Method Which would you rather, drown or partial hang?

[quietpill]

I have complicated but similar feelings about guns.

I actually used to hunt all the time, I could still go but I just don't have the energy anymore. I did it to supplement our food because I've always been kind of poor. But even then, guns have always scared me. Hate it and am constantly awareof it and am uncomfortable when I'm wielding one. But they're tools just like anything else, so I just would use them anyway. It just felt incredibly weird holding them

You're definitely right that they're just tools. I never hunted, but I had a close family member that would take me to gun ranges when I was young, they gave me quite the traumatic experience with guns too, which has definitely contributed to my aversion.

I do think ultimately, I could resort to a gun. It would just need to be some extenuating circumstances, all panic and impulse. I prefer the comfort of a plan.

 

[dontlook]

You're definitely right that they're just tools. I never hunted, but I had a close family member that would take me to gun ranges when I was young, they gave me quite the traumatic experience with guns too, which has definitely contributed to my aversion.

I do think ultimately, I could resort to a gun. It would just need to be some extenuating circumstances, all panic and impulse. I prefer the comfort of a plan.

I went to ranges and I don't think I ever really had a traumatic experience involving guns, and yet I still get so wigged out.

For some reason killing myself with a gun just seems so scary. I don't think I could, but if I did I think you're right about it having to be in a complete panic. I think I'd have to have no other option and be cornered

 

[savory]

Oh, I see, that's a lot more post-death situational awareness than I had, I assumed only first responders would see my corpse, but even if that were the case that would be another awful trauma on their plate. It's hard to find a kind way to die? I get wrapped up in the abstract thoughts, think my "symbolism" here I think would be in the defilement of what I am perceived of as in my everyday life. To be found after going missing, if I'm found, my corpse being bloated and disgusting/unrecognizable would be vindicating? Maybe fulfilling? But maybe those both come from the hurt, malicious parts of me that want to blame the world and show how it's made me feel, finally wrought on the outside... But I'm operating under an assumption of my body being judged regardless, you may be more correct on society not being able to judge it at all by then, rendering it a bit pointless to care how ugly the corpse would look, and it feels a bit vain to fixate on I fear. I'm not sure ultimately if "symbolism" is the right word to describe the thought, but I'm not sure what I'd mean in it's stead.

It's nice to see a similar gun sentiment though, I always feel like it's a bit weak of me to not want that when guns are such an "obvious" answer.

I suspected thats what you were getting at. No wonder vengeance is a popular theme in media.

Oh, I see, that's a lot more post-death situational awareness than I had, I assumed only first responders would see my corpse, but even if that were the case that would be another awful trauma on their plate. It's hard to find a kind way to die? I get wrapped up in the abstract thoughts, think my "symbolism" here I think would be in the defilement of what I am perceived of as in my everyday life. To be found after going missing, if I'm found, my corpse being bloated and disgusting/unrecognizable would be vindicating? Maybe fulfilling? But maybe those both come from the hurt, malicious parts of me that want to blame the world and show how it's made me feel, finally wrought on the outside... But I'm operating under an assumption of my body being judged regardless, you may be more correct on society not being able to judge it at all by then, rendering it a bit pointless to care how ugly the corpse would look, and it feels a bit vain to fixate on I fear. I'm not sure ultimately if "symbolism" is the right word to describe the thought, but I'm not sure what I'd mean in it's stead.

It's nice to see a similar gun sentiment though, I always feel like it's a bit weak of me to not want that when guns are such an "obvious" answer.

I suspected that's what you were getting at. I think symbolism is an appropriate word, attritubting meaning to something or someone. It seems a lot of us here take into great consideration what statement or impact our deaths will make, and what will be thought of us.

On the topic of guns, I have my opinions but I'd rather not air them on this thread. I don't think you're weak for not choosing a gun as your way out.