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Dying Opportunity

Dying Opportunity

What looks so strong, so delicate
May 9, 2025
72
First attempt: drowning
failed because I was a dumb elementary schooler and tried to do it in a busy pool with lifeguards. Yes I'm serious.

Second attempt: fatal stab wounds
SI kicked in before I could even make a nick

My next available method is hanging. I will stay around longer than I'd want to go because I both need to ensure that I follow protocol properly, to ensure that no one can interfere, and to train myself to ignore my SI and guilt about leaving my family behind.
 
CumbriaCTB

CumbriaCTB

Member
Jul 15, 2025
52
Method: Alcohol Poisoning (lmao)

What Went Right:
  • Good research - I found that, at my height and weight, I would need to consume at least ~600ml of pure ethanol (I chose 2L of 40% vodka, ~800ml of pure ethanol, for good measure).
  • I chose to CTB inside my house (I live alone) so that I would not be interrupted by a member of the public.
  • The equipment (the vodka bottles and a 250ml tumbler) was stored in an easily accessible location.

What Went Wrong:
  • I overestimated my ability to consume the vodka quick enough (I have a strong gag reflex) and became so intoxicated after 750ml of vodka that I forgot that I was trying to CTB.
  • I told somebody what I was doing, the Police were called, and I drunkenly unlocked the door and started laughing at the officers' shoes???
  • I didn't prepare a grab-bag of useful kit for paramedics to bring - I ended up having to walk home from the hospital in my pyjamas with no phone and no cash.

Correcting My Mistakes:
  • Switched to a method that isn't completely stupid (full suspension hanging).
  • Deleted social media so that I don't tell anybody who knows me IRL that I'm about to CTB.
  • I plan to remove the SIM card from my phone and hide them both in separate locations so I can't quickly dial 999 if I go into panic mode.
 
  • Informative
Reactions: AreWeWinning
QuincyME

QuincyME

Member
Feb 23, 2024
90
Ive had way to many attempts to count , i dont remember all of them but this is what i do.My first attempt I jumped off the roof of my great grandmother's house as a child , ended up with a bunch of bruises and a twisted leg but nothing serious. I should've known 3 stories wasn't enough.
My second attempt I tried cutting open my wrist, didn't realize you had to cut incredibly deep and how painful it can be if you aren't ready.
Third attempt my first big attempt. I overdosed ibuprofen and ended up having to get my stomach pumped.
Never again.....
After that I don't remember all of the remember of my attempts.
But here are the bigs ones I remember
I overdosed on 3000mg of Benadryl and flatlined in the ambulance on the way to the hospital. I had what I was told a total of over 30 seizures that day and way lucky to have survived.
I had a Benadryl addiction for a few years and it's understandable why I went so far to try and end my suffering. It just was never a good way to end myself and never will be.
Overdosed on heroin, I was given narcan but I don't remember much about it .

In another attempt I used a knife to cut open my wrist again this time succeeding in cutting veins throughout my arm and bleeding out in my room. Police showed up to me holding a knife and having to take it away from me before I lost consciousness. I really wish I want caught because this one could have been the one.

I hung myself and was saved before any significant damage was done to my brain .

I've overdosed on all my prescriptions at one , so antidepressants, anti psycotics, anti anxiety pills .... I had to get my stomach pumped again.

And I took like 7000mg of thc , got black out drunk had multiple seizures and my heart stopped at one point. Kinda a dumb one but it happened.
Did you cut veins or arteries? If it was veins, which veins did you cut? Would you have died if it wasn't for 5-0.
 

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