RosebyAnyName
Staring at the ceiling for 6 hours
- Nov 9, 2023
- 235
I've been considering EMDR therapy and I found a good therapist, but I'm too scared to talk to therapists about my fear of men. I've realized that I don't want to stop being afraid of men, I just wish instead that people took my pain seriously instead of seeing it as an "irrational" fear to overcome, and that once I'm "fixed" I'll just love men and worship them like gods, because society insists that's what a "good, healthy, mentally well" woman would do. I don't even want to be a "good, healthy, and mentally well" woman, what I really want is to avoid the pain that is inevitable with the life path "good" women are expected to take. Really all I want is to not get consumed by intrusive thoughts from the dumbest, smallest triggers that remind me of men. I don't know what to do anymore, I just want to give up and forget about therapy since it's always just made my androphobia worse anyways.