What are your reasons for being alive right now?

[Pryras]

Buying things for my cats before I leave them with my sister

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

fear of failure and remaining alive with more brain damage.

dumb addictions like youtube social media and others got me to waste all my time i could have used to get my suicide plan and method ready to go and more reliable

 

[Geodude77]

Mainly that I don't know what's on the other side. Or maybe I'm just a pussy idk

 

[encore]

he promised he would do his best to come back, and said that he was sure our last conversation won't be the final one. i'm waiting. every day.

also, my birthday is coming up next month, and he told me he'd get me a gift

 

[TransTaxEvader]

Or maybe I'm just a pussy idk

you're human. it's a human thing.

 

[Lost in a Dream]

Mainly that I don't know what's on the other side. Or maybe I'm just a pussy idk

It's the same for me. I'm afraid there will be an afterlife but I don't want one. I just don't want to exist anymore.

Being 27 weeks pregnant. I struggle everyday, wanting to give up. Then I remember that at least one innocent soul is depending on me.

That "innocent soul" would be better off not being born. How dare you do something so cruel as to bring another life into this world.

 

[TransTaxEvader]

How dare you do something so cruel as to bring another life into this world.

How about how dare the system make people miserable enough to want to commit suicide.

 

[Lost in a Dream]

How about how dare the system make people miserable enough to want to commit suicide.

That too, it just makes everything worse.

 

[grapevoid]

I've been in treatment and barely "graduated" from the program last week, my grandpa passed and his funeral is this coming week and it's someone very close to me birthday on the 17th so I'm just trying to push through these few things now that I'm out of treatment then I'll be back at it.

Being 27 weeks pregnant. I struggle everyday, wanting to give up. Then I remember that at least one innocent soul is depending on me.

You're doing the right thing. Don't make any big life decisions while pregnant. Hormones are no joke.
Not everyone hates life. A lot of people are very happy, love life and are very grateful to be alive, especially grateful to their mothers for selflessly giving up her time, body, and mental well being to give them the opportunity to live. Don't let these negative people make you feel bad for that.

 

[bananaolympus]

My birthday is close i don't know why but i find it very sad dying close to it like dying before christmas or new year

 

[notreallybored]

I currently have THREE bottles of N. What's keeping me from drinking them all right now? I have always found purpose in my life through the work that I do. If I didn't or couldn't find meaningful work, I think I actually would CTB.

ב''ה,
It's rude not to share.

 

[grapevoid]

Selflessly my ass. All parents are selfish for creating new life. And they do it knowing their kids will die one day, without being in control of how horrible that may be. This breeder better have a miscarriage.

Healthy people are happy for the life they lived. It's human nature and evolutionary to procreate. Your thought process is disordered by any realistic and healthy standard yet you're mad at everyone else. out here wishing people miscarriages LOL

I'm sorry life has been so unfair to you, I wish you luck and peace

 

[Lost in a Dream]

I'm sorry life has been so unfair to you, I wish you luck and peace

.

Healthy people are happy for the life they lived. It's human nature and evolutionary to procreate. Your thought process is disordered by any realistic and healthy standard yet you're mad at everyone else. out here wishing people miscarriages LOL

I'm going to apologize for this. I was very drunk earlier.

 

[areyousafe??]

1. A medical appointment this week
2. I still have to transfer the documents I want kept onto a USB

 

[4Kumo7]

The hope of seeing Him again and honestly playing my instrument and hoping to make a career out if it.
After I picked it up, I realized the reason for why I was so suicidal before, was because I didn't have anything I truly wanted to do for the future

 

[arandomname]

The hope of seeing the person I love again

 

[billie]

i only have reasons to kill myself but no reasons to stay alive

 

[Baron Crappylife]

My dad. Only my dad.

 

[Roadrunner]

My dog!

 

[lwovely]

I'm honestly really scared to CTB because of SI. It's super hard to overcome that especially if you're hanging yourself no matter how suicidal you are. I tried to overcome it multiple times growing up and it is just a major barrier that I can't seem to get past.

It's also the fact that I might be paralyzed or have a major condition if I mess up. Which is why I'm still thinking it through and figuring out a plan on how to do it. I'm getting the rope yes but finding an anchor point is still a work in progress.

It's also how my partner would feel about it, I would love to not have people know about my death but I cannot prevent that. I want my partner to understand that I know I was selfish for leaving so soon but I cannot handle it anymore. He deserves someone who is mentally stable and that isn't me. I know he's a successful and smart guy, he can easily find someone. I'm sobbing as I go through life day by day.

 

[Life Is My Coffin]

I'm romantically involved with a girl i've known for 15 years right now. And I promised i'd stay alive for her

She knows I want to die but I said I'll live on for her sake. I don't want to miss out on the happiness she can bring me as she already has been bringing me just that for the last several months now

 

[WatchmeBurn]

Don't want to hurt my parents or my partner. Waiting for my parents to die (perhaps 15+ years so it wont be easy) and assuming my relationship will fall apart at some point.

If it doesn't then I honestly don't know what I'll do. Perhaps the most ethical thing to do would be to break up now so she has long moved on by the time I kill myself, but I cannot bring myself to do it. I'd still rather live and be happy than die, after all, but I just don't believe it's possible anymore.

 

[vincent1]

I'm scared of failing and ending up as a vegetable

 

[noname37]

just waiting for the right place, the right time. don't have a good place to ctb in and i'm too much of a parasite to get a place of my own.

 

[GuppyBoyo]

someone is bound to say it but a big thing for many is a lack of effective means

 

[NonEssential]

My need to ctb is less "I need to die now" and more "I know what to do when something very bad happens in the future." Also I don't have many available options. Most easily accessible and reliable method for me currently is at the nearby train tracks, but I'm not currently at the state of mind to go through with that.

 

[grapevoid]

.

I'm going to apologize for this. I was very drunk earlier.

it happens. I hope you're not too hung over today!

 

[Haematemesis]

curious about life and future

 

[iknowwhatyouredoing]

despite the fact that things have only gotten marginally better throughout my life, i for some reason have faith that it can (not will) get better. i have a cat that depends on me, i have friends that depend on me, and i love to learn. i think one of the bigger reasons for me to continue being alive is out of spite, i dont want to become a trans statistic and i have some urge to fight for the dignity of my trans siblings. however, maintaining that fire without being extinguished by despondent nihilism is a huge battle and suicide is something that often enters my mind. i have no idea if i will win this fight and even though i dont think its my time yet, im always maintaining an unsteady balance and could hypothetically fall into the void at any time

 

[qwertz]

I'm scared