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fazzle

Member
Sep 13, 2025
5
Hi folks. Thank you for including me in this community. I've been reading posts here for months, never brave enough to register and contribute until now.

Quick summary. I'm in my 40s, male, never had a serious relationship or close friends and not really that close to family. I've been alone all my life, lived alone for over 18years, and been relatively content being by myself. Fairly good career, I don't worry about money at the moment. It feels like I've been living a life to work and please others. I'm tired of it.

I've had suicidal thoughts since I was 14, I've never spoken to anyone about it. This is the first time I'm even writing about it. I don't even think anyone suspects I feel this way.

I live in the UK. I've decided my time to leave is soon. I'll never have a family of my own, and I don't think aging further and living in the world as it is is for me. I've been reading posts about SN methods for a while and acquired 500g very easily online through what seems like a legit seller from Europe within 2 weeks (I will not share details, but I'm surprised how easy it was to obtain). I've been staring at the bottle for the last few hours as this could really be it for me, the reality is setting in. I want to test it first, sort some affairs and make a plan. I think I have 6months max. Thank you for having me here, I hope to contribute here in the best way I can in that time.
 
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Zardoz

Zardoz

Peace
May 21, 2025
182
Thanks for sharing. (Also UK middle-aged M). Feel free to reach out any time.
 
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unluckysadness

unluckysadness

Mage
Jul 9, 2025
538
Welcome here and sorry that you're suffering so much
 
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darksouls

darksouls

Enlightened
May 10, 2025
1,352
👋 hello and welcome to sasu
 
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
13,000
Welcome to SaSu! 👋
 
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M

metfan647

Member
Jun 12, 2025
25
Welcome

Another Brit here approaching middle age.

Do you plan to quit your job before? I'm likely to do so to keep a lower profile.
 
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F

fazzle

Member
Sep 13, 2025
5
Hi there, I've been contemplating this one also, but I think I'll quit soon for the same reason, I want to just slip out the side door with the least amount of attention. I've been fortunate in my career, probably the only thing I got right in my life, but what's the point in hating the 9-5 everyday, living for the weekend and having money but never being in a mindset to enjoy spending it. I hate the system we've all been coached into from birth.
Welcome

Another Brit here approaching middle age.

Do you plan to quit your job before? I'm likely to do so to keep a lower profile.
 

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