
SecretDissociation
Suicide enthusiast
- Sep 11, 2022
- 181
I booked tickets. I booked tickets for Next Monday. I booked return tickets, I don't know if that's a mistake. I don't if booking a single would make me want to kill myself more. I don't know. I don't know if I'll wake up on Monday and cancel the trip. I don't know if I'll have the courage to throw myself off the cliff.
But I do know that I really really want to die. That I've this plan in my head for two years now. That I'm past the first hurdle of this plan. That now, all I need to do is overcome the survival instincts that beckons us to live. That when I jump all I need to do is not land on my feet. That I just need to have the back of my head hit the ground. That I can't survive this. That I don't want to survive this.
I read an article of an old man who's parachute failed, and he somehow survived with a broken hip and other broken bones. I just need to not do what he did. I need to find the highest point, jump and die.
But I do know that I really really want to die. That I've this plan in my head for two years now. That I'm past the first hurdle of this plan. That now, all I need to do is overcome the survival instincts that beckons us to live. That when I jump all I need to do is not land on my feet. That I just need to have the back of my head hit the ground. That I can't survive this. That I don't want to survive this.
I read an article of an old man who's parachute failed, and he somehow survived with a broken hip and other broken bones. I just need to not do what he did. I need to find the highest point, jump and die.