Discussion What keeps you from ending it?

[Dead_Inside]

Life or luck? Shit pick one. I did my damn best to died in a way I wanted to die. Twice. Corrected issues I thought had fucking things up the first time .... but guess life just said nope.
Now I am just trying to figure out another method that won't leave me completely messed up if it fails. Probably just buy a couple guns and unlod them into this. Can't survive everything.... just not possible right??

 

[Final Escape]

Yeah it's quite absurd.
You don't realize how shitty medicine still is until you're dependent on it. And that's in the richest, most advanced countries on earth.

They don't want people to thrive, they want us to die out and especially eradicate white cultures. Goodbye civilization. What I want to know is, what happens after u killed most of the whites off through socialist policies and I mean are they planning to rule over the other ethnic groups? I'd love to see how this multicultural experiment plays out like 200 years from now. There's not going to be much new inventions or nothing like we see today. It's going to look like Detroit all over the place other than where people are not habiting.

 

[Jon86]

A botched attempt. Somehow waking up semi-conscious from a failed hanging attempt unable to move for days with no help in sight. Jumping from a suicide bridge only to break my back and drown in a painful/horrific manor or to be pulled out to live with devastating injuries.

I'll miss my family, etc. but i've talked and openly battled this for decades. I feel euthanasia would be humane in my case at this point.

If I had access to euthanasia or N I wouldn't be here. It's been a long ride downhill for years, one day soon I will have had enough to follow through with it.

 

[Fixin’ToDie]

I want to do in in winter.
It's stupid but for some reason doing it in winter feels right. I'm probably just lying to myself to justify procrastinating but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Same here. More corpse friendly for one thing, especially as I'm not likely to be discovered for a few days. It's winter right now where I am, but getting towards the end of it. In which case am going to have to get a wriggle on, as circumstantial drivers become more and more compelling.

 

[Final Escape]

There was a point in time where I was genuinely happy. I had a few good, close friends and a girlfriend that I loved. Except I was immature and was never properly taught by my parents how to show love and affection. I had basically faked it until I made it. And of course it all came crumbling down after I injured my back and had to drop out of the sport I did. I was less self-aware back then and would bitch about my back pain a lot. My girlfriend began to have contempt for me as I was heading toward rock bottom. (I learned that contempt is one of four major indications for divorce or a breakup). Anyway after she dumped me everything fell apart and I have actually managed to cobble myself together the past few years. However I have hit a point where I am spiraling down again. I've ordered my charcoal etc but at the same time I have began to take my lexapro and Ritalin again. I want to accomplish a few things before I make a final decision. I still have a sliver of hope that it could get better. So for now I might wait a few years and do grad school to see how things go.

I hope u have read the book called Worthless by Aaron Clarey before u go to any more college. It tells you wether higher education is a good idea. Especially these days. The truth about degrees today. What is worth it and what is not.

 

[Final Escape]

The biggest is my children. Im not done raising my youngest. This has been going on off and on since I was 12, Im 48 now. I have a little hope that it will get better, but at this point in my life, I highly doubt it. But my main focus is my children regardless. Also I believe in God and Jesus and I do not want to end up on the other side. But I honestly think I am a mistake and was not meant to be born.

U were not a mistake, be greatful u have your children. The abortion clinic terminated all mine without really giving me any other solutions to my unplanned pregnancies. I was unaware of the real reasons indiscriminate abortion is legal.

 

[okyeah]

I hope u have read the book called Worthless by Aaron Clarey before u go to any more college. It tells you wether higher education is a good idea. Especially these days. The truth about degrees today. What is worth it and what is not.

Yeah I really don't want to deep down but I feel like it is the only thing that can give me any self-worth. I'm really just secretly hoping I can make new friends I genuinely like or somehow get my life 100% in order if I went.

 

[harakiri-enthusiast]

Not gonna lie, i'm scared as hell.

 

[Sha70]

U were not a mistake, be greatful u have your children. The abortion clinic terminated all mine without really giving me any other solutions to my unplanned pregnancies. I was unaware of the real reasons indiscriminate abortion is legal.

My mother almost aborted me. She was about to go to her appt until my sister opened up her big mouth and said something like God would not have given you a baby if he didn't want to. If my sister had kept quiet, I would not have been born.

 

[Comatose11]

I don't want to be found in time. Once that gets elimininated, goodbye world.

 

[Deleted member 847]

I don't want to be found in time. Once that gets elimininated, goodbye world.

Drink something before if you want to hang.

 

[Comatose11]

Drink something before if you want to hang.

I'm not old enough to purchase alcohol so I'm going to take an anti anxiety drug

 

[Deleted member 847]

I'm not old enough to purchase alcohol so I'm going to take an anti anxiety drug

Yeah. Also when you're about to faint close your eyes and count to 10. The only time I almost died by hanging was when I was testing my rope and didn't actually think I really was going to die (i did faint). Being distracted from death is the trick.

 

[Comatose11]

Yeah. Also when you're about to faint close your eyes and count to 10. The only time I almost died by hanging was when I was testing my rope and didn't actually think I really was going to die (i did faint). Being distracted from death is the trick.

Thank you. The last thing I want is the stupid survival instinct getting in the way.

 

[Dip]

U were not a mistake, be greatful u have your children. The abortion clinic terminated all mine without really giving me any other solutions to my unplanned pregnancies. I was unaware of the real reasons indiscriminate abortion is legal.

Don't you have the option to put the baby up for adoption once they're born?

 

[nasblue]

Another thing: I don't feel like my life is miserable enough yet. If I was severly in debt, disabled, completely isolated, etc. I think it'd be quite easy to take that step.

 

[Final Escape]

Don't you have the option to put the baby up for adoption once they're born?

The abortion clinic does not talk to u about this stuff or try to dissuade u in any way because they make money by terminating the baby or selling it for the parts. They sell fetal tissue and of course I had no idea that's probably why they make u wait to abort till u are at least 7 weeks along. I think more women would choose adoption if you actually benefited from going through the entire 9 months of pregnancy to then have to give your baby away. The way it's setup now women do not gain anything financially for example by going through the pain of full 9 months of pregnancy. If you were paid well or given some kind of benefit. People balk at the thought of selling your child (obviously not to dangerous people) but it would be more incentive to not get an abortion. Right now it's the state that benefits financially through adoption. This is why there is so few women giving their babies up for adoption and turn to abortion instead. Or they become single mothers which isn't great either for the kid. Yes it was an option but because I was pretty poor and couldn't really take time off work to be pregnant. I didn't know how I would deal with many months out of work. I would tell women never to go to planned parenthood and to try to seek other options. Planned parenthood is funded by the state and not a private entity which actually might care about what is best for babies and women. Abortion may sometimes be needed but planned parenthood indiscriminately performs abortions. They don't care why u are getting an abortion, makes no difference if your baby is healthy and not a result of rape or incest. I had a lot of issues and needed therapy for difficult childhood but this stuff never addressed. It's not like I wanted my babies terminated I just felt like I had no choice. What they sell to women as a choice actually is not a desirable choice. I don't think most women want to kill their unborn, but when faced with single motherhood or the financial hardship of unplanned pregnancy, u are in crisis mode and it's tempting to pick the easiest, most expedient but terrible solution that u might live to regret down the road.

 

[Dip]

The abortion clinic does not talk to u about this stuff or try to dissuade u in any way because they make money by terminating the baby or selling it for the parts. They sell fetal tissue and course I had no idea that's probably why they make u wait to abort till u are at least 7 weeks along.

Why were you taking advice from people interested only in profiting from the abortions and fetuses? That's like asking a pharmaceutical company whether you should take their drugs or consider other options.

I think more women would choose adoption if you actually benefited from going through the entire 9 months of pregnancy to then have to give your baby away. The way it's setup now women do not gain anything financially for example by going through the pain of full 9 months of pregnancy. If you were paid well or given some kind of benefit. People balk at the thought of selling your child but it would be more incentive to not get an abortion.

Children are already expensive to take care of, there are many children spending time in foster care because there aren't people who will adopt them and you want to add another cost to getting a child to take care of?

And if you're not looking to sell the kid to such people then who would you sell the kid to? The only other people who would be interested in such an arrangement would be those that could make a financial return on the child. That necessitates treating the child like private property to protect the buyer's "investment".

It's easy to say women should get a financial benefit, but from whom and why would they pay for the baby?

Right now it's the state that benefits financially through adoption. This is why there is so few women giving their babies up for adoption and turn to abortion instead.

Again, who is going to actually put down money to get the baby? Especially given that there are already so many children of various ages in the foster care system because there aren't enough people willing to adopt them.

Or they become single mothers which isn't great either for the kid.

Indeed, that is not a good alternative.

Yes it was an option but because I was pretty poor and couldn't really take time off work to be pregnant. I didn't know how I would deal with many months out of work.

In that case isn't having an abortion a rational choice because you cannot afford the pregnancy?

 

[Final Escape]

Well kids in foster care are not adopted because of the middle man called the state. Also older kids who were taken away from parents usually have lots of problems and might have all sorts of behavioral problems that require special care. The reason people cannot adopt is because there are so many barriers that the state puts up to allow more kids to be adopted. If the state was not involved a lot less kids would be in foster care in the first place and less unplanned pregnancies. Women used to have to be very careful to pick a guy who would stick around so u don't end up a single mother or with an unreliable partner. Then the state intervention made us less moral and now all kinds of problems are a result of this. You can think of foster care as being similar to a dog pound. Often the animals don't get adopted because they have behavior problems, have been abused, and are damaged. This is why people would rather adopt and buy a baby animal off Craigslist for example. Way cheaper oftentimes, and u are more likely to get an undamaged pet.

 

[Final Escape]

Oh there would be plenty of rich couples who cannot have kids who would want to buy your child in order to adopt him or her. I heard of a friend who secretly tried to sell her baby to a well off couple but it got discovered and it didn't work out. It's a very sad story, the couple ended up committing suicide after this was found out. Not sure why.

 

[Final Escape]

I went to the abortion clinic because I didn't see other options at the time. It really comes down to that. I noticed that with each pregnancy abortion seemed to get easier and I detached from the whole thing. I definitely felt depressed in the aftermath. Grief over the abortions didn't hit till down the road. I didn't expect to experience a whole lot of emotional pain and regret down the road. I guess I numbed out the whole thing and tried to detach from the reality that it's a baby and not just a blob of tissue like they want women to think.

 

[ningaman151]

I have no access to an easy, peaceful, and highly lethal method.

 

[RainAndSadness]

I'm in possession of N so I would have done it already, but I feel responsible for my girlfriend, which is one of the reasons why I set my date to September. I don't want to drag her down with me, she doesn't deserve that so I need to take care of that first. But that's it really. Everything else became pointless. And as soon as I took care of that one last thing I'm gonna leave. I've made peace with myself and I'm ready to do it, mentally. I don't think there will be any doubts or second thoughts. I know it's the right decision and the solution to all of my problems.

I really can't wait. And I'm so thankful I can do it soon with a peaceful method. This forum probably did more for me than any other person ever in my life.