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S

Sever

Member
Jun 21, 2019
47
I'm a fucking mess unable to do anything right. My long-term plan is to have some fun, to revenge to the assholes who had ruined my life and finally take the fucking SN. Shit I do even have it but idk too chicken to actually ctb rn. I want these assholes to remember me, prove them i'm not that retard who can easily be tricked and used.

My short-term plan was to have drunk ONS with the guy from Tinder. And it went horribly wrong. I drank too fucking much and guy was taking care of me, next day we were just chilling, cuddling and *BOOM* - "I love you, be my gf". I agreed. Idk why. Maybe I'm an innocent girl who tried acting like a hoe but failed, maybe I was still drunk. However I still doubt if I should break up and how if I actually do this. For him this passion appeared so fucking fast.

Fuck. I'm definitely not a good gf. I want to chill, try drugs, random guys and I don't really know what more - anything that would give me pleasure. I'm sleeping with one more guy and still have ex in my head. I wanna fucking die but too coward to actually do it by myself. Definitely have no future. I didn't expect him to fall in love, talk with me 24/7 and tell about me to his folks.

I'm really stuck and don't know what I can do. This guy seems really caring but I don't trust guys anymore. I'm afraid of the relationship but literally see no reason why he's bad. And what if I finally get the courage to ctb?
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: DeathImminent
azucaramargo

azucaramargo

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2018
1,010
I'm a fucking mess unable to do anything right. My long-term plan is to have some fun, to revenge to the assholes who had ruined my life and finally take the fucking SN. Shit I do even have it but idk too chicken to actually ctb rn. I want these assholes to remember me, prove them i'm not that retard who can easily be tricked and used.

My short-term plan was to have drunk ONS with the guy from Tinder. And it went horribly wrong. I drank too fucking much and guy was taking care of me, next day we were just chilling, cuddling and *BOOM* - "I love you, be my gf". I agreed. Idk why. Maybe I'm an innocent girl who tried acting like a hoe but failed, maybe I was still drunk. However I still doubt if I should break up and how if I actually do this. For him this passion appeared so fucking fast.

Fuck. I'm definitely not a good gf. I want to chill, try drugs, random guys and I don't really know what more - anything that would give me pleasure. I'm sleeping with one more guy and still have ex in my head. I wanna fucking die but too coward to actually do it by myself. Definitely have no future. I didn't expect him to fall in love, talk with me 24/7 and tell about me to his folks.

I'm really stuck and don't know what I can do. This guy seems really caring but I don't trust guys anymore. I'm afraid of the relationship but literally see no reason why he's bad. And what if I finally get the courage to ctb?
You don't want to let yourself enjoy love?
 

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