is some peace and for me peace could only ever exist in never suffering again. I wish to fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and forget about it all, I wish for no more suffering and the way I see it existence truly does just cause nothing but suffering, it's suffering so pointless, unnecessary and all for the sake of it that just torments existing beings, existence truly is something so terrible to me.

I wish I could just die and forget about it all, I'd always prefer the peace of eternal nothingness where the suffering and cruelty of existence is no longer my concern but really I wish I could erase my existence so it's like I never suffered. I wish for the end of all suffering for me and I'll suffer as long as I exist, to never suffer ever again really is all I wish for, all I see as desirable is not existing for all eternity where I cannot suffer in any way, I only wish for non-existence as only then is there no more suffering, only then all is all gone and forgotten about for me. In an existence so cruel and torturous I only hope to never suffer ever again and I'll suffer as long as I exist, I'm so tired of suffering in this existence that I just saw as such a terrible, futile burden in the first place, non-existence truly is all that can bring me peace, I only hope for nothingness and it's all I'll wish for as long as I exist.

 

[SKDN]

Im just so tired of living.

I lived for 36 years and i know what life is about. I know what is going to happen. i know that it only gets worse as age goes. I dont like people and people dont like me. I only make bad decisions. There is no hope. Im doomed. Why keep suffering? I can end it right now. Right now. There is nothing that stops me from jumping from my apartment, 12 floor. Or just hang myself. Nothing stops me.
But i dont do it. Why? Because there is a dream that refuses to die, that days to me that things can get better. It gets weaker as time goes by, but is here. I need a weapon, that way i can do it without thinking too much. I need to kill that dream. I definetly want do die.

 

[FuneralCry]

So much cruelty in existing.
There truly is so much cruelty in existing, it's all just so terrible to me, I'd never wish for the cruel, torturous burden of human existence rather I just wish for nothingness, I'd prefer to avoid this existence no matter what that just causes so much suffering all for the sake of it. There's so much cruelty in how I cannot just have the option to painlessly die in peace even know this existence was imposed in the first place and I never would have chosen or wished for any of this.

I just want to painlessly cease existing instead of prolong the suffering in this existence where there's all this cruelty, I'd never wish for existence rather I just see it as something so terrible that just causes so much harm torturing existing beings until they die anyway and what is so horrific to me is how there's no limit as to how unbearable it can all get. To me existence truly is the most terrible tragedy, I'd never wish for existence but rather I only wish for the permanent absence if it where all is finally gone for me, there's just so much cruelty in existing, I wish I could just die in peace and forget about it all. Death truly would solve everything for me as after all there's no cruelty and no suffering in non-existence rather all is forgotten about for me instead, to be permanently unconscious and never suffer again truly is all I see as desirable. In an existence where there's so much cruelty all for the sake of it death truly would be the only relief for me, I'd always prefer to forget about this existence, it'll always feel so cruel how I simply cannot just have the option to peacefully die and never suffer again.

 

[FuneralCry]

Painless death would save me from all future suffering.
It truly would save me from all future suffering in this existence I just saw as a terrible mistake in the first place, I'd always prefer to die painlessly than suffer in this cruel, torturous existence, for me peace truly could only ever lie in non-existence where all is gone and forgotten about. Non-existence really is all I see as desirable as after all if I'm dead I cannot suffer, I personally see no value in suffering in this existence that just leads to decay and death anyway, there's so much cruelty and suffering in existing which is why I only wish for death, I only wish for a painless death to take all the suffering away and finally bring me peace.

I'd prefer to prevent suffering than prolong it just to end up even more tormented, I find it horrific how there's no limit as to how much agony one can feel in this existence I always saw as so painful and hopeless, existence truly is just suffering all for the sake of it that serves no purpose but to torment existing beings and I just have no interest in suffering in this existence anyway. I'd rather avoid existence and all the harm it causes, for me ceasing to exist truly would be suffering prevention, it'd be the way for me to find safety from all suffering, I see nothing desirable about prolonging the suffering this existence causes just to be tortured in agony from old age and I see it as all so futile anyway. I'd always prefer to die as only then am I safe from all cruelty and suffering with this existence no longer my problem, all I wish for is to be permanently unconscious incapable of suffering in any way which is why it causes me so much pain how I cannot just have the option to die painlessly to finally escape from an existence that I never would have chose that just caused nothing but suffering in the first place.

 

[FuneralCry]

Painless death really would solve everything for me.
It truly would do as after all if I don't exist then I cannot suffer in any way, ceasing to exist would solve everything for me as it removes what I ultimately see as the true problem which is existence itself. I'd always prefer to not exist as after all there are no disadvantages to not existing, only in non-existence am I incapable of suffering in any way incapable of feeling any pain with nothing being able to harm me at all, there's no suffering in being permanently unconscious with all gone and forgotten about instead yet there is no limit as to how much agony one can feel in this existence I always saw as so futile and unnecessary anyway. Ceasing to exist would solve everything for me in an existence there was never a need for at all, and all existence does is just create suffering all for the sake of it that serves no function but to torment existing beings until death takes all away for them anyway.

I'd personally never see value in suffering in this cruel, meaningless existence rather I'd always prefer to avoid such no matter what, for me death is the only peace, what appeals to me about ceasing to exist is that if I'm dead then for me it'll be like I never suffered at all as I'll be permanently unconscious, for me peace could only ever lie in being unaware for all eternity. I just wish to fall into an eternal, dreamless sleep and never think or feel anything again and what comforts me about death is that I won't be able to at all, to exist as a human capable of suffering to unlimited extents is something so terrible to me, I'll always see existence as the problem which is why all I wish and hope is for painless death to solve everything for me.

 

[FuneralCry]

The imposition of existence causes endless amounts of suffering.
It truly does cause endless amounts of suffering which is so cruel and terrible to me, more than anything I wish this existence was never imposed, I wish I was never burdened with something as cruel and futile as existence, to me human existence truly does feel like a mistake, it feels like just suffering all for the sake of it until one decays from age and is tormented by very old age. I see existing as a meaningless and unnecessary process of just waiting to die and it's one I'd never wish for, I'd never wish for the cruelty and futility of suffering in this existence where chance so senselessly determines everything and what is so horrible is how existing can easily get way more unbearable causing so much more torment and agony as a result.

I wish this existence was never imposed as it would have saved me from all this suffering, I wish I never suffered, not suffering truly is all I see as desirable and there's so much suffering in this existence, in fact I suffer just from being awake. All I see as ideal is being permanently unconscious where I'm safe from all suffering and harm, existence truly is the most futile and torturous imposition that just causes pain and I find it so tragic how this existence was imposed even know it isn't like I could suffer from never existing at all. Only never existing at all is true perfection to me, I personally see no benefit to suffering in this existence but rather I'd prefer to avoid existence and the endless cruelty and suffering it causes no matter what, existence is the problem to me as it's the source of all suffering and it's a problem that only ceasing to exist can bring me relief from.