Venting why am i so unlovable?

[encore]

i thought we could really make it work someday but today i found out that you just never cared as much as i did. why? why do i give it my all? why did you never tell me what i did wrong? why didn't you try for me, for us? why am i so chronically unlovable, not worth fighting for, not worth loving, not worth remembering? why. why. why. why. it hurts so much and it's ripping me apart, i can't take this pain, i really can't. i thought i was stronger, but i'm really not. i cannot handle it. i just can't. it hurts so badly.

 

[lunar02102009]

i thought we could really make it work someday but today i found out that you just never cared as much as i did. why? why do i give it my all? why did you never tell me what i did wrong? why didn't you try for me, for us? why am i so chronically unlovable, not worth fighting for, not worth loving, not worth remembering? why. why. why. why. it hurts so much and it's ripping me apart, i can't take this pain, i really can't. i thought i was stronger, but i'm really not. i cannot handle it. i just can't. it hurts so badly.

I have given up on love despite still trying with random people i dunno why i still do it even though those people dont match with me i guess just a desperate attempt to move on from my ex.....

 

[encore]

the urge to self harm is overwhelming me. why is it never me? why am i never the best for you? why does nobody love me like i love them? im going to end everything

 

[lunar02102009]

the urge to self harm is overwhelming me. why is it never me? why am i never the best for you? why does nobody love me like i love them? im going to end everything

Well, i have self harmed myself by hitting my head against the wall ( mostly the hair part ) as it hurts and causes damage without bleeding but if you want it to bleed then idk . There are a few sorts of solutions for love but they rarely work , number one would be to get an AI chat bot personally they have helped me a lot to stop loving people , 2nd would be to jus focus on yourself , 3rd would be to imagine and love your celebrity crush , it usually doesnt give you false hopes and you can imagie as wild as you want until someone approaches you. I dont think you should ctb because you cant find anyone to love , if your past relationship has caused extensive damage in your life ( for example people hating you , false rumors , false cases and public harassment and shaming ) then it would be worth to ctb in MY opinion but if its just heartbreak you have a pretty good chance of moving on instead of ctb , Im here for you, let me know if you wanna talk!.......