Discussion On the topic of minors registered to this forum.

[EmptyBottle]

Narcs and snitches always get a bad rap, not just kids but as adults too. "Hey it's not cool to rat on someone" and society tries to make you feel bad for telling on someone... except... if you were being raped or beaten and your neighbor saw it happening and could identify the assailant... you damn well know you'd want that neighbor to speak up and "rat" out your attacker.

Or if the neighbor discovers a creep is doing unspeakable things to children. Then the neighbor better speak up (otherwise they could get accusations of supporting kiddy fiddlers), and most neighbors will report those creeps.

 

[amerie]

Dear potential minors,
there are so many similar discord communities and several other sites available.
Please seek another site for support, STOP using this site until at least your 18th B'day (u can set a reminder for your 18th B'day if u wish).

If you are even considering signing up under a false age, know that users like me will feel hurt when we read news reports of under 18s dying thru knowledge they have got here and similar.

Your feelings are valid, regardless of age.

Remember, if/when we discover a user is under 18, the user will sadly have to be reported, and by stopping use of the site until you are 18, you won't feel the pain of being reported.

EmptyBottle

I'd also like to add that when you're a minor your brain is still developing, and the full scope of how your life will turn out is still in the literal beta stages. I mean I probably shouldn't say much because I joined this site when I was freshly 18, and I had decided by the age of 16 that I was likely going not make it for very long in life so I get feeling invalidated and annoyed on most venting spaces and seeing this site as a sanctuary, but I think it's a good idea to wait and figure things out to see if the drastic mindset of a lot of us on this site is worth adopting.

 

[Dejected 55]

I don't remember who it was, but in the short time (couple of months) I've been a member here, there was someone who posted about how they had "met" someone in a chat room somewhere (not here) that had "promised" if she would meet him and let him have sex with her that he would shoot her. I don't know whatever happened with that person, but we were all chiming in and saying how that meet-up was not a good idea at all for all the reasons.

It's hard to think like a child predator when you aren't one... but I have to think that a depressed underage person is like a dream target for a child predator. Kids are already vulnerable to be preyed upon, but when someone can pretend to be a caring authority figure... anyway, just another random reason that popped into my head of why it is a good idea not to let minors on here because there are sick adults who definitely will not be screened out who can just sit and wait for a minor to sneak through the cracks and pounce on their vulnerable state of mind.

 

[wondering&wandering]

I don't remember who it was, but in the short time (couple of months) I've been a member here, there was someone who posted about how they had "met" someone in a chat room somewhere (not here) that had "promised" if she would meet him and let him have sex with her that he would shoot her. I don't know whatever happened with that person, but we were all chiming in and saying how that meet-up was not a good idea at all for all the reasons.

It's hard to think like a child predator when you aren't one... but I have to think that a depressed underage person is like a dream target for a child predator. Kids are already vulnerable to be preyed upon, but when someone can pretend to be a caring authority figure... anyway, just another random reason that popped into my head of why it is a good idea not to let minors on here because there are sick adults who definitely will not be screened out who can just sit and wait for a minor to sneak through the cracks and pounce on their vulnerable state of mind.

Good points that I agree with. Which could also start a conversation about the Partners Megathread...

 

[rainwillneverstop]

considering this is how you were accused, it makes me wonder how the mods determined that I'm an adult~ xD

Just wondering, how do you handle users who joined as minors but are now adults? For context, I said happy birthday to a user celebrating their 19th birthday recently, but their account was made in late 2023, meaning that they made it when they were 17~ do you just ignore them ig? xD

That's still against rules, and should have been reported.

 

[Dejected 55]

Good points that I agree with. Which could also start a conversation about the Partners Megathread...

I would hope people are making age-appropriate connections there and that no minors are there. The last thing I would ever want is to inadvertently be in contact with someone who turned out to be underage, or even too young really. Sometimes you can tell by the way people write, but some kids write well for their age. I was always a good writer and people always thought I was older than I was back when I was a kid. Then there are some adults who have poor writing styles or some mental disability that affects their ability communicate and you might think they are younger than they are. Unless someone is standing right in front of you, online is harder to police.

That's still against rules, and should have been reported.

I don't know. The way the other person was describing it... it sounded like the person was 19 now and only through back-calculating is it obvious that means the person joined the site when they were underage. So a couple of things could be true... That person joined a couple of years ago as a minor and got away with it until they became legal age OR they were caught and banned and allowed to re-join. From the rules I read, I believe there is a contingency that says if you're caught underage your account is banned but you could come back when you are old enough.

Now, IF you see a person posting today who is underage today, then yes... you absolutely should report that to someone on the site. But if you find out today that someone was underage 2 years ago... that feels like a water-under-the-bridge situation.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

What is a minor? A minor is defined by law. Generally, 18+ is considered an adult and there's also 21+ when adults can finally do everything legally (e.g. alcohol, casino ... (country specific)).

Laws have to be followed, and this here is 18+ content.

It would be better to ask: Why minors become suicidal, why do they become depressed, why don't they receive the support they need from their parents, why do minors have to live in toxic (abusive) household and ultimately end up suicidal, why are they so hopeless? There're probably more things we can ask.

If those circumstances were better for minors they wouldn't even search for a place like SS. It's the same for adults - if the life of all adults was good, nobody would search for a place like SS.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I feel really bad for their situation. I can sympathise. I was suicidal as a minor. I was also/ am very square though. I perhaps might have lurked but, I wouldn't likely have made an account till I was officially able to. I try not to lie in general. I don't think I'd deceive a group of well meaning people to get what I wanted. No matter how much I wanted it.

Truthfully and very selfishly- It does bother me that they are here. Pretty much always, the most intense form of negativity the forum gets from journalists but also from intensely angry families is because young people/ minors are here and some even do end up committing suicide.

Again, selfishly, I really rely on this forum as an outlet, form of support, way of distracting myself and as an information source to try to make my (hopeful) attempt one day successful. Therefore, I don't like it when the forum is under threat. Minors paint the biggest target on this place in my view.

It also infuriates me that those who want to view this place as a death cult seem to think we want to lure their children in. I'd much rather they kept their children away. Preferebly, notice how unhappy they are and do more to help them.

Of course, I recognise that this is a selfish perspective. I do still feel bad for their plight. I can understand that they are as desperate as us for somewhere to turn. Still- it is also selfish of them to put the forum at risk. Even individual members.

I stupidly replied to a post once. I truthfully only scan read it and for clarity, I nudged them towards recovery because they seemed unsure themselves. However, I got slapped with a 50% warning. Upon rereading the post, they had actually declared their age and they were a minor. I was so pissed off about that. I just tend to avoid members now who seem young a lot of the time. There's not much I can do to help anyway. My perspective is so different now.

But, it's like anyone underage that does something they know full well they shouldn't. If a shop assistant sells alcohol to a minor in the UK, they can personally be held criminally liable and fined £5,000. The child doesn't give a shit about the adult in that situation- or here so- why should we be so invested in them? They're perfectly willing to get us into trouble. I just think that's selfish, no matter how they're feeling.

The more frustrating part for me though is why they are coming here in the first place. The 'normies' and parents out there ought to be horrified that their children's lives are so bad already, that they are contemplating suicide. How the f*ck haven't they noticed it's gotten so bad? Plus, why aren't there more safe spaces for minors to turn to and openly talk about their problems? That gets to me the most. When pro-lifers expend so much energy and time attacking the forum. Especially because youngsters are on it. I just wish they'd invest that time in providing better support for young people. If they cared as much as they claim- they really ought to be doing that.

 

[wondering&wandering]

What is a minor? A minor is defined by law. Generally, 18+ is considered an adult and there's also 21+ when adults can finally do everything legally (e.g. alcohol, casino ... (country specific)).

I'd agree with that definition.

Laws have to be followed, and this here is 18+ content.

To be honest, I'm not overly familiar with laws regarding what's considered 18+ content, but I was getting the impression that a suicide forum doesn't fall under 18+ content such as a porn site (specifically the USA since SS is USA based). Given there's a law, then I agree. But if not, then I think not.

It would be better to ask: Why minors become suicidal, why do they become depressed, why don't they receive the support they need from their parents, why do minors have to live in toxic (abusive) household and ultimately end up suicidal, why are they so hopeless? There're probably more things we can ask.

While I agree those are great questions to ask, and is something to address, I think that lies out of scope of what I was trying to get at: does the SS community care whether or not there are registered minors on this forum?

If those circumstances were better for minors they wouldn't even search for a place like SS. It's the same for adults - if the life of all adults was good, nobody would search for a place like SS.

Hmm, yes and no. I personally think that even if things were way better, there would still be a group (smaller in size I'd say, too) of people (adults and minors) that would still search for a way to ctb because sometimes it isn't about life's current circumstances, but rather the frightening absurdity and monotony of it all that some conclude life is.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

To be honest, I'm not overly familiar with laws regarding what's considered 18+ content, but I was getting the impression that a suicide forum doesn't fall under 18+ content such as a porn site (specifically the USA since SS is USA based). Given there's a law, then I agree. But if not, then I think not.

It becomes complex at this point, and it's always country-specific. I would say suicide content is 18+ like other "cruel" content can be marked as 18+.

While I agree those are great questions to ask, and is something to address, I think that lies out of scope of what I was trying to get at: does the SS community care whether or not there are registered minors on this forum?

Minors can suffer like adults and their feelings are valid. They also search for a safe space yet are denied bc of laws and general consensus.
I have reported obvious minors and I will do so if I find clear evidence in posts.

Hmm, yes and no. I personally think that even if things were way better, there would still be a group (smaller in size I'd say, too) of people (adults and minors) that would still search for a way to ctb because sometimes it isn't about life's current circumstances, but rather the frightening absurdity and monotony of it all that some conclude life is.

There will always be a small group in need. No doubts about that.

 

[33K1LLM3]

Unfortunately Children will kill themselves no matter what, however it is very unfortunate when I hear cases of under 18s, choosing to use this site's resources in order to ctb. The right to die, (pro choice movement), although I think is ageist, still isn't something for under 18s, as it is a massive choice to make. As someone is 19, yes I am still young but I am aware of what I am choosing and what the consequences are, however a 15 year old most likely isn't. It's tough really because I can completely understand why minors do it, they are struggling, I have been depressed since I was 12, I understand how it feels. I just wish they wouldn't of had to come to that conclusion anyway.

 

[Namelesa]

considering this is how you were accused, it makes me wonder how the mods determined that I'm an adult~ xD

Just wondering, how do you handle users who joined as minors but are now adults? For context, I said happy birthday to a user celebrating their 19th birthday recently, but their account was made in late 2023, meaning that they made it when they were 17~ do you just ignore them ig? xD

Probably the more thing that got me suspected was me being trapped by parents as most adults have freedom to at least go outside on their own when I don't. Add on with the chilidish, its absolutly reasonable to suspect I could be under 18. You tho haven't probably haven't expressed anything that would seem you are limited in what you do tho.

For those users we warn them greatly but not ban. You should still report them.

 

[EmptyBottle]

Probably the more thing that got me suspected was me being trapped by parents as most adults have freedom to at least go outside on their own when I don't. Add on with the chilidish, its absolutly reasonable to suspect I could be under 18. You tho haven't probably haven't expressed anything that would seem you are limited in what you do tho.

For those users we warn them greatly but not ban. You should still report them.

thing is, users don't tend to always vent too much, and can lie and say they were in a conservatorship (after reading britney spears news for example).

PS: If the reader reading this is a minor, please stop using the account until ur 18th Birthday (consider joining beyondblue forums or other forums that allow users 13-18+), getting reported sucks (note: your feelings are valid, regardless of age)

 

[bankai]

considering this is how you were accused, it makes me wonder how the mods determined that I'm an adult~ xD

Just wondering, how do you handle users who joined as minors but are now adults? For context, I said happy birthday to a user celebrating their 19th birthday recently, but their account was made in late 2023, meaning that they made it when they were 17~ do you just ignore them ig? xD

Lol looks like they skated by somehow.but that's good sleuthing


I'm sure there will be minors but if they get caught they're not getting off with minor charges.


I had to

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Okay... well, "Most logically thinking people don't want minors here" is a very indirect way of answering, but I suppose I'll take it. We're not in a courtroom I suppose, lol. I suppose I like direct answers too much for my own good.

Are you/were you of the belief that, just because someone is on a "suicide forum", that they aren logically thinking?

Okay, I agree with that. I'm more asking though why SS is doing that even if they don't legally have to.

I'll further clarify one of my responses by saying that I'm by no means aware of ALL US laws pertaining to the Internet, so I really don't know. That question would be better directed towards the website administration.

Oh, sorry, I didn't look at your post history, but I believe you. Interesting point about the age of 25 thing. So you think this community should instead ask people if they're below 25?

I didn't say that. I don't have all the answers, nor do I claim to.

Tamer than the Wild West? Yes, I do.

Wow. There are indiscriminate shootings every day in cities like Philly, Chicago, NY, Baltimore, etc. The US has the highest level of gun deaths of any Western society (please don't get into the 2nd Amendment arguments, of which I am a staunch supporter). I fail to see how society is any "tamer" than it once was. Rapes are occurring at astonishing rates. Drug abuse is rampant. We may have more laws on the books now, but the thing about laws is that there isn't one iotta of proof that they change any human behavior. The only thing they do, can do, is deal with a crime after the fact.

I think it's a poor case to make against trying to find a better way to prevent a minor from registering to this forum.

The ONLY way is to require ID of some sort. Sometimes answers to dilemmas are binary. In this case, one is either anonymous, or they're not. There is no "pseudo-anonymous" choice. I think if you have a problem with US law, you should reach out to the lawmakers and have the change made there.

I don't take it the wrong way. All good. Also, I believe this forum doesn't seem to care much about a minor accessing this site, which is why I'm asking the questions to see what kind of responses I get to either prove me wrong or get me to understand why there is so little care (I could imagine people are preoccupied with their own lives and don't have the energy or even means of doing something about; I suppose that's where I am; but then again, I haven't gotten that kind of response, but rather replies that don't really answer or excuses for why minors will inevitably access this site, have a chance at killing themselves, and nothing being done about it).

Again, the ONLY way to ensure minors don't have access to this site is to require ID of some sort, and it would be impossible to have an anonymous forum and require ID from registrants at the same time. You know, the "gun store" sites, in order to keep minors off their sites, now have an "entrance" requirement that is merely a "click" to attest that you are of legal age to view the website. In essence, an honor system. Why not go after them for "not doing more"? And, speaking of getting "non answers", I see that the idea I put forth originally about you being a reporter, which I do think you are btw, wasn't at all addressed in your response. The way I see it, you're either a reporter attempting to gather juicy tidbits to further your agenda of trying to get this site shutdown, or an aggrieved parent who lost their minor child to suicide and who blames this website for helping them to do so, even though the child's struggles were present LONG before they made it to this website.

I find it a bit funny that you believe there isn't a single minor registered to this forum. Even if I don't have empirical personal evidence of it, it doesn't take that to know that since it does happen, that it has happened again. Not every minor is going to out themselves.

It shouldn't be a question of what I believe, or what you believe, for that matter. Belief is not proof. If you have knowledge of a minor(s) on this site, you should report it to a mod, and it will be investigated and dealt with. I, myself, have reported suspected minors when information surfaced that made me believe they were minors, and the powers-that-be quickly took action. So, in essence, there are actions taken to keep minors off this site. I'd go so far as to say that's what ANY other site that doesn't allow minors does to police their userbase. Why should this site have different requirements?

Actually, though, throwing around accusations without proof of some sort could be considered libelous, so I'd be careful in that regard. That's not a threat. I don't have those kinds of powers. I'm just a user. But, there is plenty of precedent of companies, in this case a website, successfully suing, and winning, damage awards due to libelous claims made against them. Just saying.