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annasplight

annasplight

i can’t go on!
Aug 6, 2024
62
TW: SA mention

Well. Today was shit. It's entirely my fault. I let a guy get me drunk. I don't know what to say or do.

I'm so fucking stupid. He kissed me so many times and I cannot wipe the feeling off my lips. I can't wipe the feeling off my cheek, or my neck. I want to scrub my face 'till it's raw.

I just want to die. I always get into such bad situations, maybe this is my karma. I know some people irl are happy this happened to me. I'm shaking.
My friends scolded me for drinking with my health issues, and I can't help but feel guilt for worrying them. I made it clear that I was only hanging out with this guy, and he repeated it back to me several times. I thought he meant it.
I wish I knew how to stand up for myself more.

i'm so dumb.
 
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LunarLight

LunarLight

i'm a loser, a failure
Apr 3, 2024
1,363
Hi Anna,
I'm so sorry this happened to you. It's not your fault even if you drank, it's his. He doesn't have the right to do such things to you.
I hope you'll get better soon. Sending you love and hugs. 🫂
 
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wondering&wandering

wondering&wandering

Too often I think about the nature of thinking...
Jan 12, 2024
265
I'm so so sorry to hear this happened to you. What that man did was inexcusable regardless of your decision to drink or not.

While I understand why you'd think it's your fault for being in a position of vulnerability to get SA'd, do not blame yourself. It's hard to understand how our actions might lead to something horrible. All you need to ask yourself is this: if you knew being drunk with that man would lead to being SA'd, would you still do it? If the answer is no, then you simply didn't know better because how can one know? How can one live such a life where each action must be evaluated for any sort of harm to behalf upon oneself? That's no life.

Perhaps you can find a friend who can be there for you when you're vulnerable because you shouldn't disallow yourself from being allowed to be vulnerable, although I'm sure you might be thinking that you never want to be vulnerable again.

It's just the world we live in, unfortunately. Also, if you ever want to talk, feel free to message me in anyway.

Regardless, I wish you peace.
 
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bitofftoomuch

bitofftoomuch

hold onto those who accept your messy self
Jul 1, 2024
148
No it is not your fault that a piece of shit assaulted you. And your friends should be supporting you instead of giving you shit about drinking. I'd call them out on it, honestly. You did nothing wrong. It is entirely his fault. I don't care how much you drank or what your background is. You're the one the world failed today, not the other way around.
 
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NearlyIrrelevantCake

NearlyIrrelevantCake

The Cake Is A Lie
Aug 12, 2021
1,574
It's not your fault. A decent human being wouldn't assault someone if they were drunk, high, etc.
 
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uniqueusername4

uniqueusername4

died a long time ago
Aug 13, 2023
199
The 10 year anniversary of the first day I got SA'd was 10/02 (yesterday). I thought it was my fault too then for putting myself in that situation. It was not my fault and isn't yours. There should be no situation where you get assaulted, and it is the assaulters fault for doing it.
 
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