Help How to find motivation?

[Enigma25]

I don't have the motivation to keep being alive but I'm trying to fight it.
I'm very passionate about the gym but I can't bring myself to go and that TOO is making me depressed. It's a month and some change until I can bring home my puppy too. This is honestly hard.

Also I've tried having a gym buddy but I've had quite literally zero progress. I even posted it in the work group chat. I can't be mad at them for not wanting to join me but guys I'm trying and its reinforcing the thought that I don't matter and shouldn't be here.

 

[Enigma25]

I am passionate and knowledgeable, but if I'm being transparent, lifting while depressed is hard. My apathy/sadness affects my strength, and then I don't hit goals and then I get more depressed. Also, part of why I'm suicidal is that I'm so tired of being alone. I've been going to that gym forever and I'm telling you I get stared at and people don't even smile when they talk to me or vice versa.

And also. I won't lie. I'm a stress eater (ADHD too), so when I'm depressed I don't eat right. I have everything to meal prep. I simply haven't. I'm worried I I'll lose my passion for it

 

[Enigma25]

guys I don't know what happen but the chats disappeared and I can only see my own. What do?

 

[Buh-bye!]

guys I don't know what happen but the chats disappeared and I can only see my own. What do?

Hey, I actually was in a hurry yesterday so I deleted my replies as I left. I did post stuff on my profile for you to see if it were to be seen. I just delete stuff like that sometimes.

Anyhow, how you doing today ?

 

[Crematoryy]

I'm sorry you're lacking motivation. My dopamine receptors are damaged by overstimulation. So I spend hours doing nothing due to lack of motivation.

 

[Diceroller90]

I like to think of depression like alcoholism. Both are genetic and both require reworking your life to fix. Both also have very similar ways of curing. Depression is a void in your life. Humans have an instinctual need for a higher power. This does not inherently mean God with a capital G. Alcoholics Anonymous will tell you that anything you place higher than yourself serves this purpose. (I am Christian myself, but I am trying to write this post as agnostically as possible). When we lack a higher power we become aimless, demotivated, and depressed.

So first things first, you need to find something larger than yourself. This can be a loved one who has been standing beside you this whole time, your hometown, a passion (cooking), a good cause (animal wellfare), and yes even Church.

Motivation comes from believing your actions go above yourself. That what you do is needed, that you are needed. So you need to find something or someone that needs you.

 

[Enigma25]

Hey, I actually was in a hurry yesterday so I deleted my replies as I left. I did post stuff on my profile for you to see if it were to be seen. I just delete stuff like that sometimes.

Anyhow, how you doing today ?

Hello! I am a bit disappointed I woke up, but I am here. How are you?

I'm sorry you're lacking motivation. My dopamine receptors are damaged by overstimulation. So I spend hours doing nothing due to lack of motivation.

Damaged??? How? (If i can ask)

I like to think of depression like alcoholism. Both are genetic and both require reworking your life to fix. Both also have very similar ways of curing. Depression is a void in your life. Humans have an instinctual need for a higher power. This does not inherently mean God with a capital G. Alcoholics Anonymous will tell you that anything you place higher than yourself serves this purpose. (I am Christian myself, but I am trying to write this post as agnostically as possible). When we lack a higher power we become aimless, demotivated, and depressed.

So first things first, you need to find something larger than yourself. This can be a loved one who has been standing beside you this whole time, your hometown, a passion (cooking), a good cause (animal wellfare), and yes even Church.

Motivation comes from believing your actions go above yourself. That what you do is needed, that you are needed. So you need to find something or someone that needs you.

My last bastion is the dog Im getting soon. Beyond that, I am out of options, and also fed up searching for them,

 

[Diceroller90]

Hello! I am a bit disappointed I woke up, but I am here. How are you?

Damaged??? How? (If i can ask)

My last bastion is the dog Im getting soon. Beyond that, I am out of options, and also fed up searching for them,

A dog is a great example of this. That is a creature who will literally die without you. An animal who loves you completely. I read about the psychology of dogs and dogs find it hard to comprehend their masters are bad. If a master smacks their dog, the dog assumes they were in the wrong and just seeks to please you. Like they cannot comprehend someone they love being a bastard, that is how innocent they are. They wake up every day just hoping to make you smile. Did you know they will study you like a book? Look at your new dog when you get him/her. Even when she lays down, she will be watching you to see what you like and don't like so she can make you feel better more efficiently.

I think its great first, second, and even third step you are taking. If you want to go down the fourth step (which I will post now since I am planing on leaving SaSu within the next 10 days since I am recovering) I would expand on what you are doing. Not only help your dog, but help other dogs. Is there an animal shelter near you that you can volunteer at?

Not only are these places so in demand for help that you would make their day, but you would also make the day of all the animals there while also meeting people.

Humans are social creatures. Just like we need God (or a higher power), we also need interactions. Now sometimes we can be like an abused dog and be beaten down so many times we don't even want to take the gamble of social interactions so we retreat to our own sanctums, but even then there is a part of us that was to be seen and heard. I see this sometimes here where lots of confessed anti-social people will just post hoping someone will hear them. Being in a community provides us fulfillment, dopamine, and motivation. It helps us shoulder more weight since we know other people will help us pick it up.

 

[Buh-bye!]

Hello! I am a bit disappointed I woke up, but I am here. How are you?

Damaged??? How? (If i can ask)

My last bastion is the dog Im getting soon. Beyond that, I am out of options, and also fed up searching for them,

Hiya mate. I feel nothing, that's sort of messing with me. It's the birthday of someone i adored, i still do but can't seem to consciously feel it due to trauma or something. Why would you feel disappointed on waking up? Mental exhaustion ?

 

[Enigma25]

A dog is a great example of this. That is a creature who will literally die without you. An animal who loves you completely. I read about the psychology of dogs and dogs find it hard to comprehend their masters are bad. If a master smacks their dog, the dog assumes they were in the wrong and just seeks to please you. Like they cannot comprehend someone they love being a bastard, that is how innocent they are. They wake up every day just hoping to make you smile. Did you know they will study you like a book? Look at your new dog when you get him/her. Even when she lays down, she will be watching you to see what you like and don't like so she can make you feel better more efficiently.

I think its great first, second, and even third step you are taking. If you want to go down the fourth step (which I will post now since I am planing on leaving SaSu within the next 10 days since I am recovering) I would expand on what you are doing. Not only help your dog, but help other dogs. Is there an animal shelter near you that you can volunteer at?

Not only are these places so in demand for help that you would make their day, but you would also make the day of all the animals there while also meeting people.

Humans are social creatures. Just like we need God (or a higher power), we also need interactions. Now sometimes we can be like an abused dog and be beaten down so many times we don't even want to take the gamble of social interactions so we retreat to our own sanctums, but even then there is a part of us that was to be seen and heard. I see this sometimes here where lots of confessed anti-social people will just post hoping someone will hear them. Being in a community provides us fulfillment, dopamine, and motivation. It helps us shoulder more weight since we know other people will help us pick it up.

Love this, but I am a multifaceted individual. I'm fully aware a dog can't fix everything. I don't think there's enough

Hiya mate. I feel nothing, that's sort of messing with me. It's the birthday of someone i adored, i still do but can't seem to consciously feel it due to trauma or something. Why would you feel disappointed on waking up? Mental exhaustion ?

sorry you feel numb. I know what that's like. Feeling is normal, and it's ok to be sad today.

But disappointed I'm not dead, and disappointed in myself that I haven't made much of any progress.

 

[Buh-bye!]

sorry you feel numb. I know what that's like. Feeling is normal, and it's ok to be sad today.

But disappointed I'm not dead, and disappointed in myself that I haven't made much of any progress.

It feels good to read that, really. I am over it right now I belive. Birthday's over too [ 12:12 ] here.
Just let things come to you, let them take their time. In the meantime try not to indulge in anything that might make you feel pessimistic.
I want to get a dog too by the way. Can't, in my current condition.

 

[Enigma25]

It feels good to read that, really. I am over it right now I belive. Birthday's over too [ 12:12 ] here.
Just let things come to you, let them take their time. In the meantime try not to indulge in anything that might make you feel pessimistic.
I want to get a dog too by the way. Can't, in my current condition.

Glad you felt good. Im really trying, but its hard. Trying to get a gym buddy, getting the dog, but I'm depressed all the time. I don't really wanna exist. but I see now how selfish it is to involve you all in it. So while, I do wanna die, i gotta take a step back and see if I really wanna reinforce the idea that I have to do everything alone. Its a lot to think about, and then my bday, and then I only really have me, so theres no choice but to have my thoughts. I dunno I feel conflicted

 

[Diceroller90]

Love this, but I am a multifaceted individual. I'm fully aware a dog can't fix everything. I don't think there's enough

sorry you feel numb. I know what that's like. Feeling is normal, and it's ok to be sad today.

But disappointed I'm not dead, and disappointed in myself that I haven't made much of any progress.

A dog won't be enough, but like I said, it is a good first step. A foundation for you to build off of. Volunteering at an animal shelter was a possible idea to use after you absorb the motivation being a pet owner brings you. Or you can jump straight to it, it depends on the kind of person you are. Do you need to wade into the pool or do you jump right into the deep?

If you can give me some ideas of things you like(d?) I can help bounce some ideas.

Glad you felt good. Im really trying, but its hard. Trying to get a gym buddy, getting the dog, but I'm depressed all the time. I don't really wanna exist. but I see now how selfish it is to involve you all in it. So while, I do wanna die, i gotta take a step back and see if I really wanna reinforce the idea that I have to do everything alone. Its a lot to think about, and then my bday, and then I only really have me, so theres no choice but to have my thoughts. I dunno I feel conflicted

Just wanting to throw in. There is no selfishness in talking to people. You didn't drag me kicking and screaming to read your post. I chose to read it, I chose to volunteer advise. I am here since I want to be. You are not a burden.

 

[Enigma25]

A dog won't be enough, but like I said, it is a good first step. A foundation for you to build off of. Volunteering at an animal shelter was a possible idea to use after you absorb the motivation being a pet owner brings you. Or you can jump straight to it, it depends on the kind of person you are. Do you need to wade into the pool or do you jump right into the deep?

If you can give me some ideas of things you like(d?) I can help bounce some ideas.

Just wanting to throw in. There is no selfishness in talking to people. You didn't drag me kicking and screaming to read your post. I chose to read it, I chose to volunteer advise. I am here since I want to be. You are not a burden.

You're very supportive, thanks. But I am trying to rediscover what I love. I am not really good at anything though? So diving in doesn't usually work.

I like a lot of niche things though.

 

[Diceroller90]

You're very supportive, thanks. But I am trying to rediscover what I love. I am not really good at anything though? So diving in doesn't usually work.

I like a lot of niche things though.

Its a really tough question to answer. Like I would just look at a list of activities and go "nope, I know I will hate all of them."

Its tough. Its like trying to decide what you want to eat when you are full. Nothing sounds delicious. I ended up picking random things to try, didn't enjoy most of them, but I didn't hate them, and I ended up finding a few things I like. You sound like you have a better foundation than that since you have some (niche) interests. Do you want to share a few of them?

 

[Enigma25]

Its a really tough question to answer. Like I would just look at a list of activities and go "nope, I know I will hate all of them."

Its tough. Its like trying to decide what you want to eat when you are full. Nothing sounds delicious. I ended up picking random things to try, didn't enjoy most of them, but I didn't hate them, and I ended up finding a few things I like. You sound like you have a better foundation than that since you have some (niche) interests. Do you want to share a few of them?

I am very used to trying new things. Part of why I gotta go is because I am kinda tired of trying new things, as I only recently learned to love myself instead of what people want me to be. It's really weird to know what to do and also have experience on why it's a moot point

I like video games. but fantasy type stuff. Pokemon, Dead Cells, Cuphead, Bayonetta, Mario, Kirby, Tales of series, Shovel Knight.
I also like conspiracy theories (I dont believe them...all)
I like the gym
I like drawing - but that typically involves me sitting still, which is boring, so i don't do it unless i REALLY wanna do it.
I like to laugh
I like cartoons/anime

I go through phases but at my core its all the above

My issue is also that I cannot pretend to like something I do not like. Surface level conversation vexes me to no end. It is no ones fault. I am glad some people can talk about work at work. Its bad enough I have to come here 5/7 days a week. 8 hrs a day. Why the f*ck would I wanna talk about work?????? but I also don't find sports interesting. No ones fault. I get the appeal, but it isn't for me. I don't like reality tv ev.
History as a topic is boring unless Im observing social issues and trying to find out why. Most would consider me pretty weird. Theres more to these idiosyncrasies but regardless it leads to me being an outcast amongst outcast.

An old friend described me as such - "He's an open book, just written in another language"