Female role in sex makes me suicidal as a woman

[iamanavalanche]

being a woman fcking sucks with the way we're sexualised and fetishised in the most rpey and aggressive ways

 

[Alpenglow]

Shut up tyrant I specifically said this act triggers me and people are defending it in my mentions

Sorry I must've missed it while reading through everything. People should've stopped commenting on it when you said so and I'm sorry I didn't. Maybe you could ask a mod to close the post? And if you ever make a post like this again, try to remind ppl that it triggers you? I'm not sure how else you could avoid it happening again.

 

[quietwoods]

I'm not sure how else you could avoid it happening again.

By not making a post about it in the first place or only talking about it in private conversations.

This is a public discussion forum. It is unreasonable to make a post about something and then not expect everyone to talk about the topic of the post.

 

[stink144]

With all due sensitivity here... I think the general consensus is that you are entitled to feel what you feel and want (or not want) the things you want. If something triggers you or seems completely intolerable or horrible to you, then don't do it. Tell your partner clearly no. If your partner forces you anyway against your will or tries to shame you or guilt you. Leave that partner, follow through with law enforcement to report an assault/rape if he forces you to do anything or even tries to force you to do anything you don't want to do.

But there's no good to your own psyche to be gained by worrying yourself over what other people are doing in their sex lives that you don't approve of. This is how gay people get oppressed by straight people all the time, where straight people find gay acts to be "disgusting" or whatever and think they have the right to shame them for liking what they like... What other consenting (and there's that word again, consent, because it is HUGELY important) adults do is and should be up to them.

You don't have to like anything that anyone else likes or does. You can support someone who was forced or coerced against their will. You should be supported if the same happens to you. But maybe try and not think so much about what everyone else is doing in their own relationships... because that way lies madness, I assure you.

But it's violence against women and I'ma. Woman.

You know that you can can choose your partner, no one is forcing you to have rough sex. If you don't like rough sex, then just don't do it, lol. Or just don't have sex in general. Its all in your control. I don't understand how this is making you feel suicidal.

Because I'ma. Woman and other women get face fucked and female submission in sex is biological and it's depressing???

 

[Alpenglow]

By not making a post about it in the first place or only talking about it in private conversations.

This is a public discussion forum. It is unreasonable to make a post about something and then not expect everyone to talk about the topic of the post.

This is a much easier way to find like minded people to discuss something that hurts you. Though it probably back fired a bit lol ^^'

 

[Dejected 55]

But it's violence against women and I'ma. Woman.

Because I'ma. Woman and other women get face fucked and female submission in sex is biological and it's depressing???

I 100% get where you are coming from, and I will always support you on that point. Point of fact, I think I already posted earlier in the thread how I am not a fan at all of this particular thing (face-fucking). I don't personally understand how a woman would enjoy it, and I agree with you that it seems like a power-play from the male perspective. I don't understand it.

That said... I still have to fall back on not imposing my belief on others. If two adults consent to an activity, who am I to tell them they are wrong?

Some people like to be slapped. Men and women. IF someone slaps you and you didn't want it, then that is abuse. But what if a person likes it and requests it? There's a whole range of painful to semi-painful activities that people enjoy. Some people like their butt to be slapped. Again, it's violence if unwanted but if they want it, then I don't feel like I have the right to discourage them.

Arguably the act of traditional heterosexual missionary-position can be viewed as an act of aggression, and I know some women do view sex this way. There are women who want no part in sex at all, as is their right. But they wouldn't have the right to declare sex as invalid for everyone else, right?

I'm honestly trying to honor and respect your feelings... and as I said, I actually feel the same about this particular triggering activity as you do... so I'm right there with you on not understanding or liking it. But apparently some people do... and if they do... I don't think I have the right to shame them for it. That's all I'm saying. I hope that is coming through.

 

[AAE]

Just stopping by sending a friendly hug to all the women (and men) who are just as disgusted by all these things as I am. For the record I'm a 40 year old guy who has never had sex and would never ever want to. You're all worth the love of a person who respects you as an equal, don't accept anything less.

 

[stink144]

I 100% get where you are coming from, and I will always support you on that point. Point of fact, I think I already posted earlier in the thread how I am not a fan at all of this particular thing (face-fucking). I don't personally understand how a woman would enjoy it, and I agree with you that it seems like a power-play from the male perspective. I don't understand it.

That said... I still have to fall back on not imposing my belief on others. If two adults consent to an activity, who am I to tell them they are wrong?

Some people like to be slapped. Men and women. IF someone slaps you and you didn't want it, then that is abuse. But what if a person likes it and requests it? There's a whole range of painful to semi-painful activities that people enjoy. Some people like their butt to be slapped. Again, it's violence if unwanted but if they want it, then I don't feel like I have the right to discourage them.

Arguably the act of traditional heterosexual missionary-position can be viewed as an act of aggression, and I know some women do view sex this way. There are women who want no part in sex at all, as is their right. But they wouldn't have the right to declare sex as invalid for everyone else, right?

I'm honestly trying to honor and respect your feelings... and as I said, I actually feel the same about this particular triggering activity as you do... so I'm right there with you on not understanding or liking it. But apparently some people do... and if they do... I don't think I have the right to shame them for it. That's all I'm saying. I hope that is coming through.

Please stop. Just stop. Face fucking is violence even if there's consent

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Please stop. Just stop. Face fucking is violence even if there's consent

No, it isn't. You do realize you can just dislike something and find it icky without having to make it out to be violent and immoral, right?

 

[lorie]

Oh dear, this thread is quite something. Though, lots of interesting points have been made here and I wanna give my two cents too. I just want to say beforehand that you're not alone in feeling this way, for I am sort of repulsed at the way women are treated during sex too. However, I have no desire to have sex with a man, nor have I ever done it before so I don't really have enough experience to add something meaningful into that particular discussion, but I'm just going to entertain the idea that I do lol.
I've seen a lot of people say that consent is all that matters and that different people like different things, which is definitely true, but leaves a lot of crucial things unsaid. For example, a lot of women can feel forced to partake in sexual acts solely to satisfy their partner's needs, and even though they technically consented, it still feels so wrong, and the experience can be quite humiliating for them. Of course, everyone should be able to reject any suggestions they're uncomfortable with or that they won't find any enjoyment in, but I feel as if its simply not the case for a lot of women who may prioritise their partner's feelings over their own (I think that's why there's a pretty major orgasm gap between women and men). The uptick in porn viewership and the normalisation of what may be considered 'kinky' sex has definitely worsened this. The problem with porn is that it is unconsciously being used as a sort of tool to educate people on what sex is supposed to look like, and so they leave with an extremely distorted view on sex and place unrealistic expectations on their own experiences. It affects everyone, from men who feel as if their body (mainly alluding to their penis size) and their performance isn't sufficient enough, to women who also have to deal with unrealistic body expectations and have to endure sexual experiences they aren't fully okay with, because porn decides on what's 'normal' or not. Can we please not pretend that there is nothing wrong with pornography because there definitely is when it comes to this. There are also a plethora of other issues that come with it that I won't get into for now, but I just want to say that it can most definitely be blamed for the way our modern society views sex., and by extension, the way women are treated during the act. I feel like this is an issue that requires more elaborations and nuance than the simple ' its okay if two adults are consenting' response.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Oh dear, this thread is quite something. Though, lots of interesting points have been made here and I wanna give my two cents too. I just want to say beforehand that you're not alone in feeling this way, for I am sort of repulsed at the way women are treated during sex too. However, I have no desire to have sex with a man, nor have I ever done it before so I don't really have enough experience to add something meaningful into that particular discussion, but I'm just going to entertain the idea that I do lol.
I've seen a lot of people say that consent is all that matters and that different people like different things, which is definitely true, but leaves a lot of crucial things unsaid. For example, a lot of women can feel forced to partake in sexual acts solely to satisfy their partner's needs, and even though they technically consented, it still feels so wrong, and the experience can be quite humiliating for them. Of course, everyone should be able to reject any suggestions they're uncomfortable with or that they won't find any enjoyment in, but I feel as if its simply not the case for a lot of women who may prioritise their partner's feelings over their own (I think that's why there's a pretty major orgasm gap between women and men). The uptick in porn viewership and the normalisation of what may be considered 'kinky' sex has definitely worsened this. The problem with porn is that it is unconsciously being used as a sort of tool to educate people on what sex is supposed to look like, and so they leave with an extremely distorted view on sex and place unrealistic expectations on their own experiences. It affects everyone, from men who feel as if their body (mainly alluding to their penis size) and their performance isn't sufficient enough, to women who also have to deal with unrealistic body expectations and have to endure sexual experiences they aren't fully okay with, because porn decides on what's 'normal' or not. Can we please not pretend that there is nothing wrong with pornography because there definitely is when it comes to this. There are also a plethora of other issues that come with it that I won't get into for now, but I just want to say that it can most definitely be blamed for the way our modern society views sex., and by extension, the way women are treated during the act. I feel like this is an issue that requires more elaborations and nuance than the simple ' its okay if two adults are consenting' response.

If you don't feel comfortable with something, then communicate that. Otherwise, that is no one else's problem. Women need to stop infantilizing themselves all the time. I'm saying this as a woman. If you don't like something then use your big girl voice. Simple as that.

The OP is arguing that face-fucking in general is violent and bad, even in cases where women actually like it and consent to it. They don't care about nuance, so I don't get the point of even brining this shit up.

 

[YandereMikuMistress]

I even asked normies if acts like face fucking are common in normal relationships and they answered yes
I can't take it I can't stand being a woman it's so humiliating.

ITs fucked..
I hate what I am with every subservient way we are perceived,, like slaves.