Have you ever considered murder?

[noname223]

Me never I am just here to judge people if people are honest and open about it.

Serious answer. I never really considered murder. There was the short thought of revenge to my family. But it was more like they should kill themselves out of guilt when I ctb. But I think this thought was rather immature. I don't want that anymore. Not at all.

I am scared to fuck up suicide. Murder seems to be similar difficult. And in contrast to suicide most people want to avoid getting caught. Prison sounds scary. I think it would be a different layer of torture for me. And the guilt and ethical issues it would eat me alive.

 

[mattoman]

Never. I am okay with the thought of hurting myself, but not with the thought of hurting others.

Imo murder and suicide can't even be comparable, since committing suicide is kind of like escaping something but murdering someone is just pure evil.

 

[Forever Sleep]

No.

 

[OptingOutSmiling]

Nope

 

[noname223]

In a past pole of me some people admitted to murder and some other crimes. We were not sure though whether it was only a joke.
People seem to like Luigi Mangione though.

 

[SmoolPepe]

No, cant say that I have besides self-harm.
I may not agree with some people on certain things, I may not like them one bit, I may even hate some people or find them evil or disgusting or whatever, but I never entertained the idea of doing something like that.
I just want to see people be happy (as long as they dont hurt anyone else), even if I cant obtain what makes me happy, it still makes me feel a bit better if others can.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

As a crime lover I get tripped up on this. Like why am I so intrigued? But at least I know I'm more intrigued by the psychology BEHIND the murder than the act itself. I notice I've wondered why people get caught, or didn't do this or that, to avoid getting caught; and then I imagine what should have been done to avoid capture. However in these scenarios I envision of myself, I skip the murder part and go to the forensic parts. So while that may come off as a yes, it's really a no lol. I'm not interested.

 

[Forever Sleep]

People seem to like Luigi Mangione though.

I think we can be fascinated with or even sympathise with/ admire some criminals. That doesn't necessarily mean we have a strong desire to do what they did.

Sometimes I wonder if it's just a fascination with the idea of feeling that free. I have a grizzly fascination with true crime. I don't think that can be all that healthy. I can truly say that I have no desire to break the law myself. I suppose I'm just grimly fascinated with how extreme some lives are. Like @ms_beaverhousen said though- it's more an intrigue with their psychology. What drives criminals to act like that? How is it people around them don't suspect? Or, do they? For me- weirder still is when abuse victims won't leave. It's a whole mixture of feeling sad for them, horrified by what they went through but also kind of perplexed that they put up with it.

 

[yowai]

When I was like 13-14 I had horrible relationship with my parents and wished they die, even thought about poisoning them I obviously didn't do it and I can't imagine it now, I was so messed up then and wanted to get away from then. That's the only time I ever thought about something like that

 

[Dai]

People seem to like Luigi Mangione though.

If he was an unattractive incel it'd be a completely different narrative lol. But yeah it's a bit surprising with how many people are so openly thrilled about the murder.

imo most if not all people have or will fantasize about murder (whether they admit or not), but to seriously consider it is a different story.

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

I've decided that it can "be healthy" to have a morbid fascination with crime. I've watched A LOT of professionals' give their opinions from all kinds of descriptive job titles pertaining to crime. They all seem like perfectly functional adults with full lives who happen to have chosen a really dark field of work. The thing is they're HELPING people by contributing and solving crime. They often describe crime scenes like puzzles, which I understand but that's not my viewpoint. They don't enjoy the depravity of the crime and neither do we as crime buffs. It's that train wreck phenomenon of can't look away. We can't imagine what it would take to do such depraved things so we're so perplexed that it amazes us. That's what we like I think, or at least a part of it and why I don't feel gross anymore as a consumer. Plus there's the good conquerors all effect, like the greater the villain the better the hero. So the worse the crime, the more victorious that it's resolved.

There's also something visceral and primitive tat goes back centuries in our DNA because we don't have to eat each other or fight for food or to mate, so how has that instinct not evolved and disappeared like a normal adaptive trait? I mean it never will, but our crime loving brains can't comprehend that so we're hooked for life lol. Just stuff like that. It also helps that I'm disgusted by murder when it comes down to it, so I feel confident that I'm not psychotic in that sense.
But like you were saying, I hope there isn't a certain voyeurism that is apart of what peaks my interest. I know I'd be too afraid to do anything, and would go tug on a nearby officer's shirt and tell on myself, so that's not really comforting lol. I've thought of starting a crime thread btw.
But Americans can understand when I say, if tempted it's probably best to go with a "Just Say No." approach :)

 

[Apathy79]

I think I could probably do it in self defence or defence of someone else whose life was at risk. I've also often asked myself, as I used to advocate for euthanasia to be legalised, whether I would be able to do it myself if asked, and I think I could. I also think I'd be capable of administering the death penalty. There are contexts where I think it is the right thing to do and I think I could carry it out. But not as a planned murder like a hit or a serial killer - not the type people are interested in reading about the psychology behind it.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

When I was in 3rd grade I got sent to the principal's office because we were supposed to write a 'How-to' essay and the subject of my How-to Essay was 'How to Kill Your Worst Enemy'. My worst enemy at the time was this other kid who kept teasing me and belittling me every chance he got. I don't remember what exactly I wrote in this essay but I remember I had a very clinical approach to it which is why I didn't think it was all that bad. I guess I must have wanted to kill him though. Eventually this problem got resolved when I punched him in the arm and got suspended from school for a day for it. For context, I was and still am incredibly weak so even my hardest punch should have felt like nothing especially for him considering he was pretty high level in his Taekwondo classes apparently. Everyone saw how lame he was for fake-crying after getting punched by me because they knew there's no way he could have been hurt by that.

 

[Thisisnotaname]

I killed a frog one time in mid school. That's all I swear


Edit for @Dai , it was in biology

 

[Dai]

I killed a frog one time in mid school. That's all I swear


Edit for @Dai , it was in biology

Spoiler

jk

 

[Pluto]

 

[Namelesa]

I have considered murder at a lot of points in my life. First was with teachers in school cus how much trauma I I got from it.

I have considered killing the person in my second relationship cus of my fear of abandonment being so overwhelming and that so that he would not be able to "leave" me. I mostly got this idea from Jeffrey Dahmer as I thought I could maybe use his way of coping with his fear abandonment to cope with mine. Thankful I don't think about doing this anymore but some alternative universe probably has me being Jeffrey Dahmer 2.

I also considered to kill that partner's mother cus she is very neglectful and abusive to him. I absolutely hate the way she treats him.

Finally I have considered killing the family members I live with so that I could escape the house they trap me in to maybe be able to ctb. I have not done this mostly cus I don't want my dog to deal with the murder of my family members and cus to me even if I hate my family members for trapping me here, they don't deserve something as bad as being murdered.

 

[LostLily]

just murdering myself. Because I don't have the right to take anyone else's life.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I do think about murder in the pro mortalist sense of pressing a hypothetical red button that were to immediately and painlessly end all sentient life on this planet. If such a button were ever granted to me, I would press this button immediately. As for individuals, one time, out of rage of my situation, I wished that I could kill my family members so that I would no longer be under their control and I can finally ctb. Of course I'm not actually going to murder them but I'd be lying if I said that them being dead would allow me to finally ctb which is what I want for myself. Also, other times, I wish that those who were in power and act like they're all superior to everybody get killed so that they realise in their final moments of life that they are just as irrelevant and meaningless as everybody else is since death is the ultimate equaliser.

Aside from that, I don't really think that murdering individuals has any benefit or use to it

 

[Thisisnotaname]

 

[wishingiwasok]

As a crime lover I get tripped up on this. Like why am I so intrigued? But at least I know I'm more intrigued by the psychology BEHIND the murder than the act itself. I notice I've wondered why people get caught, or didn't do this or that, to avoid getting caught; and then I imagine what should have been done to avoid capture. However in these scenarios I envision of myself, I skip the murder part and go to the forensic parts. So while that may come off as a yes, it's really a no lol. I'm not interested.

I also am fascinated by true crime and have worried that there's some latent homicidal instinct in me lol. But I don't want to hurt people I just want to stop hurting. There have been moments in the thick of abuse I couldn't escape that I wanted the other person to die so they stopped hurting me. But if I was capable of defending myself I would have been able to get away and then it wouldn't have been necessary...

 

[ShatteredSerenity]

I have been in a situation where I thought I might be pushed to kill someone who was doing very, very bad things. I had just graduated high school and I ended up living in an anarchist compound in a remote, rural part of the country. Drug use and alcoholism were rampant and people were dirt poor, there was a lot of hopelessness. It was a perfect environment for predators to take advantage of the weak and downtrodden, and the combination of remoteness, corruption, and anarchist mentality meant the rule of law was practically nonexistant.

The leader of the compound took a liking to me and he started letting me in on more of his activities. He openly bragged about sexually assaulting children. I wasn't entirely sure I believed him until he arranged for one of their parents to offer me his daughters to do whatever I wanted. He showed me a safe where he stored drugs, and I can only assume part of his income was distribution. I think he was also using drugs to control people. He tried to control me by threatening to kill me and hide my body. His girlfriend admitted to me that he had molested her since she was a young girl, and she wanted to get away from him but he threatened her. He had weapons and told people he was a former Army ranger.

I didn't know what to do, because other than the crazy leader the compound was a pretty cool place and I was really bonding with the other people there. I felt like I would need to arm myself for self-defence if I stayed, given the threats. I realized that if I had a weapon I very well might feel obligated to kill that man if he took things too far, because there was no one else to stand up to him and he was destroying lives. At that point I realized I had to leave because I was in way over my head.

In the end fate stepped in to take care of him: a tractor tire exploded next to his head and caused massive brain injuries. He's still able to function but on a very reduced level. After the explosion debilitated him the law also caught up to him and he was charged with assault. His son took over the compound and took it in a positive direction.

 

[fishlover]

yes, many times. when my mom was hitting me a lot, i would fantasize killing her in her sleep and getting away with it. i wanted my younger brother dead too, sometimes still do- for a lot of reasons. wanting to kill out of resentment.. but ive wanted to kill out of love, too. its a bit hard to explain.
im guilty of taking my anger out on small animals- something i regret.
sometimes i think about how if i werent a flimsy underweight girl i would have actually done something by now..

 

[lamy2006]

i have.
Sometimes I wonder, how different I'd be if I was in America.
but I don't think I could ever actually go through with murder, so it'll remain just thoughts in my head.

 

[3/4Dead]

What, like out of anger? Sure i've figuratively said id kill someone but I don't think i've ever actually had a serious thought about murdering anyone. Wouldn't really wanna do that to anyone.

 

[SVEN]

Only of myself.

 

[TheShadowKing]

Yeah every day but the only one ima realistically kill is myself lol

 

[savory]

Only once and by the time I reached him I turned into putty.

 

[flesh object]

When I was younger, around 8 to 10 years old. I used to fantasize about murdering my father in his sleep, and even brought it up to my mother as a casual question. It has been quite awhile since my Father has died of natural causes, and time seems to be heavy yet weightless. I do not consciously remind myself that he is dead; rather, he is just gone for the moment. I had no idea how it could be seen as anything other than right. I frequently have moments where I recall the past, and once again fantasizing about murdering my father. One of my biggest regrets was not taking that chance to - and it seems to be plaguing my mind in the present.

 

[33-vertebrae]

Yes.